Saving hope

[Hitmebabyonemoretime]

This is my first post in the HT forum.

My Gender dreaming name is hit me baby one more time bc going into this - I very much felt that this was my last baby. One more time.

I found out that my sway for a daughter failed and since then I've been faced with the ultimate gender disappointment: NEVER having a daughter.

I have 4 sons already - 2 are grown (15&20) and 2 are very young, and number 5 is closer behind them all.

I'm clinging to the option of high tech as my saving grace - to my sanity and my dreams.

I'm a 39 year old Canadian, and only 11 weeks pregnant so HT is a long way off which is both a blessing and a curse. I'm no spring chicken, time is NOT on my side, but I need to figure out how to finance this dream, and if I were physically able to go right now, the money would not be there.

I am thinking if we can we will budget for 2 cycles and if they both fail we will turn to perhaps a donor embryo with pgd. I'm just learning about this option, and would love to learn more about it, although my husband really doesn't favour this idea - as "if we have a daughter I want to see you in her" (pass me another box of tissues please) but any daughter is better than none so it's what is like to fall back on.

Anyways if anyone has any stories to share about a) being Canadian during this process, b) being early 40's and going through it and c) choosing donor embryos id be grateful for any info you can share.

I'll go back to folding boy clothes now, and count the blessings I've been granted.



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[XXforhubby]

Oh sweetie, I just want to give you a big hug! I'm sure others will chime in to give you information about the processes.

Hang in there, and I'll be hoping right along with you- even when you seem to lose it !!


DS1🏼, DS2, DS3 Jan. '16 I'll sway for a DD for my DH!!

[coralsky]

Oh Hun, I want to give you a hug too!! I have kind of been where you are, having had 3 failed HT cycles, then swaying and finding out he was a he... then being so much more disappointed that I thought I would be... I completely understand the need for the 'DD-door' to be kept open.. it does help, and I promise it will get easier (but I am sure you know that too) anyway I am now currently pregnant with HT DD (v early stages) and the best advice I can give you is to renew your membership, and read-read-read in the members section (tons of helpful advice, completed cycles, and donor embryo info there) while you are cooking your beautiful new DS! Honestly for HT help & info, it is the best $12 I have ever spent! Sending you love & hugs xxx

[nuthinbutpink]

I am here in California with WAD who has moved on to DE. In the member section, you can connect with lots of moms and if you are open to DE, that will almost guarantee you a daughter one day. IVF at 40+ is difficult but not impossible. We have one member that has found success twice with her own eggs at 40 and 42.

[coralsky]

Yes, and I remember a member called Katiecool who was a OHW at 40 with her own eggs too... not usual for that to happen, but certainly possible! And we all know Jany is an inspiration xxx

[atomic sagebrush]

JMO but I would look long and hard at donor eggs FIRST. They are great and I wish more people would use them. The environment you provide for that little XX has been shown by science to matter just as much as actual genetics and she will be yours no matter what. (Many of us have found our daughters favor our husbands anyway - mine sure does)

Jany did have success but look at her siggie and everything she went through before she got her first daughter. I think it's FANTASTIC that it worked for her in the end but it is not something that many of us can financially and spiritually do. Being a one or two hit wonder at 40/41 is not going to be a likely scenario at all and I just really really think donor eggs are an awesome resource and not "second best" at all.

[Hitmebabyonemoretime]

Thank you for all the responses! I'll be joining ASAP - and I really do want to look more at donor options - as I agree with atomic, I'm sure any offspring of mine will always look like their dad anyways lol. I'm going to be creeping your profiles, signatures, posts.


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