Oh sweet sweet mama, I am in tears after reading your story. I too have a son with autism, who is just like you describe your son, silly, loving, looks right into your soul. Children with autism are so pure and real, honest and sooo worth all the struggles. And we have also battled many things with him. He also had a very threatening illness last year. We were so scared of losing him and you are going through the worst loss imaginable. I can not express my deep deep sympathy with you enough. I am so very sorry you lost your beautiful son. And so very sorry you lost your beautiful babygirl as well. That I can relate to as well. I can not believe the sadness you have to endure in your life. I hope and pray you will get your so much desired baby girl and that he or she is healthy. It's true that a new baby will bring hope, not to replace a child, but to bring love and light. Wishing you all the best.