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[ksmom]

While it may seem like timing sways, it doesn't. Really the best time to conceive is O-3, O-2, O-1 and to a lesser extent O day. If you're DTD on O-3 only, then that's swaying pink because it leaves one attempt in the fertile window AND because it's a few days out from ovulation, not as many sperm remain which sways pink as well. It seems like fewer sperm equals more girls but not always of course because there's always exceptions. There have been so many Shettles opposites that I have a hard time believing in it. O-3 does cut odds of conception more so than BD at pos. Opk which is what Atomic suggests since she wants best odds of pregnancy so we're not swaying for ages. I will say though that I did get pregnant with a 3 day cutoff first month TTC while swaying but baby didn't stick. I have a friend who had a 2 day cutoff and is about to have her daughter so I think it's more of it being number of attempts rather than the actual day. Of course if you want to include timing that's completely up to you. We all have to tweak our sways to suit us our own individual circumstances.

The advanced opks drive me bonkers. lol I'll get several days of high readings which is totally normal so don't worry if that's what happening. Clearblue says it's fine to get up to 8 before getting a peak reading. I do use that kind but I find the cheapie OPK sticks or the regular digital ones are easier.

Good luck!

[Faithinpink]

Hey there is plenty of food ideas in dream members section and they are yummy. Xx

[atomic sagebrush]

Hi Ksmom,

I agree that Shettles has been debunked. Yet, I can't help but notice that many of the studies DO demonstrate a consistently higher percentage of female babies conceived specifically and only with the three day cut-off, somewhere around 60%. There may be something hormonal happening three days before ovulation that we don't yet understand. It seems relatively promising when I look over other people's documented sways and check their results, but obviously it doesn't work for everyone. The biggest problem with the three day cut-off is that many people apparently can't get pregnant.

I'd like to try to do it using the Advanced Digital Ovulation Test from Clear Blue Easy that identifies your top four fertile days. However I noticed last month (while I was just in observation mode, not trying to actually get pregnant yet) it identified my top five fertile days which threw me off... I'll just have to do my best. However, I also want my kids to be close in age so if we don't get pregnant after a couple of months of cutoff I'm going to broaden my approach and try closer ovulation.

It is TOTALLY fine to do a 3 day cutoff if it floats your boat. It's just that we want that to be among the first things that you drop instead of keeping that till the bitter end while giving up on everything else. So many of us have 2,3,4 or more boys conceived with 3 day cutoffs that it's very easy for us to turn our backs on it. Starting off with 3 day cutoff is cool - starting off with 4-7 day cutoff like I've seen a lot of people do is not gonna work.

The studies where a)no external medication was used to induce ovulation (like Clomid) and b)people's O day was confirmed by professionals and NOT self-reported or charting and the professionals were not profiting from proving timing correct, and c) in studies where most of the people could stick to the program and not drop out (we have a fair number of studies where 300 people started it and only 30 finished because they couldn't stick to the program or couldn't get pregnant) did NOT find that. I've read dozens, if not hundreds of timing studies by this point and most of them are useless or misleading. In fact the reliable studies found 50-50 boys and girls conceived every day of the cycle, with even a teensy bump O-1 and O Day. And evolutionarily it makes no sense because if a boy didn't have enough nutrients to survive on Wednesday, he wouldn't on Thursday either and I just don't think that's how our body operates, that type of random fluke just doesn't evolve that way. But, it is 110% your sway your way and it isn't harmful so if you want to use it, at your discretion.

Re the Clearblue advanced, yes that thing gives everyone fits. We often see it going "high fertility" for 8 days without ever going to "peak", or just going straight to "peak" without the promised days of high. So jsut keep that in mind when you're using it.

[atomic sagebrush]

minerals at your discretion, just like timing that's something that's way easier to give up once you've had opposites that way which many of us have had. Just so you know, I have it on authority from ladies who have actually done the Dutch program in the Netherlands that the LE Diet is actually quite similar to the types of foods they recommend so you're not hurting yourself by doing a primarily LE Diet but just keeping sodium low and taking cal-mag supps.

At BMI 19 I don' want you to lose any weight if you can avoid it. Keep eating what you need to keep your weight stable but switch over from animal/saturated fats to eating more Omega 6/vegetable sources, and decreasing protein/fat vs. carbs overall. Olive oil is a gray area and I'd probably have you switch over to something even worse LOL like canola or corn oil, but that's at your discretion (I kept on eating butter when I got my DD and still got her anyway)

Also want to be sure you know that vegetables are free and unlimited meaning you do not count them. This means you have more calories to play around with than you think you do.

You actually can have 2 OR 3 meals, just do whichever works for you. I have a fast metabolism and I would keel over dead on 2 meals a day practically. I ate at 10:30/11 ish, then again at 4 pm, then again before bed. it's still a long fast and much different from how I usually ate, which is like a Hobbit, all day every day.

[atomic sagebrush]

The funny thing about the personality stuff is: no, there isn't, and trying to is worse than doing nothing.

When you take a step back it's clear that if the problem is being a bit of a detail oriented, high in control type of person, the solution is not to then launch a project to force yourself to change. It doesn't work, and in fact it's kind of chasing your tail really because trying to control your way into not being a control freak, is actually just an exercise in being a control freak (and that is in no way criticism, I'm right there with ya.)

What you have to do is cultivate (effortlessly and in a self-forgiving way) the idea that you are who you are and how you are and that is not going to change. You will control the aspects that are within your sphere of control, and let go of the stuff that isn't, to a higher power or to luck or the universe as per your belief system. Acknowledge that at the end of the day, it's out of your control what happens, and that is ok. No matter what, you cannot lose, either you get a daughter or another fabulous boy to love (and personally I think all boys should come in pairs like shoes, they thrive with brothers) and it's part of your life's journey, and no matter what the final outcome is you're going to be ok. It's not always gonna work, but even that you should jsut forgive yourself on. No matter what, it's not a disaster, and it's not the end of the world.

[maidentomother]

I'm sorry about your unpleasant experience! Cut offs seem sooo stressful to me.

I noticed earlier in this thread you mentioned eating oatmeal - that is a big no no as we believe oats sway blue. I strongly suggest avoiding them if possible. I love oats and have replaced them with rolled wheat, personally.

Good luck with the job opportunity!

[purple]

I think dropping the cut off would be a good idea if it stresses you out. One attempt at OPK+ or peak on the monitor would be a lot less stressful.

Good luck next month!!

[maidentomother]

Those are all fine in moderation! Glad you dropped the oatmeal.

[atomic sagebrush]

You absolutely SHOULD have applied for that job. Once in a lifetime stuff, you HAVE to go for that even when swaying. REmember you could lock yourself in a closet eating nothing but cranberries and rice cakes and still get a boy ANYWAY. DO NOT and I repeat do not let a life changing opportunity pass by for swaying.

I know I already said this but timing DOES NOT SWAY. Most of us on here hav 2-3-4 or more timing opposites. I have 4, 3 boys with cutoffs and a girl in Shettles boy timing. (and just think about all the people out there who would swear to you that timing works, but what happened to you this month actually happened to them!!) It just doesn't work and you can probably understand now in retrospect, tearing yourself up over something that doesn't even work anyway is not going to do your sway any favors. The amount of boy-makin' juju that comes from this worrying over timing is 10 billion times worse than your job application. Worrying over an amazing, once in a lifetime opportunity when you're doing this to yourself at the same time chasing a tactic that doesn't even work, it is time to take a step back and get your head right about what is happening here because I am worried for the fate of your sway if one little thing not going to plan is making you fall apart like this.

I honestly do not think you guys should try in February. I think you should take a month off and even consider high tech. I don't think you're ready to give up the cutoff because you need to give it up for the right reason (because you're ready to). If you really, really feel like you cannot handle another boy then high tech would be a better option. If that's not on the table, that's ok, but let's take February to catch our breath and regroup and you and I can go over some better ways to deal with these feelings and get it so you're feeling so great about your sway that a little early ovulation won't feel like the end of the world. March-May could possibly be more pink-friendly anyway so you may be helping yourself out by giving it another month.

[atomic sagebrush]

Thank you for catching that Maiden, fortunately I did stop eating oatmeal about a month ago. There are a few possibly questionable things I do still indulge in though: garbanzo beans, yogurt, corn chips, egg whites, peanut butter, or cookies. And in the morning, if I need something more than water, mint tea or diet soda I'll sometimes drink a low-sugar version of hot chocolate which has a bit of milk in it. (And just to be clear, I regularly also include a bit of canola oil or margarine in my vegetables, noodles, and popcorn.)

There are no magic foods that make boys or girls. You can absolutely eat all those foods and most people do.

1500-1800 cals, 40-50 g protein 30-60 g fat, you have the vegetable fats aspect covered already by using the canola oil/margarine. That is what matters. All those foods you mention can absolutely be part of a pink sway diet and I ate garbanzos (in hummus form mostly but lots of it), peanut butter, well heck I had all those things except egg whites, and that's because I did eat whole eggs now and then instead. You are doing fine on diet (may even not be eating ENOUGH). It's the other stuff we need to get ironed out.