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Thread: Hi IVF question

  1. #1
    Dream Newbie

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    Nov 2021
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    Hi IVF question

    I know some of you guys have gone the ivf route for gender selection and after they make and test the embryos what becomes of the remaining ones? If we did it I just couldn’t imagine not giving birth to them all. How many are usually “made”?

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  2. #2
    Swaying Advice Coach
    atomic sagebrush's Avatar
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    Dec 2010
    Eastern Washington State, USA
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    Many people have this fear going in to IVF and they end up being very surprised as they end up not with too many embryos, but not ENOUGH. People envision having 20 embryos left unused but that is really, really not the case in the vast majority of cases. Most folks end up with fewer than they think they will, particularly with PGD involved.

    Yes, occasionally some people do end up with some extras. Then you have a choice of donation to scientific research, giving them up for adoption to another couple, doing a "compassionate transfer" which is when they transplant the embryo at the wrong time of month to let it live out its normal lifespan in as natural an environment as possible, or leaving them on ice for a while to see how you feel about it in a couple years. Sometimes it's easier to walk away once they've been there a while. Other times you may decide to go ahead. We've had quite a few people end up going back for another of their desired gender even tho at the time they would have sworn they were only doing it once!!

    How you feel about any of those options is a very personal decision. There no right or wrong answer, you have to follow your heart. For me, even tho IVF wasn't an option financially, I felt that it wasn't for me regardless. I just KNEW I would be the gal who gets one embryo and transfers it even tho it wasn't my desired gender. People actually do that a fair bit, especially on their last cycle - they'd rather implant something than nothing and end up having spent a ton of money and getting an opposite anyway. I just knew in my gut that would be me, LOL!

    The number you end up with varies wildly from zero to five-ish or so. There are the people who may end up with more like eight sometimes but that's less common. Most of the people who I'm the most familiar with and have spent the most time with, end up with 1-3, and then that may or may not include their desired gender.
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