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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrsGoodies View Post
    Interaction with peers is overrated imho.

    The purpose of 'socialization' is to be able to function in society and interact with people from all walks of life and *all age groups*..... How placing thirty 6 yr olds into a classroom teaches them this is beyond me! Are other 6 yr olds going to train my child in etiquette and proper manners when they lack these basic skills themselves? Its like putting thirty puppies into a room and expecting them to potty train each other

    At least 100 yrs ago children were in 1 room school houses and learned to interact with all age groups. Now children are segregated by age until they are adults. They only do everything with their peers and are bullied by older groups and in turn bully younger groups.

    The only other place this happens in society other than schools are prisions.

    .
    I think the curriculum has advanced now though and requires more from the kids. By watching and imitating others, young children learn how to interact socially. They learn acceptable and unacceptable kinds of behavior. Not all 6 year olds behave badly. My son listens and is doing very well in school. He does, in fact, model what other students should act like. My daughter, however, needs to see what her peers are doing and I hope that she does learn from them. It is very important to see how a typical 9 year old behaves. I would never think of keeping her out of school and missing that social interaction.

    The biggest example, by far, that our kids have is how their parents behave individually and to each other and by watching their older siblings(if they have them). The home is where most behavior is learned and copied.

    And puppies will learn from one another, actually. So do cats. It's called socialization. They go through an imprinting stage from 8-12 weeks and what happens during that time will determine how their temperament and how they react to things. So, socialization for our 4-legged friends is just as important. The analogy you use would not be appropriate because someone does have to learn what is appropriate behavior before others can be taught. There is usually a leader or two in the class. The rest can learn by example if they so choose.
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  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by nuthinbutpink View Post

    And puppies will learn from one another, actually. So do cats. It's called socialization. They go through an imprinting stage from 8-12 weeks and what happens during that time will determine how their temperament and how they react to things. So, socialization for our 4-legged friends is just as important. The analogy you use would not be appropriate because someone does have to learn what is appropriate behavior before others can be taught. There is usually a leader or two in the class. The rest can learn by example if they so choose.
    I was referring to puppy school actually where every puppy is with their handler and learns basic etiquette such as following beside while walking, keeping pace, not pulling on the leash, coming when called, and other basic comands.

    puppies would never naturally learn this from each other.



    If you see a well-behaved 9yr old, it is because that 9 yr old is immitating an ADULT - not typical 9 yr old behaviour.

    For example: you observe a child in a restaurant shuffling in their seat, screaming/giggling/talking loudly, making spitballs with the napkin, teasing siblings, whining, being rude/ignoring the server, .....this child is displaying perfectly normal childish behavior.

    Then you observe a child sitting quietly in a restaurant, eating with a knife & fork, speaking in quiet tones, saying please & thank you to the waitress....that child is immitating what an adult would do.

    If you then point to the well behaved child and say to your own child "see that girl/boy sitting quietly over there? You need to behave like that" what you are really saying is "that child can behave like an adult so you can too"

    My children have never learned proper etiquette from their peers...ever. Yes, they can mimick each other but I want them to learn how ADULTS behave and interact with each other. I spend a lot of time correcting inappropriate behavior and "but so-and-so does it so why can't I?" more than anything.

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by 1moregirl View Post
    So MrsG - do you homeschool your boys as well then? Still waiting for answers to some of my questions. How can you earn an income whilst homeschooling? What if your kids enjoy school (mind do, especially one of them)? I'd love to hear some answers and get some ideas and suggestions. I Am a fully trained and qualified primary school teacher yet I'm not keen on going back to that anyway and spending time with other people's kids when I'd rather be with my own. My two kids currently go to a catholic school and it's been a great school. I just really miss them when they are at school and wonder why we all have to follow the educational convention of sending our kids off to school. I'd love to a have a huose with quite a bit of land and quite a few animals as well, a huge veggie garden and homeschool the kids and have them helping indoors and outdoors whilst learning stuff as well at the same time. I don't know. I'm a typical Libran. Always in two minds about things. In 2 minds about ttc and about the educations of our kids.
    I think as their mother, you know your child best.

    Every situation school or homeschool has pros & cons. The negatives of school are primarily social/mental whilst the homeschool negatives are mainly financial.

    Jobs that can be done at home would be

    *bookkeeper
    * consulting
    * day trading (if you are financially minded)

    You could also work PT on evenings and weekends.

    If a child really liked school, (which is a lie...they like their friends, playing a recess etc...never the actual schoolwork itself) then you should just ask them.

    Basically, if they had a choice would they rather spend a couple hrs in the morning doing schoolwork at home and having the afternoon free for themselves....or spend an entire day at school?

    Only you can decide what is right for you and your children. My only point being that if you do choose to send them to school, 'learning to socialize' shouldn't be one of the reasons since far superior socialization skills would be learned and taught at home..
    Last edited by MrsGoodies; January 14th, 2017 at 01:03 PM.

  5. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by 1moregirl View Post
    Wow! That is really interesting! Did any one of you have parents, family members and/or friends that questioned you about homeschooling or gave you negative opinions about it? My parents, for one, would be totally against it and would say they believed I was keeping them at home for my own selfish reasons. Plus, my other question for you that concerns me, is how do you yourselves earn an income if you are at home every day homeschooling your kids? I am a trained primary school teacher, yet I dread the thought of teaching other people's kids every day when I would much rather just be with my own. I really need to be earning money, yet I'm not sure how I could do that whilst homeschooling our kids as well. Any ideas? Plus, I question my own motives for wanting to homeschool. Am I wanting it just so my kids are staying home with me every day? Maybe this is not a good thing in that the kids and I would be too dependent on each other? How will you guys cope as Mums one day when yuor kids are all grown up and move out? I just don't know. I am in two minds really. I am worried I am wanting it for selfish reasons, since I am sad my 'baby' is heading off to 4 yr old kinder this year. I won't have any more babies at home to take care, or to keep my company every day. I do have one sister who would also love to homeschool her kids but she sends them to Steiner school instead. Anyway, I will look into it a bit more online and just see. Atomic - how did you go homeschooling your boys through VCE (secondary school and years 11 and 12)? I also worry that we would go stir crazy being in our own huose so much if I was homeschooling our kids and that they wouldn't get as much time to interact with peers.
    Yes, people tell me it's a bad idea all along and always have. But they had no qualms about sending me to public school to be mocked and ridiculed for 13 years, so it was easy enough for me to ignore it.

    I (perhaps obviously) earn an income on here now (and am so very thankful to be able to do that). Prior to that, my husband and I ran a business we would actually take our older sons to while we worked and they did most of their school there. I also worked at a dog kennel near our house for a couple years in the mornings, and then did school in the afternoon when I got home. Boys were older then and more able to do their work on their own.

    My older sons ARE already grown and moved out. It was very difficult at first but has gotten easier over time. I do believe, based on what I've observed from my MIL, stepmother, and my own mom, that we get to a certain age and it's easier to let the kids go off to do their own thing. The older ladies I know seem very happy traveling, going out to lunch, doing their own thing with hobbies and stuff. I suspect it may be a natural progression as we get older where at some point we enjoy having that time for ourselves.

    My sons did high school type classes as they got older and then they took a test we have in the US that gives them the equivalent of a high school diploma. Then my older son went on to college (took tests and stuff for that.) My younger son is working and saving money to go to a trade school - he's always been less studious than my older son.

    They don't get as much time to interact with peers. Some people think this is more important than others. My older sons, like I mentioned, we lived in town then and they had plenty of interaction. My younger kids, we're going to have to make more of an effort with like I said. But they all seem perfectly normal - when we get together with other people, they aren't shy or weird or anything. I was def. painfully shy and weird as a kid and I went to public school. to some extent may just be the individual child.
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  6. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by 1moregirl View Post
    So MrsG - do you homeschool your boys as well then? Still waiting for answers to some of my questions. How can you earn an income whilst homeschooling? What if your kids enjoy school (mind do, especially one of them)? I'd love to hear some answers and get some ideas and suggestions. I Am a fully trained and qualified primary school teacher yet I'm not keen on going back to that anyway and spending time with other people's kids when I'd rather be with my own. My two kids currently go to a catholic school and it's been a great school. I just really miss them when they are at school and wonder why we all have to follow the educational convention of sending our kids off to school. I'd love to a have a huose with quite a bit of land and quite a few animals as well, a huge veggie garden and homeschool the kids and have them helping indoors and outdoors whilst learning stuff as well at the same time. I don't know. I'm a typical Libran. Always in two minds about things. In 2 minds about ttc and about the educations of our kids.
    If my kids enjoyed school, I'd have a hard time pulling them out. Personally, I hated it, and my kids have never gone to school and I don't know what their reactions might be. I do know that they like having the free time that they wouldn't otherwise.

    I am lucky that I do have land and garden and hopefully this next year, we'll be getting animals. But I actually think that in a city is a superior place to homeschool because you can do the co-ops and activities - libraries, museums, etc. Being in the country can actually make it a bit harder than in the city.
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  7. #16
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    I home educated my first from k4 through 7th grade. I was a sahm (worked part time jobs a lot though) until he was 9 and his dad decided after 10yrs of cheating on me that he wanted to be free of me and so i had to go to work full time....still home educated my boy though as he stayed with my mom while i was at work and i left him assignments and we went over them, learned something new, and gave "homework" for the next day when i got off work. When he was 10.75 i remarried and inquired via the local police if he could stay home alone while i worked and it was ok to do... i worked 4am till noon so we did schoolwork together after lunch. Then came "jr high" and i was pregnant, working full time, taking a full load of college courses and home educating ... my son started slacking off and i was unable to make him do his work....then little bro was born and even though i loved my accounts payable job i had promised my new husband before we ever even got married that i would stay home with any kids we were blessed with (because i had been told 8 yrs prior i may never have another child so i figured it was a moot point) ... so now i was home with a high needs newborn and trying to home educate my oldest who was still refusing to do his work, he said he was doing his assignments but at test time would break down and admit he had not done anything.... so for 8th grade he was sent to a Christian school... he is there this yr too for 9th grade although i have no fear about teaching high school as i am a 4.0 gpa student even in college and hey i can read and learn with him if need be or find a tutor or co-op class etc lots of options. Now he has decided that next yr he would like to try online schooling and i am thrilled to have him home again and i am ok with some online teacher making sure he gets his work done.
    But yes, sometimes in order to be a homeschooling mom you might have to put your own career on the back burner....but with every choice, the career world will always be out there and lots of people can do the job, but your children are only at home with you under your influence for a short while. I have to remind myself of a quote i heard long ago, "women can have it all, just not all at the same time." Because like i said, i really loved my job but have been given a new assignment for the time being

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    I hear you skillet,

    Getting jr high boys to do school work is frustrating for me too!

    My son avoids English & science like the plague....too much reading he says....i struggle to motivate him....all he likes to do is sports & video games (if he could get a job doing this problem solved, right?)

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    Fascinating conversation guys...I have always thought that homeschooling would be superior; it's just the money and time that's the issue. A lot of the newer private schools around here, such as Khan Lab School and AltSchool are trending in the direction of what homeschooling is like (more individual and self-paced). I'm planning on sending my kid(s) to a bilingual school. A second language is something I can't provide by myself. We plan to supplement the school math curriculum as neither of us are impressed by the math at schools around here (and we grew up here!).
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    Good idea Amelia...i supplement math also.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 1moregirl View Post
    Wow! That is really interesting! Did any one of you have parents, family members and/or friends that questioned you about homeschooling or gave you negative opinions about it? My parents, for one, would be totally against it and would say they believed I was keeping them at home for my own selfish reasons. Plus, my other question for you that concerns me, is how do you yourselves earn an income if you are at home every day homeschooling your kids? I am a trained primary school teacher, yet I dread the thought of teaching other people's kids every day when I would much rather just be with my own. I really need to be earning money, yet I'm not sure how I could do that whilst homeschooling our kids as well. Any ideas? Plus, I question my own motives for wanting to homeschool. Am I wanting it just so my kids are staying home with me every day? Maybe this is not a good thing in that the kids and I would be too dependent on each other? How will you guys cope as Mums one day when yuor kids are all grown up and move out? I just don't know. I am in two minds really. I am worried I am wanting it for selfish reasons, since I am sad my 'baby' is heading off to 4 yr old kinder this year. I won't have any more babies at home to take care, or to keep my company every day. I do have one sister who would also love to homeschool her kids but she sends them to Steiner school instead. Anyway, I will look into it a bit more online and just see. Atomic - how did you go homeschooling your boys through VCE (secondary school and years 11 and 12)? I also worry that we would go stir crazy being in our own huose so much if I was homeschooling our kids and that they wouldn't get as much time to interact with peers.
    My family doesn't know. I'm not close to almost anyone these days (sadly) and when my mom asks about school, I'm honest and tell her what progress she's made, but she has no clue its all at home LOL. She wouldn't support it.

    My brother knows and he supports it, so does my best friend.

    You have to learn to pick your battles. I married out of my culture and changed my religion when I was 19, and that is when I decided I wasn't going to live my life based on ANYONE'S opinion. The marriage didn't work out and everyone was like "I told you so" but I continued what I started and eventually found somebody else and am finally getting to make the life I wanted for myself.

    You have a profession, and you can use that from home. One of my clients is a teacher and recently started to homeschool her children AND got a work from home position teaching.

    Personally, homeschooling makes it easier for me to have a career. I became a holistic practitioner after 7 years of studying and personal experience and I have been coaching for 3 years now. I took a break from coaching very recently and am now focusing on content (blog & podcast), in the meantime I'm TTC and plan to have a large family (God willing), so naturally my career will take a turn.It is quite exciting.

    The majority of leaders, game changers and important folks in history have been home schooled, check out this website which lists everyone by profession: Famous Homeschoolers - Famous Homeschool Parents - Homeschooled Entrepreneurs

    Even Elon Musk, owner of Tesla Motors and SpaceX pulled his kids out of the most prestigious private school in California to homeschool them and now provides a homeschool environment for the children of SpaceX workers.

    So it isn't some new age hippy trend as many people like to think sending kids off to an institutionalized school system is very recent. Food for thought.
    Last edited by cosmosis; January 15th, 2017 at 07:08 AM.
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