Hello! New pink sway attemptee here

[Lilly~24]

Hello, first of all I just want to say thank you to the people that maintain this site. Looking into the world of trying to influence baby gender in any way was so confusing. Different places would say different things and almost none have anything to back it up. Should I be trying to eat foods to make my body more acidic (seemed a little silly because the foods we eat surely cannot influence acidity *that* much anyway), high dairy (but again some sites make it sound like you should be having 4000+ calories of milk, cream and cheese basically) and much more that just did not seem to make sense to me and also seemed very hard to stick to.

Anyway, after having 3 boys I am really hoping to finally get a baby girl to add to our family.

We hope to start TTC around feb next year but want to get started on the diet now. I have quite a bit of weight to lose and think I read that 12 weeks before is a good time period to start.

Just a few questions though, I have tried reading but with sooo much information spanning so many years I cannot seem to find exact answers.

1) Alcohol is recommended but for how long? I do not drink at all currently and have not for 11 years but I am perfectly happy to add in a glass of wine or something with my evening meal (seems red has quite a few other benefits anyway!) but I am a little confused on whether I should start that now and continue until a positive test and if so how much is the ideal amount?

2) Coffee - similar to above, should I start adding this into my diet now? I don't like black coffee at all and when I have it I usually have to have condensed milk and/or creamer, a habit I will have to get over! lol

3) For hubby, I read that jogging or cycling are some of the best things he should do, followed my a warm shower. If this best done just before the attempt or consistently to reduce the quality of his sperm?

4) With regards to exercise, I read a thread where it was said to do 60 minutes 4-7 days a week or it is best not to do anything. I have hip issues from my previous pregnancies and am expecting to have severe pelvic girdle pain again next pregnancy (for me it has been getting worse each time to the point I was basically bed ridden the last couple of months of 3rd pregnancy) so cannot do 60 minutes or heavy exercise but would like to do some gentle exercise to help overall unless that would negatively affect the sway?

5) Fiber capsules, folate supplements, coffee 2-3 cups a day, alcohol 1-2 drinks 4-7 days a week, 1500-1800 calories a day avoiding dairy and red meats as much as possible (and garlic/onions?) - Am I missing something important?

6) I have more than 30lb to lose and am mildly insulin resistant, feeling sick and dizzy if I go too long without food and often craving sugar, should I try the LE and if that makes me feel bad go for alternate or just start with the alternate/PCOS diet version straight away?

Oh also it seems that clomid or femara would be a good thing to look into but these are only for right around TTC and not something to worry about this early right?


Sorry for being so long, so confused and while DH is very supportive, I do not have and female support in my life really and want to make sure I am doing this correct.


Thank you so much again. I hope everyone reading is having a good start to the week!

[ObsidianBlossom]

There are some good questions, I’m no expert but I’ll be following your thread to see what the experts say. Atomic is fantastic at what she does on here, and am sure there are other ladies who have a similar wealth of knowledge on here.

As far as I am aware it’s all or nothing with the exercise and adding coffee and alcohol is something I’m adding to my sway. I’m sure you’ll have some answers very soon. They are very efficient and helpful on this site x



Mummy to a DS and DD - swaying pink for no.3

[Lilly~24]

Oh yes I am amazed by all the essays and information on here. Its such a breath of fresh air for people to be able to back up WHY they say something as well as change if the current thinking is wrong but on the downside there is just so much information I am feeling a bit panicky and overwhelmed... now reading more threads and seeing more and more about how DH being vegan or eating a similar kind of diet also helps (he really does not like veg unless they're covered in cheese and in between meat and bread!) and also paranoid that my weight will prevent me or extremely lower my chance of even being able to have a girl. Both DH and I are overweight to the point it seems to affect AF (before I got pregnant with my 3rd I had not had AF come visit for 4 months prior to the cycle I got pregnant on) but not fertility, or at least I got a BFP after only one night completely by accident not even thinking it would happen with such irregular cycles. I weigh a bit less than that now and DH does not want to wait any longer than feb/march to start TTC

[Kkmommy2sons]

You are asking questions I have! I spent the last year researching old sway tactics. Now I get the diet part, I can skip breakfast but my question is coffee! Can I drink 2 morning cups of coffee to help me not eat until 12-1pm? Coffee I usually drink is with soy creamer but I will switch to whatever is recommended. Also fiber. How does this sway? I was going to get cranberry until I spent the last 2 days reading new advice. We want to try in December.

[atomic sagebrush]

Yep, you called it - the foods we eat actually can't really affect our body's acidity. Our food first goes into our stomachs where the pH is incredibly low (lower than any food we could ever eat) and then into our intestines where that acidity is totally neutralized. And our body's pH cannot go out of a very narrow, normal range anyway (if it does, you will die!) The science just doesn't back up the acid alkaline diets. I have a longer piece about that here https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum...ph-pickle.html

I have a more indepth bit about the mineral balancing diets here: https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum...s-edition.html but long story short, yes that sky high dairy intake is basically a recipe for another boy. When I was back on that type of site (when I was only just starting to do research) I found that the people who ate the massive amounts of food were the ones who got boy opposites. There were people having a gallon of milk a day, 12 eggs, tahini and jelly sandwiches on homemade bread, etc. And they got the boys (as did people who just ate their normal diets and cut out sodium and took calcium supps). Then there were people who ate very lightly becasue they hated the diet...this was before I created the LE Diet so no one was trying to do that yet - and their sways were more likely to succeed. And then the Oxford study was done that found moms who ate the most nutrients had the most boys. So I can't ever recommend the sky high dairy intake for anyone. If you do believe in the minerals, take cal-mag supps without added vit. D.

1)Alcohol - any more than you were having is great. 1 a day is plenty. Most give this up at ovulation and don't continue drinking till BFP. Whatever alcohol you like.

2)YOu can have creamer or milk in your coffee. We allow that. Just no sweetener other than artificial sweetener. 1-3 cups a day is what most do.

To answer both 1 and 2 above, as far in advance of your sway, just like the time on diet. We don't KNOW that is necessary but I think it's a solid guideline. If you can't, then hold off for now but I feel it's likely similar to diet in how it works.

3)Studies have found the jogging and biking, more is better for pink. So I doubt it is adequate to only do that before BD. It needs to be ongoing if at all possible. Hot shower probably does very little and it's fine to do it beforehand.

4)You need to do whatever exercise you need to do. Your health and wellbeing must outweigh the sway and you need to be fit for your upcoming pregnancy. The good news is, even walking helps so if you could even do something less strenuous that would work. We have found the 60 minutes to matter more than the days per week but it's sounding to me like you couldn't even do the 60 min for 3x a week? Just do what you can, then. Exercise can sway pink at any level (or at the least, not sway blue!) provided you have lost at least a little weight on a lower protein diet. I don't have as much faith in it at the lower level (which is why I recommend the higher amount) but as long as you've got the weight loss and diet elements covered, less exercise is ok for those who need it for heath reasons.

5)You don't have to avoid dairy (or even red meat) as long as you stick in the limits for the day. We avoid red meat and garlic because they're easy enough to avoid, but really it's fine in the limits, there are no forbidden foods on LE Diet.

Do also be sure you are getting in the 40-50 g protein and 30-60 g fat in there. ETA - scratch that, since you need the alternate diet please up these limits to 50-60 g protein and fat!

The main reason to limit meat is because it makes it easier to stick in the limits if you do. Since meat is high protien and lower cal, if you eat a lot of it, you quickly go over on protein and have only eaten a few hundred calories. Since dairy, grain, legumes, nuts, etc all have protein in them, if you have no protein to "spend" it becomes very tough to get adequate calories and fat if you're overly focused on meat. It ends up devolving into a starvation diet of chicken and cucumbers and gummy worms and not the kind of balanced pre-pregnancy diet that LE is really designed to be (while still cutting back on nutrients overall and swyaing pink, of course)

6)I want you on alternate diet. We have been actually getting superior results with the alternate diet anyway - I'd use it for everyone and see if it worked for everyone equally, but the problem is that it's very expensive and many people would lose too much weight on the alt LE Diet. But anyone who can use it, SHOULD both for their health and for their sway.

Yes Clomid or Femara if you can get them but if you can't, no worries, you can get a girl without them! I did.

[atomic sagebrush]

There are some good questions, I’m no expert but I’ll be following your thread to see what the experts say. Atomic is fantastic at what she does on here, and am sure there are other ladies who have a similar wealth of knowledge on here.

As far as I am aware it’s all or nothing with the exercise and adding coffee and alcohol is something I’m adding to my sway. I’m sure you’ll have some answers very soon. They are very efficient and helpful on this site x



Mummy to a DS and DD - swaying pink for no.3

Exercise has been such good results that over time I"ve allowed more and more people to do it even if they couldn't get up to the full amount. We have still gotten good results even with less exercise (although I still think more is better)

And anyone on the alternate diet MUST exercise even if they cannot get up to the full amount. For people with insulin resistance issues the benefits to blood sugar control and weight loss are so great that they outweigh any "risk" (using air quotes since the "risk" was always entirely theoretical and never proven at all anyway) from possibly building muscle mass.

The important thing is, when doing the moderate exercise, to please be losing or ahve lost at least a little weight while folllowing a low protein diet. When losing weight on a lower protein diet you literally cannot be adding muscle mass and the "risk" (again which was totally theoretical) of adding muscle possibly swaying blue is mitigated

[atomic sagebrush]

Oh yes I am amazed by all the essays and information on here. Its such a breath of fresh air for people to be able to back up WHY they say something as well as change if the current thinking is wrong but on the downside there is just so much information I am feeling a bit panicky and overwhelmed... now reading more threads and seeing more and more about how DH being vegan or eating a similar kind of diet also helps (he really does not like veg unless they're covered in cheese and in between meat and bread!) and also paranoid that my weight will prevent me or extremely lower my chance of even being able to have a girl. Both DH and I are overweight to the point it seems to affect AF (before I got pregnant with my 3rd I had not had AF come visit for 4 months prior to the cycle I got pregnant on) but not fertility, or at least I got a BFP after only one night completely by accident not even thinking it would happen with such irregular cycles. I weigh a bit less than that now and DH does not want to wait any longer than feb/march to start TTC

Being slightly overweight is the ideal place to start LE Diet. People who are thin to start with have a much harder time of it since they have to take so much care not to lose weight too quickly. You're good to go!

Most of our husbands (mine included) would do absolutely nothing to sway. Few husbands have gone vegetarian and even fewer have gone vegan! It is our diets that matter by far and away the most because we are the ones who will carry that baby for 9 months and then raise it for another 18-36 months in our environment with access to our food resources (and it is that message we've sent to our bodies about access to food resources that "tells" our body what gender has the best shot of surviving to adulthood to pass down genes to future generations!)

[atomic sagebrush]

You are asking questions I have! I spent the last year researching old sway tactics. Now I get the diet part, I can skip breakfast but my question is coffee! Can I drink 2 morning cups of coffee to help me not eat until 12-1pm? Coffee I usually drink is with soy creamer but I will switch to whatever is recommended. Also fiber. How does this sway? I was going to get cranberry until I spent the last 2 days reading new advice. We want to try in December.

Yes you can have coffee in the morning as long as you don't ahve any sugar in it. Creamer or milk is ok (as long as creamer is not sugar sweetened)

I would not bother with cranberry. It has not worked at all and I do not find it to be acceptibly safe (explanation here): https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum...echniques.html

[Lilly~24]

Thank you so so much for your in depth reply atomic sagebrush.

I will try out walking slowly then and perhaps do it every other day initially and see if i can make the 60 minutes. I don't know if I can but as long as I follow what my body is saying and don't over do it then it should even help. I was worried that I would have to do more strenuous exercise, which just isn't going to happen without damage right now.

I'm not really a big fan of taking a ton of supplements so I'd prefer not to take ca and mg

Looking at the alternate diet it is recommended to have 3/4 cup of whole milk every day so hopefully that and perhaps artificial sweeteners can make the coffee more palatable if I split the milk up over a couple of cups of coffee.

Yesterday I was reading a thread where it was mentioned that you had told someone that spirits are slightly better than wine/beer in terms of alcohol? So perhaps a shot or two of a spirit may be better in terms of both calories and because I don't like wine unless its sparkling rose!

My DH is actually up for joining me on the diet with modifications (I don't think he could completely give up everything). He's wanting to lose weight and has issues where a lot of sugar in his diet causes skin issues. We both are food junkies and I always seem to be hungry no matter what I do/eat so just trying to be positive about being able to do it rather than allowing thoughts of "there's just no way I can, I'll be too hungry and miserable". I know a large part of things is your mental attitude to it and since this is quite likely my last attempt naturally I just have to hold on to doing everything I can.

Looking around there seems to be places I can order clomid and femara so will be looking into that, which one would you recommend if both are available to me?

I had also read with folate about taking smaller amounts throughout the day but had been looking at a brand that has you take one (1000 microgram) capsule per day rather than split up. Would this be ok? Should I take more than one or look for another that is smaller doses per capsule.

Does type of fiber matter? Some are psyllium husk while some purposefully say they are not

I'm so sorry for taking up your time

[atomic sagebrush]

just please keep in mind what I wrote above, even if you can't get that much exercise it is still indicated for you and you should still do it just being sure to have lost at least a little weight on a lower protein diet.

yes a serving of full fat dairy a day can go a long way towards making coffee tolerable.

Re spirits - my point in what I wrote in that other thread was that NO sample size on the alcohol is large enough to even matter. It is all but 100% proven in my mind that all alcohol sways pink and everyone should have whatever they like. Sparkling rose wine is ok too if you prefer that.

great that hubby is supportive! For him, as long as he loses more than say 5-10 lbs it will help the sway. Very small weight losses may sway blue by temporarily raising his testosterone (although we really don't even know if that matters!)

I can't do any recommendations for ordering online for liability reasons. Overall if you're under 38 or so I think Clomid is better, Femara for women older than that

Yes the 1000 mcg folate is ok too. It's just better absorbed in smaller amounts over the course of the day.

Whatever fiber you can easily come by. We have not found type of fiber to make any difference so whichever kind you can get the easiest (without having to special order, that kind of thing) is fine.