Has anyone ever had a 3rd trimester loss?

[sweetpea]

We lost one of our twins at 37 weeks just this past May. It's been 7 weeks since the delivery, and I'm still struggling a lot with this. I'm such a crazy mess of emotions, given that my daughter was born alive and healthy, but my son was stillborn. Here I was, thinking I was doing great by carrying twins all the way to 37 weeks...only to lose one in the end.

Has anyone else ever had a late term loss? Not that I would ever wish a loss at any stage on anyone, but I just feel so alone.

[XXPlease]

I'm so sorry for your loss! I knew someone while growing up who lost her daughter at 8 months along and her daughter was perfect healthy the umbilical cord got kinked so she was still born it has been 14 years since her daughter passed and she still thinks about her she did go on to have boy/girl twins within a year after her daughters passing I know she had a very hard time with the loss though I hope you will be able to find some peace knowing you will see your baby boy again someday!

[Wanting-a-girl]

I also know someone who lost a daughter at 39 weeks due to a cord accident

I'm so sorry for your loss and hope that you ave lots of emotional support...

[Rainbow baby]

I am so sorry about your little guy sweetpea. Unfortunately you're not alone. I am in a support group and there are many many ladies joining everyday it breaks my heart! I lost my little guy just under 20 weeks and it is so so hard it has been a year for me and I am still not ok about it. It is really hard in the first several months after, nobody can do or say the right things, take advantage of the support you have been offered, and if you are not coping a psychologist can help your thoughts and emotions. I was so against seeing one I was too proud but since I have started I am feeling much better and enjoying life and I can think about my son with a smile on my face and not the heavy hearted guilt. He will always be apart of you and your family. You did do great carrying twins to 37 weeks is perfect you couldn't have done any better for your babies it isn't your fault or anything you did or didn't do. My thoughts are with you, be kind on yourself you have a hard road ahead having to grieve and celebrate at the same time must be so so confusing <3

[eenymeeny]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I have a friend who lost her first baby at 39 weeks due to a blood clot in the placenta. Another lost a twin at 28 weeks. I know her emotions were very complicated as she was so happy about the one twin surviving whilst grieving for her other baby dying. Plus people's reactions tended to be 'at least you still have one' which of course is absolutely not helpful when you are grieving for your baby. She finds birthdays a little easier each year but they are still bittersweet. She remembers her lost daughter every birthday with a gesture whilst trying not to dampen the mood of her living daughters birthday.

Please seek support if you feel you need it and remember that this is a huge loss and there is no deadline as to when you should be 'over' it or have moved on. Be gentle on yourself.

[ThreeMenAndALAdy]

I know 3 women who had late losses. One was pregnant with twin girls and lost both of them at 34 weeks. My other 2 friends lost their babies at 35 and 36 weeks. It's absolutely horrible. I'm so sorry this happened to you.

[sbowman]

I'm so sorry Sweetpea. I agree with everything Rainbow said. Therapy has helped me tremendously, and I went on zoloft for a while. It wasn't ideal but I think it helped keep my emotions from being so wild all the time, so maybe that is something to consider. It's been 8 months fir me. I never stop thinking about him and how it feels like there's someone missing from our lives...should be two car seats in my backseat, and I should have my DS in a double stroller with his brother. It gets easier to deal with it, although I don't think the pain will ever cease. It's like a piece of my heart is gone.

Just hope you know you're not alone. It's hard but you will get through this.


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[The Anchor]

Oh sweetpea, I am so so sorry for your loss. My heart is breaking for you, HUGS.

[1+2+3boys]

I'm so sorry to hear that! xo It's such a horrendous thing to hear about. My friend lost her girl twin at 35 weeks and the surviving boy twin is now 5 and she thinks of her little girl every day. The hard thing about losing a twin is seeing their surviving twin and having an image of what you are missing out on with your lost child. Hugs to you. I think there are support pages or groups on facebook and other websites. Search 'twin loss' no one can understand quite like someone who has been through it.

Congratulations on your babies and I hope the one you got to keep is healthy and doing well