Chat Thread for those Mummies that have HAD or want to HAVE a HOME BIRTH

[Mum23boys]

I DONT WANT TO BE RUDE BUT CAN I PLEASE ASK IF THAT YOU ARE "AGAINST" HOME BIRTH PLEASE DO NOT POST ON HERE.
This is a thread meant for those of us who intend ( unless nature dictates otherwise ) to have our babies at home not in the Hospital.
It is a very sensitive subject and I know not everyone agrees and so this thread is for me to talk to other like minded mums about my desire for another homebirth not to argue why of if its any better than a hospital.
Look forward to chatting to you all :-)

[Mum23boys]

So I will start us all off.

DS1 was an ECS - I went in to be induced at 10 days overdue ( first baby very nieve - didnt know about the risks just wanted my baby out , WAS BORED OF BEING PREGNANT ETC) Inductions went wrong - I hyperstimulated and had a bad reaction to the drug used to induce me and ended up needing a c section, cut me open and spinal wore off so ended up being a crash c section with me being put to sleep and not seeing or holding my baby for 4 hours after he was born as I was too ill. I then had a heameorage and had to have a blood transfusion, caught a bowel and bladder infection and ended up in hospital fro 10 days - Not a great experience at all and reallY made me look deeper into induction. Now its not something id consider. ( personal choice !)

DS 2 - I wanted a homebirth but after being classed as high risk the hospital were completely against it and my consultant was a bitch !!! I ended up not going to her appointments and just seeing my midwife instead. DH was also against homebirth he refused point blank to let me do it and was so adament and scared that in the end after lots of tears we booked a meeting with the hospital and i said the only way id go in was if i could use the low risk birth area where they had a pool etc and so they agreed and I had ds 2 6 days early at the low risk birth area - normal natural no drug birth - perfect - apart from hubby being sent home after visiting hours an hour after baby was born and as it was night me being kept in on a noisy ward with lots of screaming babies while ellis wanted to sleep through - i went home wrecked !!!!

DS 3 - Again they were against it - Yet this time i was NOT backing down - not for them not even for DH - I told him in no uncertain terms this one was being born at home whether he liked it or not and if it meant me sneaking off to have it in the bathroom i would ( obviously i wouldnt but i just wanted him to think i would !! ) Anyhow i wrote a latter to the hospital basically saying if something went wrong and they hadnt sent a midwife to me to help with my homebirth then id hold them responsible - great draft letter i got off the homebirth.org website. They suddenly were all as nice as pie to me - i mentioned staff shortages not being my problem and that i was aware they had the means to use bank staff etc - made out i knew all the loop holes when in fact i had no clue !!
A midwife came to talk to us about the risks and luckily for me she was the only midwife locally ive met that loved homebirths - she ran us through everything ( that i already knew ) and really put dh mind at ease ( i think he needed to hear all the things id been telling him about how safe it was from a expert- someone in the field as it were ) and she actually bigged it up so much he seemed OK with the idea when she left..
Anyhow homebirth happened ( i was late again but refused induction just went in for daily monitoring ) and it was amazing - drug free and laboured in my birth pool with dh next to me.

To this day DH talks about it to any of his friends that are expecting - he is like a real advocate for homebirth now - always saying how amazing it was - that he wishes he hadnt felt the way he did before so that ds2 could have been born at home too.( I think he just loved that after birth we were all in bed together with a pizza and movie just cuddling - where as with hospital he was sent home alone to look after the other kids himself !! ) ha ha

Obviously IF we are lucky to get pregnant again this year r next our next baby will too hopefully be born at home.

[Jadis]

Thanks for starting this thread, Mum23Boys! I'm so excited to speak to other homebirthing gals. My DS1's arrival was a typical hospital birth. When I got there in active labour, the nurses strongly suggested that I get an epidural. "No need to be a hero" they'd said. They had to do the epidural twice as the first one didn't take properly. The epidural made me comfortable but also slowed my labour down My baby's heart rate dipped a bit and they gave me an episiotomy (without discussion or consent) and hauled him out with forceps. They suctioned him and handed him to me but I was still in shock from my nasty birth experience...it took a couple of hours for me to feel like myself again. When I got pregnant again, I knew I wanted a very different experience so I did my research. I used midwives instead of OB/GYN's and opened my mind to a homebirth. At first, my DH was dead set against it but my midwife gave him a good education and he came around. Now, he says it was the perfect decision for us. DS2 was a homebirth in a pool in my bedroom. When all was said and done, I got to snuggle in my own big bed with my own sheets and towels, surrounded by my family. Sure beat the hospital and I never felt unsafe at home, I knew I was in good hands with my midwives and that if they spotted anything dodgy, they'd have transferred me to a hospital in the blink of an eye. If all goes to plan with this pregnancy, I'll be having another homebirth!

[aroundtheworld]

Gonna copy and paste from the former thread:

My first child was born in the hospital and it was very typical; stadol, epidural, coached pushing on my back, etc, etc. Thankfully, my daughter was born healthy.

My second child was born in the hospital after laboring at home with my doula until 8 centimeters. I basically went to the hospital and pushed him out for insurance purposes (no medications, no interventions).

My third and fourth children were born in the comfort of my bedroom, with a midwife in attendance, in three hours or less from first contraction to last. I am a very fast laborer.

I am now pregnant with my 5th child and plan to have another homebirth. Unless forced for one reason or another, I won't go back to the hospital for any future births because I am most comfortable and happy at home.

[Mum23boys]

aroundtheworld I love that your a doula - My dream is to be a midwife but there is no way i could afford to study for as long as is needed so i did think about becoming a doula perhaps when Im done having all my babies (this 4th baby we are ttc will be the last ). I had a doula for my last birth and she was amazing - it was strange cos i felt in control while she was there - i felt like i had to be strong in front of a stranger ( even though really she wasnt) where as with just fqmily id have been a blubbering wreck - she really kept me focused and if i get pregnant again and get my homebirth I will be hiring her again.

PS for those of you that havent thought about a doula - its fantastic - At first i thought it would be strange having a stranger at my birth but i got to know sam through the last 6 months of my pregnancies - she listened to what i wanted and was the one on the day to tell the midwives what i wanted - make sure they followed it etc - for example i remember before baby was born she reminded james to get involved she kept telling the midwives he wanted to tell me the sex, that we wanted to wait to have the cord cut - all the things at the time i wouldnt have remembered to mention and then been gutted about after ( we all know they read our birth plans but never really adhere to them apart from where legally necessary ) Sam kept me going through it all - at one point i was asking for pain relief and id said to her before hand no matter how much i beg dot give into me and sure enough the midwives were quick enough to hand it over but sam pulled the gas and air away and reminded me i didnt need it id hate myself after etc and Im so glad she did.

Anyway sorry to waffle but really guys you should look into it they are amazing people. There are also grants i believe for those that cant afford their services but despertaly want them.

[Jadis]

I had a doula with my last birth, she was wonderful. That said, I don't think we can afford to get a doula this time around I'm hoping that my husband and midwives will be all the support I need.

[Mum23boys]

I know training doulas can accept donations up to £150 if thats a help. x

[suregena]

I attempted a birth center birth with my son. He was posterior and I got to 7cm and there was some water (waters hadn't broken still) between his head and the bag, and they needed to break the water so I could dilate more (I stalled for like two hours.) Unfortunately, because there was water between his head and the edge of the bag, they weren't comfortable doing it in the birth center in case his cord slipped down quickly before his head and risking it going around his neck. They had to move me to the labor unit for my waters to be broken in a controlled environment, I guess... with doctors on standby (still had a midwife attending me, NO doctor.) Anyway... I blame my stubborn thick bag of waters and the posterior position for things not going my way!
Still had a vaginal birth with forceps assistance, though.


This time, however, since I have been through labor before, and feel like I know what I'm doing beyond what can be unpredictable, I'm intending on having a home birth.

[Justjessica]

I had a hospital birth for DS1 and had home births for DS2 and DS3. It was the best decision I ever made. Despite having cord issues with both DS2 and DS3 the midwives were amazing and solved the problems with the equipment they had to hand. It was so lovely to be surrounded by my family and introduce the new baby gently when DS1 woke up and then DS1+2 a year later. In hospital DH was sent home as it was night and could only visit between 6.30-8.30pm. It was horrible having to do everything on my own as the staff were lovely but far too busy. It was a far better experience getting to sleep in my own bed in my quiet bedroom with DH on hand to help. I'd never go back to hospital again unless it was a dire emergency.

[OneLastDream]

I had hospital for ds1, home birth for ds2 and hospital for ds3. We wanted home birth for ds3 but agreed if we went over dates we would go to hospital as midwives were nervous as ds2 was 10lb back to back and 2 mins to resuscitation but it was fantastic being at home. I feel more nervous this time so opted out of home birth this time but we are really lucky as a midwife run unit has been opened attached to hospital which is basically like home from home - even has double bed that pulls down if your hubby wants to stay overnight with you! Home births are great though - I loved it x