so i sat down last night and tried to bring up having more babies it wasn't a nice conversion and in the end had me questing where did we go wrong
so i sat down last night and tried to bring up having more babies it wasn't a nice conversion and in the end had me questing where did we go wrong
When i met DP he already had 2 kids, i didnt have any so we talked about it pretty soon into our relationship. I said i would like 2 and he agreed that that would be ok but no more than that. We are pregnant with our second now and i know that asking for any more would be out of the question. Now i am a little jealous of him because he has 2 more than me, but there is nothing i can do about that i guess.
i meet my dh when i was quite young so the question of how kids we wanted never crossed my mind we always new we want kids but how many well that was never answered now i find my self wanting to try for that little boy more then ever and he says a firm no way which left me heart broken and disappointed in him so i guess i worried that we may not want for things the same down the track :(
I do try to think about it from the other person's perspective to though, what if I didn't want anymore kids and he was really pushing me. I wouldn't like it. So I try to listen to his argument. I think this possibly might be our last, but we'll see?
I guess I can understand I have 4 daughters so I guess I just long for that little boy
We are in the same place, also with 4 daughters. It's me who is dying for a son and DH is totally unsympathetic.
I really want a girl and i made that very clear to dh when i was preg with ds3 that there is no way im stopping till i get one and i am very unsympathetic towards him not wanting anymore.. in the end its me being pregnant and in labour its me cleaning the house and its me caring for the kids... he is useless in any of those categories so i feel that if i want one it is ultimately my decision... ds three was my only planned baby... i got my iud taken out i told him i was ovulating and there will be no protected sex cause i want a baby and he did... i think that if it is something that you just cant simply live without then you should do it... men dont see it how we do they dont have the maternal instincts
We always did!
My OH could quite happily have stopped after DS1. He didn't really want anymore children, but he always knew (and accepted) that I didn't want our son to be an only child. But he drew the line at two children.
Now two years after DS2 was born, he says he 'doesn't mind' another baby - but it certainly isn't his "choice" and he isn't bubbling over with excitement. He's doing it for me, because he knows how much it means to me to try just one last time for a DD. I don't think I'd manage to convince him of a fourth although I'd love two little girls!
When we discussed kids he wanted 5 I wanted 3, over the years we settled on 3 as I was the one who had to actually have them lol Well it never occurred to me I'd only have one gender so after dd3 was born I told him I wanted another, he refused. He was happy with his girls, no desire for another one even if we swayed our butts off. It took 3 years to wear him down and agree to start ttc, I conceived quickly and m/c. I'll spare you the details but it was a terrible m/c and I nearly died. For a few months he wouldn't even discuss trying again, he finally agreed and we now have a gorgeous, nearly 10 month old son. We now BOTH agree we are done. Be gentle and give him time to adjust the idea. Bring it up softly "oh look at that sweet baby" "omg what a cute little boy". He'll either start to come around or tell you to flat drop it, it's never going to happen.