A Little Sad Right Now!!!

First, I am not very close to my dad, he acts more like an uncle to me then a dad. I don't expect much from him but when I do talk to him I hope he would listen, be supportive, and be happy for me... Quick Life Brief...

I am the 2nd oldest and have 2 younger sister. Growing up with a lot of kids is hard but what I really wanted to hear most was "Piper I love you" all I ever heard was "I love my kids" but he would tell my brother (C) and 2 sister (M and J) that he loved them and direct it to just them.

I tried my best to impress him and wished he would say he was proud of me. I can sing, write stories and poetry, sew clothing, cross-stitch, and I am good at guess the ingredents of resturant food and copy it at home. But my dad doesn't know any of this because he is never there for me. He missed every school/church chore preformance but made it to my bro (C) and sister (M), and told them how well they did and they could become a singer. The only time he read a poem of mine (about him) he sad it was to sad and he didn't want to read my other poems, no "you are great" "you could get it published" "my child is so talented".

And DS2 middle name is my dads first name but yet at 14mths old DS2 has never met my dad. My dad travels to WV every 2 mths to see my bro and his family but has never come here and I am a 5hr drive.

....

He is the only one (other then hubby and a close friend) that knows about us swaying and even trying for #3. I told him in hopes of having someone to talk too. Someone to be excited with. Someone to say go for it you can do it. But you know what he said yesterday after he asked how everything was going with the research... "you will get another boy" not once did he say I hope you get a girl, or anything that was supportive... I guess it is my fault for once again trying to be close to him and looking to him for support.

I haven't seen my mom in 5 years, my sisters are to selfish to care, my brother has 2G and 1B so he wouldn't understand, and I don't want to tell my mom-in-law because she would get her hopes up and I don't want to hurt her if it is another boy.

I just wanted my dad to be my dad. I feel like he killed my girl:sad: :SS:

I am so sorry. Many of us have had similar experiences with family members...I have found the least support from family and the most from total strangers.

My dad is cut from the same cloth as yours in a lot of ways and I just wanted to tell you, it does get better over the course of time. ((((hugs)))) and I am praying your daughter will be coming to you very soon.