Trying to move on?

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May 9th, 2011, 02:20 AM
Myloves

Trying to move on?

I'm not very good with introductions, but I'll give it shot anyway:suprise:
I was Myloves on IG but I changed my name a couple of months ago, then those monkeys brought me here to Gdreaming because I was getting sick of them.
I had alot of issues resulting from a terrible childhood and men related to me in general :( which made me scared of the idea of raising a son(s). When I had DS1, I had gender depression, although it was pretty mild compared with the dark days when I was pregnant with DS2 - who is now my sweetheart and the easiest of the two. I didn't bond with either of them at birth properly, but I bonded with DS1 much faster.

I've never had issues with other people having sons of course, or males that aren't related to me. I mean, I look at families that have many boys and think of them as adorable - but for some crazy reason, I just don't think that way about my own family. :(

I'm also not so worried about my boys being little boys (I think little boys can be so sweet:hearts:) it's the fact that one day they will be grown men:worry: and I can't help but think that I might be failure at raising my boys. What if screw up and they become horrible as teens and continue on to be even worse adult men? What if they end up like my brothers/dad/uncles? :( I hate thinking this way, I really do - but I can't even help it. I love them with all my heart, and I'm writing this in an attempt to open up and tell you all about my problems so that I can take a step forward and try to overcome them.

Another thing is, I always wanted 2 or three girls. Not just one - so when my DD was born, I was happy and sad at the same time. I was sad that I would never ever have another girl because my husband said he was done. He only ever wanted one or two kids at the most. I was the one who pushed for a third and he agreed with me only because he thought there might have been a chance we had a girl. (He knew how much I wanted a DD). I'd love to hear from other moms who had 2 boys and then a girl - or even familes who have many boys but only one girl. Does you daughter feel lonely? I'm worried that my sons will leave my daughter out of their games/etc. They seem to get along fine with their baby sister for now and I'm hoping it will last.

Thanks for reading my short story. If you didn't decide to stop reading halfwat through that is. :P
May 9th, 2011, 08:39 AM
nuthinbutpink

I am not sure if you want to hear from me because I have more than one DD, but I am going to try anyway! Here's the thing- your DD doesn't ever have to be lonely- 1. She has YOU! You guys can have a really special relationship- one that I will never know- and it can be whatever the two of you want it to be! Yes, having more than one DD is nice some days, but a pain in the butt others. They fight just like I imagine brothers would but with hair pulling.

2. She will make friends! She will have friends and just because she doesn't have a blood sister, there is no reason she cannot find a soul-sister in life.

3. She has 2 brothers that came before her that she will likely be great pals with! Many people have awesome brother/sister bonds. I have a sister and we get along fine but I talk with my brother more as an adult!

I think as parents, a lot of what we worry about are our issues and have nothing to do with our kids. Our kids are just fine for the most part. We can project our concerns and worries on them, but that's all we are doing is projecting and they are just fine. I am sure your DD will be just fine!
May 9th, 2011, 09:58 AM
Mykids

I dont have a sister, I have an elder brother & i am so close to him even after marriage. Brothers are really sweat & caring. I share every thing with my brother & he is so supportive. trust me having brothers is a nicest thing in the world. Your DD will be very happy with her brothers.
May 9th, 2011, 06:08 PM
Myloves

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mykids

I dont have a sister, I have an elder brother & i am so close to him even after marriage. Brothers are really sweat & caring. I share every thing with my brother & he is so supportive. trust me having brothers is a nicest thing in the world. Your DD will be very happy with her brothers.

Thanks so much for answering! My boys are getting along pretty well with their sister atm, and I'm hoping it will last!
May 9th, 2011, 06:31 PM
Glittergirl

I was one of three girls, no brothers :( My sisters and I always wanted a brother. I always wished for a brother then went on to pray for sons since I never had a brother. I think your daughter will be so lucky to have 2 brothers. I always envied my friends with brothers, especially older brothers that would protect them and be the older protective brother. She's very lucky!
May 9th, 2011, 11:48 PM
Liv

I have 2 boys and then a little girl also. From time to time I get a little sad knowing that she will never have a sister. I like what NBP wrote, made me feel better.
May 10th, 2011, 01:50 AM
Myloves

Quote:

Originally Posted by nuthinbutpink

I am not sure if you want to hear from me because I have more than one DD, but I am going to try anyway! Here's the thing- your DD doesn't ever have to be lonely- 1. She has YOU! You guys can have a really special relationship- one that I will never know- and it can be whatever the two of you want it to be! Yes, having more than one DD is nice some days, but a pain in the butt others. They fight just like I imagine brothers would but with hair pulling.

2. She will make friends! She will have friends and just because she doesn't have a blood sister, there is no reason she cannot find a soul-sister in life.

3. She has 2 brothers that came before her that she will likely be great pals with! Many people have awesome brother/sister bonds. I have a sister and we get along fine but I talk with my brother more as an adult!

I think as parents, a lot of what we worry about are our issues and have nothing to do with our kids. Our kids are just fine for the most part. We can project our concerns and worries on them, but that's all we are doing is projecting and they are just fine. I am sure your DD will be just fine!

Thanks for replyingh NBP! I'm very glad to hear from someone who has lots of girls actually :) It's nice to see many people's perspectives.
May 10th, 2011, 01:51 AM
Myloves

Quote:

Originally Posted by Glittergirl

I was one of three girls, no brothers :( My sisters and I always wanted a brother. I always wished for a brother then went on to pray for sons since I never had a brother. I think your daughter will be so lucky to have 2 brothers. I always envied my friends with brothers, especially older brothers that would protect them and be the older protective brother. She's very lucky!

Thank you for all your replies ladies your making me feel much better:hearts:
May 10th, 2011, 01:52 AM
Myloves

Quote:

Originally Posted by nuthinbutpink

I think as parents, a lot of what we worry about are our issues and have nothing to do with our kids. Our kids are just fine for the most part. We can project our concerns and worries on them, but that's all we are doing is projecting and they are just fine. I am sure your DD will be just fine!

Thankyou - I really needed to hear that :P
May 10th, 2011, 01:53 AM
Myloves

Quote:

Originally Posted by Liv

I have 2 boys and then a little girl also. From time to time I get a little sad knowing that she will never have a sister. I like what NBP wrote, made me feel better.

Liv, it's great to see another mom who wishes for a sister for her dd at times too! Glad you replied.

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