Hello Just a little about me. As i am New Here With 4 boys xx
Hello i am new here from ingender xx. sick to death of their little Monkeys.
I have 4 gorgeous boys
But i have been wanting a little girl for as long as i can remember x.
Here is my story x.
My mother passed away when i was 6yrs old. She was only 30yr. My sister and i never had a mother figure. So i always dreamed of being a mother and having a daughter to do all the things i missed with her. With my own daughter.
This tore my dad apart and he took to drink. Which meant i had to grow up quick to look after my sister. Our relationship has been strained ever since. he is still drinking now
So when i finally found a person i can spend my whole life with. I love so much. We decided to start a family. In 2006 i found out i was pregnant and at the 20week scan. I was devastated to find out that he was a boy. I got over it very quickly. Then after i had him, it was a distant memory. (I had no idea what GD was until 2010)
Then i fell pregnant again and we decided not to find out the gender. I didn't feel blue and when he was born at home. I had no feelings of GD. I went about my normal life and was grateful to two gorgeous healthy boys. During that time my husband's brother's wife was due on the same day. But she was a week late and had a boy. Which i was delighted with. As they were trying for a couple of years with no success. There is more to that story. But it would take ages to explain
Baby number 3 was concieved when Baby no2 was 8 months old. Very UNEXPECTED pregnancy. But happy pregnancy xx. By that time i was desperated for a little girl and was very devastated to find out he was a boy. But it threw me how much it bothered me. That is when i found out about GD. Needless to when he was born i fell instantly in love with him and never not for one moment regretted him x. But the pain was still there.
I was not given any support from my inlaws and was repeatedly told again and again that i will never have a girl. That their side never makes girls. I bit my tongue and felt that it wasn't my place to say how i feel.
My husband's brother's wife had her 2nd baby which was a girl. I was happy for them but devastated as well. By this time i told my husband that i needed some space. As they knew how i felt. But asked my husband to tell them i needed space.
The Day that they left hospital. They turned up at my hose to show off their new bundle of pink joy. Luckly we were out. As my hubby wanted to cheer me up and get me out of the house to forget about it for a few hours. But i recieved a text demanding where we were. From since then. She has taken every opportunity to rub it in my face. After everything i did to support her in her devastion of not being able to fall pregnant. Then calm her down during her first pregnancy. To top that of my mother inlaw told me to get over it. My feelings are invaild and that i have a beautiful niece to cuddle and see. But after all the pulling aside and being told to tread carefully. Which i have done for years without being told. She is noe 3 years old. For three years i had to endure her bring dresses to my house (and Inlaws) and ask me to choose one for her beautiful daughter to wear. I bit my tongue and cried when i got home.
So we kept our distance for a while. We then decided to sway for a girl on our fourth attempt. We told everyone what we were going to do. We were then informed that my Bro inlaw didnt want any more just yet and they were going to wait. I fell pregnant first go. I asked my sis inlaw if she was able to look after the kids for a little while. Whilst i was at my scan as My Mother inlaw was on holiday. Before i was able to show the scan photosshe annouced that she was pregnant aswell and was due on the same day. Bro inlaw told us that it was an accident. But she told me that she calculated her fertile days. I couldnt believe it. but i kept my opionion to myself.
My pregnancy went off without a hitch. Just before xmas day we found out that they thought it was a girl and they weren't to sure. So we paid for a private ultrasound scan to have our dreams shattered that we were infact having another boy. We were devasted. I didnt get over it at all. It wasnt until i went into premature labour at 35 weeks. That i thought to my myself someone wanted me to have this little boy and i am being ungrateful. Even tho he was early he is healthy xx. The week after my supposed due date my Sis Inlaw had a little girl. She proceeds to push her girlies in my face. I have never hurt her in any way. I struggle to go xmas and birthday shopping for them. But i get what they want and go a little OTT on prezzies. I have told her her that it is hard for me. But i still bend over backwards to please her and her kids. I look at my boys and think i will never use my kids as a weapon. I am soo grateful for my boys. The youngest i look at him and he is the most beautiful big blue eyed chubby cheeked boy. I wouldnt change them for the world xxx. But i have a little whole in my heart that would only be fulfilled with a princess xxxx.
