Atomic - Should dh release or abstain

Hi Atomic I know you must get asked this all the time and I'm sorry for rehashing it. I'm 11dpo with a bfn this morning after getting a bfp at 7dpo and faint then fainter lines for days 8-10. I will never test early again. It was all fun and games when you didn't expect to see anything but when I did.... obviously I'm heartbroken but determined to move on. Next cycle will be month 5 ttc. My dh is 44 and I'm under the impression he shouldn't abstain? During the previous 3 cycles I was asking him to release every 4 days but we kinda fell by the way side this cycle and I have no idea when and if he released in the 10 days or so leading up to o. What would you suggest for our next attempt? Should I him release every 4.days with me (protected) or without me before estimated o or should he abstain for approx 7 days? We've nailed the timing last 3 of 4 cycles to day before and once likely day of o so I'm wondering if there's anything else we can do to improve our chance of bfp. I've been on le diet for approx 25 weeks (cheated 12 days last 2ww and minor cheating this 2ww for 10days) not using antihistamines or anything else, dh taking ole and I'm using fibre. That's my sway in a nutshell, diet and one attempt. Appreciate any input you can offer :)

I think atomic has dropped abstain for most men, especially older guys. By your 5th cycle I'd think you might want to add a second attempt, so do e4d unprotected and add an attempt at pos opk. Hope you get your sticky bean soon!


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I'm really nervous about an extra attempt my boys were both conceived with multiple attempts so I might give it another go first with just the one. So dh should release every 4 days from now until close to o? I'm also considering dtd the morning after solid smiley opk (if its at all possible) so my attempt is closer to o than the day before.

Release every 4 days or dtd every 4 days

Pbn, atomic told me hubby should not abstain, he is 37...we released by hand every 2-4 days and 1 attempt with the fertile period which was 2 days before O. Hope you get your bfp very soon!! Xx

Thanks Tiffsal! I think I remembered reading you heard pink???

I did at my 12weeks. Im waiting my 20weeks scan but the sonographer was 99.9% sure. Couldnt be happier. My sil doesnt believe is sways but i obviously do since it worked for me. All fingers are crossed for you! Xx

It's time for you guys to drop freuency totally, Pbn.

I'd have him release on his own or with you, with a condom every 2-4 days for as far in advance of attempt as is feasible.

Also let's drop fiber now.

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Originally Posted by Pbn3

I'm really nervous about an extra attempt my boys were both conceived with multiple attempts so I might give it another go first with just the one. So dh should release every 4 days from now until close to o? I'm also considering dtd the morning after solid smiley opk (if its at all possible) so my attempt is closer to o than the day before.

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I'd like to see you give it a try without frequency but wiht one attempt before I start adding attempts.

That hving been said you have been on diet a long time now so may be time to add attempts!

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Originally Posted by has2gentlemen

I think atomic has dropped abstain for most men, especially older guys. By your 5th cycle I'd think you might want to add a second attempt, so do e4d unprotected and add an attempt at pos opk. Hope you get your sticky bean soon!


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:agree: but the exception is if someone's been doing a strict sway, I'd rather they dropped everything but kept one attempt at least one month before adding attempts. :)