Bfp and so much anxiety about wanting dd, advice?! Wisdom?!
I've been on gender dreaming since last summer, I'm sooo nervous and can't calm down. I just tested and had a bfp 3 days before missed period. I know that it may not stick. But Ive been ttc girl since last aug. Im 40 and have 1dd and 2 ds. I only really want a healthy dd. I did LE diet, skipping breakfast, excercised 70 min 6 days a week (running really hard) I had one attempt after ovulation I'm guessing bc all cramps stopped at 7pm and dtd at 10. It was my only option this month I wasn't a fan of dtd after ovulation, seems like it would sway boy, if it even resulted in bfp. So I never expected to get a bfp. Now I'm petrified. What if I didn't do enough? What if the boy sperm swam faster? I'm soo scared of gender disappointment, I had it bad last time and I know my dd will be devastated as well. I'm sorry this sounds so selfish. I know it's a waiting game no and see if it sticks and I get a desired gender. I'm afraid to find out I don't want to get depressed again!! Why is this happening ?! I am thried ingot a bfp but have horrible anxiety, has anyone experienced this?? It's my first time, I've always been so relieved now with swaying I feel anxiety!!
