Atomic, Rainbow, Zanacal if you were me???

So AF is ending but I am not expected to see a +OPK till 20th. I am TTC girl, been on supplements: folic, cranberry, Calcium/Mag and been on LE diet (lost weight). DH is on Cranberry and licorice root today. If you were me would you do DTD starting soon till O day (reminder my husband is almost 43)?? Or can I abstain and wait till the 18th and try then go for O+1 and try again on 21st (I know there are some risks with his age, but he's super healthy and very healthy other babies).
If we were to start BDing in a row, should I douche everytime? I was going to buy Summer's Eve douche then do lime douche afterward with tampon. I also bought Sylk, waiting for it to arrive, can I use this inconjunction?
Thanks!

so OV day is likely to be on the 21st. do you mean to abstain until O-1 (20th) and then try again on the 21st too?
if so, you could do that. How certain are you that you'll get a pos OPK on that day? have you ever missed your surge before?

given your DH's age, it might be better to wait until a pos OPK, release and discard as soon as you see that (at least once), and then DTD as soon as you can afterwards and again on the day after the pos OPK. It could be that your DH's sperm are already lower quality and abstaining would be too much for them. However, frequent BD after your abstain attempt might get some more swimmers in there so you can conceive faster

alternatively you could keep an eye out for fertile CM and then do the same as above (release and discard to jump-start your FR, then DTD soon after) and BD daily until after you have OVed

if you're going to have more than one attempt you will want to lower pH back down between attempts too

I haven't heard of that douche before, what is it?

yes, you could use Sylk when BDing too

it's a fine balance between lowering sperm count in order to sway, and not killing everything off/killing too many off so you can't get pregnant. Unfortunately every person is different, so there's no way of saying where this line is for you. If you conceived fast before, you could give it a couple of months before cutting things out to improve your chances of conception. If not you might want to start off doing less...

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Originally Posted by rainbowflower

so OV day is likely to be on the 21st. do you mean to abstain until O-1 (20th) and then try again on the 21st too?
if so, you could do that. How certain are you that you'll get a pos OPK on that day? have you ever missed your surge before?

given your DH's age, it might be better to wait until a pos OPK, release and discard as soon as you see that (at least once), and then DTD as soon as you can afterwards and again on the day after the pos OPK. It could be that your DH's sperm are already lower quality and abstaining would be too much for them. However, frequent BD after your abstain attempt might get some more swimmers in there so you can conceive faster

alternatively you could keep an eye out for fertile CM and then do the same as above (release and discard to jump-start your FR, then DTD soon after) and BD daily until after you have OVed

if you're going to have more than one attempt you will want to lower pH back down between attempts too

I haven't heard of that douche before, what is it?

yes, you could use Sylk when BDing too

it's a fine balance between lowering sperm count in order to sway, and not killing everything off/killing too many off so you can't get pregnant. Unfortunately every person is different, so there's no way of saying where this line is for you. If you conceived fast before, you could give it a couple of months before cutting things out to improve your chances of conception. If not you might want to start off doing less...

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Thanks Rainbow!! I understand how you are saying to do it after +OPK! I would have him FR after seeing the +OPK, then DTD immediately after and maybe the following day.

Summer's Eve is a vinegar douche.

Rainbowflower, I found this post and your response to another woman:
"if your DH is capable of releasing in the morning then BD that same night for a few days in a row, that is perfect for swaying pink!"
Since my O-3 is the 18th, I just told him to release in the morning before work than later that night we will DTD! If releasing morning helps, and I always like the idea of cutoff, then I think this may be our route :) Thank you!!

Personally I would want to do a bit more than that - if I were doing a compressed frequent release I would have DH release 2 or 3 times for a couple of days in a row before picking up with the above (release once and discard then DTD) for our attempts. It's like getting your 'traditional' 7 days of frequent release crammed in to a few days!

I would NEVER abstain if my husband was 43. It has nothing to do with health, there is genetic damage that begins at birth (even before birth) that we all undergo all the time and the older you are, the more genetic damage your cells accumulate. Previous health of children has nothing to do with it eiteher - jsut like with Downs Syndrome, it is AGE that matters. A woman can have 7 normal healthy children but still have a higher risk of Downs if you conceive over age 35.

I do not like douching and I would never use it but here are the directions so you know how to if you like.http://genderdreaming.com/forum/ttc-...-ttc-pink.html The amount of douching you are describing would leave you with slim to no chance of pg anyway. I would much rather see you do JUST Sylk or if you must, a before douche, Sylk as a lube, and NOTHING afterwards. If you do choose to douche, then you only need to douche when you're getting close to your attempt.

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

I would NEVER abstain if my husband was 43. It has nothing to do with health, there is genetic damage that begins at birth (even before birth) that we all undergo all the time and the older you are, the more genetic damage your cells accumulate. Previous health of children has nothing to do with it eiteher - jsut like with Downs Syndrome, it is AGE that matters. A woman can have 7 normal healthy children but still have a higher risk of Downs if you conceive over age 35.

I do not like douching and I would never use it but here are the directions so you know how to if you like.http://genderdreaming.com/forum/ttc-...-ttc-pink.html The amount of douching you are describing would leave you with slim to no chance of pg anyway. I would much rather see you do JUST Sylk or if you must, a before douche, Sylk as a lube, and NOTHING afterwards. If you do choose to douche, then you only need to douche when you're getting close to your attempt.

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Thanks Atomic! I am glad you responded! I actually was reading someone's recent post yesterday - and I was going crazy changing my whole plan and told my husband he needed to start doing FR immediately!! He said he will start today. Does he have to everyday or is every other ok? Also, I know you mentioned timing does not matter, but we were planning on trying on the 18th of this month, it will be O-2, should he still FR in the morning and then we try later that night??

THANKS!!

Don't do every other day as that's optimal for sperm count and for a boy! Make sure he doesn't ever go more than 24 hours between releases and having him release in the morning and DTD in the evening might help too - though you might not want to do this with a 2 day cut-off as some of the sperm will have died by the time you O anyway.

Zanacal-
So when should he, should he do everyday or should he just do 7 days before DTD, and I have him start on the the 12th (just in case I get a +OPK early) and then we do DTD on the 18th? Or would you recommend a different option?

I would just have him start now and keep going until your attempt - maybe see how he feels and if he's still going strong have him release in the morning of your attempt day and then DTD in the evening. Good luck whatever you decide!

Thanks Zanacal! I just finished reading your posts on your DH FR - LOL!! He provided a lot of great info!! I noticed you DTD with condom, so I can help him out some nights, I just have to be safe, right and check that ph doesn't rise as well, right? You only tried one time - I forgot did you use rephresh or sylk?