Husband over 35 frequency question

Hello. We are ttc a girl after 3 boys. My husband is 37 (I just turned 38 and he will be 38 soon). We have never had issues getting pregnant, with our last baby being conceived when we were 35 no issues. My husband has always had issues with being unable to recuperate if we dtd too often. Our last two boys were abstain babies and our first boy was conceived through every other day BD.

We tried to do FR with cr this cycle since I know abstain is not recommended for men over 35. He was able to release 3 days in a row and then I got my peak opk early and we really needed to dtd yesterday so we tried to do a compressed release (release the at midnight and then BD the next morning) but he couldn’t get erect. So we tried again last night around midnight which would have been a full 24 hours since last release. He was able to get erect but couldn’t stay that way and couldn’t ejaculate. I’m pretty sure I ovulated last night so unless we can somehow do it this morning the whole cycle is a bust. It seems clear the only way we can do this is abstain, so how long can we abstain to sway without causing increased birth defects if we get pregnant? He has no issues getting erect and releasing if there has been a day or two to recover typically.


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I'm sorry, this question had a glitch in the title and wasn't showing up for me. I fixed the glitch, hope you see my reply! I think we may have talked by email as well.

The FR doesn't do anything at all. Just drop it and go to either "do what he does" which is pretty self explanatory or by having him do regular release every 2-4 days and then keeping the one attempt. Most guys can release that often and still manage to get the job done during the fertile window.