Prayers for u and your Baby signingmommy 💕💕💕
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Prayers for u and your Baby signingmommy 💕💕💕
Lots of love and prayers coming your way signingmommy. Hoping for a sticky bean and Monday shows great betas![emoji173]️
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Happy new year ladies, I've been very hit and miss these past couple of weeks and have a LOAD of pages to catch up on! I hope you, and bumps, are all keeping well. Everything is quiet here, had a lovely Christmas other than being very fatigued and suffering quite a lot of nausea - but that seems to be lifting now thankfully. I have a follow-up scan after the UTI at my local EPU next Friday. I will be 10+1 by LMP but reckon I'm about 2-3 days less going by my own dates. Nervous but hopefully everything will be ok :)
As for the never ending, always lurking GD - I am much more at peace with the idea of a third boy now than I was before getting pregnant. A close friend of mine recently found out her fourth son (she hadn't heard of swaying but tried Shettles for a girl) has a very serious heart defect and he may not survive long post delivery, and if he does it will be operation after operation for a long long time. It really puts things in perspective for me. I know we all obviously hope for a healthy child, thats a given, but I think during the past year I took the idea of health for granted.
I have found a great deal of solace in XXs words on a previous page - that we are given the baby we need. I look at DS1, who was "my girl" long before he was born and for the longest time after he was here I grieved for that baby girl. I never felt that grief with DS2, I knew he was a boy long before the sonographer ever told me. I knew it in my heart and I was thrilled with a boy second time around but with DS1 he was "supposed to be a girl" or at least I felt that way for ages. Now I look at the bond we have and I don't think I could get through the day without him in it. He is the absolute LOVE of my life. He was, and is, most definitely the child I didn't know I needed. And this baby will be the same - boy or girl. I can't say if my GD is at peace for good but at least for now and the foreseeable future I can be at ease in the knowledge that this child is destined for me.
Hopper, I totally agree re the health thing putting gender things in perspective - in the days after the birth of our second DD a very large birthmark developed on her forehead, cheek and scalp, and after running lots of tests they found she has something called PHACES syndrome, albeit very mildly. We have been extremely lucky as she appears to be totally healthy (despite having a horrible experience this time last year when after multiple rushes to A&e in the middle of the night as she couldn't breathe they discovered a second birthmark growing and obstructing 70% of her airway) and her facial birthmark is slowly fading, but on our journey we have met some amazing families and I have become very aware of the huge heartbreak and health issues that people face with their children. So we too are just praying and praying for a healthy bub! That said, we would still absolutely love it if the healthy bub were a boy! And despite being a little disappointed that DD2 was a girl, we were so overwhelmed by all the medical stuff that I didn't have the slightest GD when she was born and now I just absolutely love my two girls, as you say they are both totally perfect for me and our family, birthmarks and all!
With my last two pregnancies I was blissfully naive I suppose, and saw my scans mostly just as an exciting chance to see the baby and find out the gender, but this time around I am much more scared about finding something wrong. I have my NT scan tomorrow morning and I am terrified! Will be trying to persuade the sonographer to get a nub shot for me, but based on past experience our sonographers aren't quite as obliging as some in other countries!
Ps still being haunted by the horrendous nausea and sickness but am so fed up with it I have decided to stop moaning about it! This strange new life of hugging the loo, bed, pjyamas, odd foods and no social life has become the norm and I will let you know when it ends rather than continuing to say the same things!
Pps just wanted to make sure it didn't sound like I was saying that people shouldn't have GD because it is not important (if I thought that I wouldn't be here!) or that someone's GD isn't as important as my daughter's health issues - I totally get that it is a very real thing and I experienced it myself with DD1. We actually have told very few people that we have been swaying or hoping for a boy partly because I was concerned that people would think 'how on earth can they be bothered about gender given what they have faced with Emma (dd2)?' But you can care about both health and gender at the same time and I'm not ashamed to admit that whilst we pray primarily for health for this little one we would also love and pray for a boy!
I just 're-read my post and the exact same thing came into my mind. I truly hope my earlier post didn't come across as non-GD friendly or understanding. I apologise if it does come across that way, that wasn't what I intended at all.Quote:
Originally Posted by Foxcubblue
I have suffered with GD backwards and forwards, up and down for almost 5 years now so I know too well what a horrible burden it is to bear. I lived this horrible in between life even before having my first son where I was waiting on my daughter. I could SEE her, I named her, I knew she was there. And the GUILT that came after, ugh. You all know what I'm talking about I'm sure. That guilt can still get to me. I enjoyed delivering my eldest son, not many women can say that I'm sure, but I hate to relive the memory as it just brings back how I felt which reinforces the guilt!
I think I just needed to write the words down to really know how I felt, if that makes sense - so thank you ladies for being my unsuspecting sounding board. I feel better in myself and this pregnancy having written the words down. Obviously I hold onto hope that the child we are destined to have is my longed for daughter, I'm sure that want won't go away overnight, if ever but I am so much more at ease with whatever comes. Funny that only a fortnight ago I was trying myself up in knots over a friend who is also the mother of boys said that we will be lesser women for never birthing and rearing women. She was obviously in the pits of GD herself, she is very open about wanting a girl, so I wasn't offended by her words as they encompassed us both but they really stung and I was beating myself up for not getting a scan pic at my last scan so I could Ramzi it until it disintegrated. It's funny cause two weeks ago I would have probably made myself sick with the anxiety I felt at never having a daughter but now I'm here and can't muster a single drop of anxiety (says her with the history of anxiety and anxiety meds lol!) Long may the feeling last cause I don't miss feeling GD whatsoever!
Heres hoping we all get the healthy child that was destined for us - that may just be the gender we desire too! Xxxxx
If it's any consolation hun I began to feel better from about 12-14 weeks on my guys. And for what it's worth I really think you will hear blue!!Quote:
Originally Posted by Foxcubblue
Best of luck at your NT tomorrow! Sending lots of positive vibes and hoping for a nub shot (though I am woefully inexperienced!!)
Also thank you for sharing your story about DD2! I am glad she is ok and is able to live life as normally as possible. You are absolutely blessed with your little ladies, as am I with my gentlemen. I think GD makes us more grateful at least that's what I am feeling more recently. Hate to think how I have taken things for granted in the past - like the scans you mentioned. It is definitely naivety, nothing more. Maybe we were lucky to be so naive for so long!
Can't wait for your update on the NT tomorrow xxx
If it's any consolation hun I began to feel better from about 12-14 weeks on my guys. And for what it's worth I really think you will hear blue!!Quote:
Originally Posted by Foxcubblue
Best of luck at your NT tomorrow! Sending lots of positive vibes and hoping for a nub shot (though I am woefully inexperienced!!)
Also thank you for sharing your story about DD2! I am glad she is ok and is able to live life as normally as possible. You are absolutely blessed with your little ladies, as am I with my gentlemen. I think GD makes us more grateful at least that's what I am feeling more recently. Hate to think how I have taken things for granted in the past - like the scans you mentioned. It is definitely naivety, nothing more. Maybe we were lucky to be so naive for so long!
Can't wait for your update on the NT tomorrow xxx
So nice to hear from you Hopper and Foxcub!!! I don't think anything you ladies said would or could be taken the wrong way!!
So I just turned 15 weeks today and I still "don't think" I have felt the baby move. Nothing that has been obviously the baby anyway. I know it is early but I am pretty sure that I have felt at least 4 of my babies by now, even my posterior placenta baby (which this one is not), I just can't help but worry, and it's times like this I wish I had purchased a fetal Doppler. My next appointment is in 8 days!