Roll-call!! Due June/July/August 2013

I could use some advice.... We broke the news to our families last night, which I have been dreading because they haven't always been the most supportive and this is what happened. I know part of this is my fault because of the way I did it but if I had to tall them face to face it was never going to happen. What I did was take a picture of my boys' swim trunks hanging on the clothesline and added a diaper after the third pair. I posted the picture with the caption "our summer plans" I then sent a text to my mom, sisters and dad (because they all have smart phons and continuous access to their Facebook) a text right before I posted the picture that they needed to check out my Facebook page (which I have never done so I knew it would get their attention). My mom called within a minute so I know they got the texts and my timing was good. I talked to her for about15 minutes she was fine. I told her how far along I was and that I have known since october. My dad tried to trick me and say he doesn't have a fb but I know my stepmom does and then he said she wasn't home, but then she called me and said my dad was just joking and was trying to get me to tell him myself but they were just playing around, no hurt feelings. My sister on the other hand posted a comment about how heartbroken she was and hurt that I didn't tell her in person and that this was a reality check for her to find out after so many other ppl especially since I had known since October, blah, blah, blah..... I responded that I was sorry that I hurt her fee linings and that I had set the text beforehand so my immediate family would be the first to know. And the deleted both comments (hers and mine) about 30 minutes later after she had the chance to see it but so that everyone else wouldn't think I was a loser. I know she found out quickly because she had time to talk to my mom to find out that I found out in October before she posted anything and she only posted about 25 minutes after I did and I have never told her before I told my mom and dad we have always tried to tell everyone at the same time so they can't be jealous that someone else found out first.

I'm not sure how to handle this, right now I am just waiting it out because she tends to freak out and blow everything out of proportion, but I'm not sure what my best response should be and this only confirms my feelings that I should have just waited longer so I didn't have to deal with this right now.

Mommyof3boys - Me personally - Id ignore her - Its your happy news, your pregnancy, your life and your right to share the new however you choose - I know its not nice but if she cant just be pleased for you id be keeping my distance and ignoring any comments as you really dont need the stress right now. Sorry if it sounds unsympathetic but i have no time for people trying to msake things special to me all about them.

Mum23boys-that's my plan so far but unfortunately she is one of those people that think that she has to complain to everyone around her and make peoplel choose "sides". She already sent me a message that I don't need to pick up her son after school today which aggravates me because she is making him skip an after school activity to punish me???

On the flip side though her nastiness made it not bother me when my brother in law commented that it will probably just be another boy. He is young and I'm sure he doesn't realize how hurtful those comments can be but at this point I am really just trying to prepare myself for a boy anyway so that I'm not so crushed if I don't get a girl.

mommyof3boys....really disappointing when a close family member responds like that. I am sure she will come round soon and be happy for you. it can be difficult with family. my parents in law were totally shocked and think it's very soon for a third child. Probably pitying my poor husband who will be dealing with 3 kids under 5 yrs old, when in fact it is me that does most of the child minding around here.

Bama- really sorry you didn't get your boy...i would gladly spend you on all my boy dust....i seem to have an over abundance of it.

LO123, Jennaesue and Emmy Roo- hear you on the obsessing and GD! I probably think about it a million times a day. When I wake to go to the loo at night I think about it and it's certainly always the last thought that preoccupies my mind before I fall asleep. I am so sick of obsessing over different pregnancy symptoms and every other tiny possible sign this could be a girl. It has definitely been a more difficult pregnancy than the other two, but as we hear over and over again it has nothing to do with gender. The nausea has pretty much abated and now I am contending with heartburn after most meals...the spider veins on my right leg have totally gone out of control and the support tights are a nightmare to wear...am already dreading summer and then I keep thinking all this suffering and it will most likely just be another boy. Terrible I know, especially after all the women that have had losses here, but true. I am actually considering therapy, if it is another boy....just don't want to end up a bitter old woman who spends the rest of her life looking on jealously at other women and their daughters.

I'm sorry that your dealing with all this, Mommyof3boys. It's upsetting that your big, happy, news has had a damper thrown over it :( I feel I've got to play devils advocate here, though. I've been in your sisters position before and I was hurt to find out such news over facebook. There are some things that I think are so special, like your pregnancy, that family should be told face to face or with a phone call. I think facebook is becoming so much a part of our lives that lines can get blurred but I know my mom and best girlfriend would've been hurt and angry if they found out that I was expecting through a facebook photo, only minutes before my facebook "friends" saw the same news. There's something exciting and flattering for your family to be in on the secret a few weeks before you make it official on facebook. It's nice to feel that you've been trusted with the inside scoop, and maybe your sister feels that you don't trust her. I'm not saying that you're in the wrong here, I'm just saying that I can appreciate where ALL of you are coming from and I hope you can work it out with your sister soon. I don't think that ignoring her is the way to go here, afterall, she's your sister and I'd have given my left boob for a sister. LOL. She's only hurt because she loves you and wanted to share in your news earlier. Just my 2 cents, hope I haven't made things worse for ya. :)

I can relate to what Jadis said. I was little hurt when a good friend announced her third pregnancy on facebook and didn't at least send an email to her close friends first. Yes, it is your baby and your right to announce however you choose, but I can understand why your sister would be hurt. At first when I was reading your post, I was thinking you must live far away and not be very close to your sister, but then I got to the part about you picking up her son from school, so that must not be the case. I can understand your not wanting to face your family when you know their reaction may not be positive, but I can definitely understand why her feelings would be hurt. Sorry.

I haven't announced my pregnancy on Facebook yet, but I have told my good friends and most of my family. I am waiting until we know the gender and then I plan to email my father-in-law first (even though he is a deadbeat who hasn't gotten in touch with us since LAST Christmas) because I do feel he deserves to know before my general FB announcement, because he is the grandfather, even if he is a crappy one. I don't want to announce until after I know gender because I am trying to avoid those "it'll just be another boy" comments like you got.

I think if I were you, I would explain your motivation to your sister, that you were worried about how your family was going to take the news, so you didn't want to do it face-to-face, and that you sent the text so that she and your parents would see it first. And then maybe try to do some things to include her in your pregnancy, like invite her along to a doctor's appointment to hear the heartbeat or something like that.

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Originally Posted by heidih1977

LO123, Jennaesue and Emmy Roo- hear you on the obsessing and GD! I probably think about it a million times a day. When I wake to go to the loo at night I think about it and it's certainly always the last thought that preoccupies my mind before I fall asleep. I am so sick of obsessing over different pregnancy symptoms and every other tiny possible sign this could be a girl. It has definitely been a more difficult pregnancy than the other two, but as we hear over and over again it has nothing to do with gender. The nausea has pretty much abated and now I am contending with heartburn after most meals...the spider veins on my right leg have totally gone out of control and the support tights are a nightmare to wear...am already dreading summer and then I keep thinking all this suffering and it will most likely just be another boy. Terrible I know, especially after all the women that have had losses here, but true. I am actually considering therapy, if it is another boy....just don't want to end up a bitter old woman who spends the rest of her life looking on jealously at other women and their daughters.

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It's funny how we pick things apart, isn't it? I tell myself that having different symptoms doesn't matter, and yet, I was hoping I would have different symptoms this time! My first two pregnancies were very similar (a little nausea early on, enough that I threw up a few times but nothing too bad), and this pregnancy is almost identical to my third - almost no nausea or queasiness. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I was almost hoping to have morning sickness this time because I wanted SOMETHING to be different, lol!

Mommyof3boys - I can totally see where everyone is coming from too. I can see how she could be upset but also at the same time, it's your pregnancy and you can announce it however you want. You weren't intentionally out to hurt anyone of course, I think just give her time to cool down, she'll realize that. And then she will be able to enjoy the excitement with you! I know it's hard but try not to let it bring you down if you can!!! Hope this all resolves quickly for you!

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Originally Posted by Jadis

Just home from my midwives, they've moved my due date up! Now, instead of June 25th, it's June 19th (my birthday!). Wouldn't a girl make a lovely birthday gift for me? Gah! I'm crossing my fingers and toes until our ultrasound in exactly 14 days...the countdown in painful. Today, my babe's heartrate was 150...is that on the high side?

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Glad to hear all went well Jadis!!! What a perfect birthday gift hehe! I'm not sure about the heartbeat, I don't think it matters much! 13 days as of today! Woo hoo!

Today I had my hospital 20 week ultrasound. Yep he's still a baby boy lol! But most importantly, he has all his limbs and all his organs are in the right places and functioning perfectly! I was actually a little nervous for this scan, a girl DH went to school with recently had her baby and the intestines and stomach were on the outside, when you hear stories like that it's so scary and upsetting! A bit more scary when you know them too, so I was glad to hear everything looks perfect. Baby was also measuring a whole week ahead!!! But they didn't change my due date!
We had our maternity photos last night, I will post a couple when I get them back :)