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Thank you babs, you have described exactly how I feel. I think my expectations were falsely high due to my sway and I had such high hopes for a girl. It just seems so final for me too as we are definitely not having any more children after this Bub and I just need to grieve a little. I already love this Bub very much and I know I will love him so much when I finally get to hold him. I am not sad I am having another boy, but instead sad that I will never have my little girl.
I know its so difficult to do, but can you think of it in terms of positive that you did sway so hard ?Quote:
Originally Posted by Kelbear
What I mean is, if you hadn't and had gotten pregnant you might always wonder "What if I had swayed".
Many will disagree with me, but I honestly do think some of us can do all the swaying in the world and still have opposites.
It is a grieving process for sure, and we will all be here to support you without judgement.
I couldn't agree with you more on this! I have been on here for a few years now, and I've seen people have FANTASTIC sways with not being control freakish have opposites, while others basically do only like 2-3 things (not really swaying at all) get their desired gender. Swaying can give you a false sense of hope- that's how I felt when I heard boy the last time I swayed. I didn't have any gender preference, but when I heard boy from my MaterniT21 results I felt the wind taken out of me. I felt like I lost something.Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsSparkles
Now, my second sway, I'm totally preparing for our fourth boy! While I feel like I had a much better sway and had a chance to do things differently, I know realistically we may be "set" for boys.
(((Huge Hugs)))
[emoji170][emoji1379]DS1, [emoji577]DS2, & [emoji602]DS3[emoji170]
[emoji166]EDD 9/30/2017 [emoji1317]for pink[emoji166]
https://lmtm.lilypie.com/Tub9m6.png
Perhaps that is the charm ?Quote:
Originally Posted by XXforhubby
Letting go of the expectation of a girl ?
Who knows!
It's such a complex thing, and is being studied more and more.
I read this study about men with more brothers having boys, and that plays right in our family...husband is from all brothers, bro in law has all brother...who in turn have all sons.
The study is here
But then there are people on these boards for whom that doesn't hold true at all !
That's a really fascinating study. My husband is an only child so hard for me to look into his family tree (he doesn't even know his father). However his father was one of two boys so maybe it holds true.
Letting go of the expectation of a girl though...easier said than done. It's been 4 years since my oldest son was born and the entire time I've still believed I would at one point have a daughter. And each time I was told I would not, it has crushed me. I wish I was being overdramatic but literally it has felt like that.
A lovely mum at our school who has 4 girls, 3 of which are in their 20s now, told me the other day that her eldest daughter, is expecting a baby boy! This will be the first boy born into the family for several generations, as she had all sisters herself, had all granddaughters, and all nieces! She's ecstatic about finally having a grandson, as she longed so much for a little boy of her own. So very excited for her!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mummyof4boys
That's fanatstic !
Wonder if the baby daddy has lots of brothers or sister, would be interesting to see if the Newcastle study holds any water with them.
Mummy- that is a great story. How exciting for their family.
Well I did it, 22 weeks now and I finally told my mom on Sunday and my boss yesterday. My mom's birthday was this weekend so we bought her a cake, I put candles on, lite them and as we started to sing to her then I actually brought the cake and put it in front of her and it said "Happy Birthday It's a GIRL June 2017" She immediately saw the it's a girl part and freaked out. We didn't get to finish signing because she jumped out of her chair and hugged me and freaked out. Then she started to cry. I think she had all but given up that I would ever have kids since I am 35 and have been married for 10 years and there was a time when we said we might not have kids. I never once told her or any family that we for sure wanted kids someday. Needless to say, she is very very excited.
Talk with my boss went well too but got me pretty stressed out about maternity leave and being away from work. I know I will get judged for this so I don't want to go into too much detail, but I have no intentions of being away from work long or even at all (work from home) but I still have to figure out the details.
Now we have to tell the in laws before we can announce to the rest of the family and friends. I don't want to, but I have to because the bump won't hide much longer. I am actually sad that I even had to tell boss and mom. It was fun having a secret.
What a super special way to tell your Mum !
Congratulations :)
Don't worry about getting judged about the maternity leave !
"Those that matter don't mind, and those that mind don't matter!" -one of my fave quotes when people are being douchey ;)
GirlieCat. Must be so nice to get the news out. What a nice way you told your mother. I think it is impressing how long to manage to keep it a secret. How are you going to tell your in laws?
Mother to 3 boys ❤️ and pregnant with a baby girl due in June 2017 [emoji120]. DW (41) [emoji1326] DH (38) [emoji144]