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Claire, you could have been me :-) I feel exactly the same about my friend who was struggling to conceive for 3 years and now is due with her first daughter to be borne somewhere next week. And also I'm so much jealous when my other friends post their cute daughter's pictures on FB, I do adore my sons but this GD keeps poisoning my life, I even feel I cannot enjoy my sons the way I should because of my heavy desire for a daughter.. I feel bad about being like this and have such feelings for my friend, sometimes I just hate myself for this, but cannot do anything about it. My DH even suggested I should consult a psychologist but I do not feel it will help me in any way, I'm just glad that this site exists and we can freely speak about our feelings here.....
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BIG HUGS! You're not petty! I went through this with my SIL and best friend, smiled and all "congrats!" to them to their faces (and they both wanted girls too), and sobbed my heart out to my mom (lol poor mom). I love my niece and bf's dd VERY much, and I guess what really helps is that both my SIL and bf absolutely adore my boys and think they are gorgeous and gush over them, etc. I still get a little pang now and then about the clothes or some other girly thing but it's nowhere NEAR as bad as it used to be. :)