ITA with this; even if you have to drive a couple of hours to get to another doc I would definitely have a second opinion on something of this magnitude. The fact that the doctor can't make time to speak to you herself would make me take DH to another doctor based on that alone; if she wants to perform surgery on your DH that could render him infertile, that's MAJOR, and you deserve a doctor who will fully and completely address your concerns. Not a doctor who can't find time to speak to you.
Hope this all gets sorted out soon though; I can imagine how stressful it is for you both. FX ttc goes well whenever you do decide to proceed.