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How exciting, begonia - I'll be stalking you on Monday. Good luck!
DM - sorry you had to deal with such a jerky doctor. You too, Z - I can't believe a doctor could be so insensitive after a scare like that!
Glad to be of service, DM - I'm happy someone appreciates my chronic chattiness :bigsmile:Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
ITA with the sleeping arrangements; though I don't co-sleep it's because I'm a super, super light sleeper. I wear ear plugs because even DH breathing drives me bonkers, LOL! That said, I can't sleep at all when he's gone! I think it is natural to want someone there, both for kids and adults, especially once you're used to it. Our kids come into our bed pretty frequently. I'm happy that they go to sleep in their own beds, because I think it is important that they learn to sleep on their own ... after all, not many college roomies will let you cuddle up with them ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
Glitter, I like your plan for asking for a shot and deciphering it yourself! I think that if, like you ... I had a nub that got a TON of guesses that were nearly 100% in agreement ... well, I'd probably find out too. Like Zan said it's enough to get your hopes up, and you kind of don't WANT false hopes like that ... if in fact they are false. It sure does look girly :fingers:
Zan will you try to get a nub or no? My babe had no interest in showing it off!
Zan and DM, what absolutely rotten docs! DM I would definitely switch if I were in your position. Even in the medical community there are docs who would be understanding and supportive of your choices. Shocking. And Zan, my goodness, such a traumatic time for a postpartum mom and THAT is what he chooses to say. Ugh.
Princess enjoy your pudding! Oh and Zan the chili mayo on a bacon sandwich?!?! Um, I need to make that. It's only breakfast time here but that sounds fantastic.
Thank you guys so much for the support on finding out! I feel so much peace about it since making the decision that I am sure it is the right thing for me. I'm in the US central time and think I'll probably have an update around lunchtime for all you stalkers :) I wish I could have gotten excited for the surprise but nothing about it excited me. I know I'll be able to enjoy the pregnancy so much more when I can quit obsessing over gender :)
So B, at 17w they can tell pretty easily? I'm so on the fence now...ugh. I enjoyed the surprise last time, it was truly amazing, but with this being my last, I think I may need to find out. If I had a mixed group of B and G I would not care at all and most likely not find out. I'm thinking I'll skip the 13w(was going to try for a nub guess) and go for a scan by one of those fun u/s places. That way I can skip the 18w as I was only going to go with the potential of finding out! Ha! My Dr. can suck it. :D LOL
Begonia - I'd feel really silly actually asking for a nub shot so I'll just see what comes up on screen and what comes off on my pictures and leave it to fate!
I just read through the last page:) thanks for the support ladies:) Z- I honestly think I would said something nasty without thinking, to that Dr of yours. How insanely disrespectful. I'm so sorry. They feel it necessary to say something, it's like they're trained to be a-holes to homebirth transfers. Hugs xoxo
We are going through the rooming discussions too. We have three bedrooms, plus a a large upstairs playroom. I am thinking of putting the two boys in one room with bunk beds -double on bottom, single on top- so they can choose to sleep together in the bottom or apart. Or we might just leave each boy in their own room until the new baby is 1 or 2 as we always cosleep. Or, if the new baby is a boy, we might eventually move the youngest two into their own room as they will be closer in age than the first two. Eventually, we might make our playroom into either a very large bedroom or a master - but then we wouldn't have an ensuite, although the bathroom is next door. Decisions!
DM - that is a pretty crappy attitude for a dr. I used a midwife last time and I got a pretty lukewarm reaction from my Dr. as well but nothing like that.
begonia - good luck at your scan! FX for you.
I had a delux pizza yesterday and it was so good!
How are all you ladies feeling today? The fatigue is really affecting me today. I had an early morning with ds3, and now it's 2pm and I can't keep my eyes open. Normally I'd have a coffee or Pepsi to keep me going, but I usually try to keep to one cup of coffee a day while pregnant, and I already had some this morning. I'm drinking a decaf cappuccino hoping it would fool my body into thinking I was drinking caffeine, but it isn't working. I'm thinking of sneaking upstairs for a 20 minute nap before ds3 wakes up from his nap...and I'm NOT a napper at all, so it must be the pregnancy doing all this.
Yes ma'am! They can tell as early as 16 weeks, and the "fun" u/s places will REALLY work on finding out for you since it's what you're paying for ... so even if they spend 20 minutes just looking for that, they'll do it. So if you do decide to get one scan, I would go to the fun one. They'll listen to you say you want a profile shot, or a great gender shot, or whatever.Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
I do agree, too, that if I had a mixed bag already I could handle waiting. For sure. Even if we had decided to wait with our first child I probably could have handled it. But this time (and I do think swaying and being on this board is NOT helping) I feel like I need to know.
I posted on our ttc boy thread but I am having a WEE bit of guilt about DH not knowing. But ... I think it's like Santa Claus, where we lie to our kids because of the fun experience they get to have. He wants the experience. I don't. And in a perfect world I could be self sacrificing enough to hold out on my end for him, but ... clearly not. I feel bad about it. If he finds out I found out though I know that if he's mad about anything it will be that I didn't tell him how crazy it was making me to not know.
Mocha, I was really exhausted 1st tri. More than any other pg, but part of that I'm sure is due to the fact that you get less rest due to the kids you already have. I definitely indulged in more caffeine than I otherwise would have ... I had a half cup of coffee every morning, and a soda in the afternoon. It's funny bc I am not at all a napper either and I took several in the 1st trimester. Often accidentally falling asleep while my kids were playing :suprise: Luckily DD1 is very responsible, LOL!
Tweedle, decisions decisions! The good thing is it sounds like you have plenty of space, it's just figuring out how you want to use it!
Anyhow ... I'm thinking I might just ask for (obvious) pictures tomorrow at the scan and not have them ACTUALLY tell me. Then I can post them here and everyone can tell me what it is :happy: Then it is more like guessing, right?!? And not like an actual professional told me, so ... not like I reeeeally found out, LOL!
Begonia - tomorrow is going to be wonderful but I can understand you feeling nervous and even guilty. FWIW, I'd want to get a definitive answer because lots of guesses (even if they're mostly the same guess!) still doesn't give you an absolute answer and you might want to go back for another scan because you're still wondering every day! I can't wait to log on when I get home from work :D
I don't have many symptoms at all now. I'm getting a few headaches (this morning I woke up with one so DH got up with DS1 and DS2 but DS3 (23 months) wouldn't get out of his cot until I went to get him so he played in there happily for over an hour while I had my lie in - I kept hearing DH asking if he wanted to get up and he just said 'nooo, mummy'). I've actually gone the opposite to you mocha and I can't sit still, can't stop sorting and tidying! I'm not sure it's anything to do with pregnancy but it's so unlike me - I've never nested in my life and I hate housework! I've been gardening too :D If it weren't for my aching back (I always get an aching lower back in early pregnancy) I could easily forget my 'condition'. No sickness or nausea now, just like my other pregnancies. Why is it that some get so poorly and some not at all, isn't it weird?!
I was just sat here thinking 'what was that other thing I really wanted to post about on the pregnancy thread, ummmm' and I remembered I DO have a strong pregnancy symptom - my brain has gone walkabouts!!!
... and I remembered! Where the heck has my waist gone?! Also, my fingers are like sausages! I think this may be salt rather than pregnancy but I can't believe that I was worried my rings would fall off to weeks ago because I'm not sure I could get them off if I tried now. My colleagues are going to think I'm so useless for piling on all my lost weight before their very eyes!
I've noticed the salt has added instant bloating too, Z. I had the same problem with my rings before - more than once I had one fall off while out and about, but luckily I found them each time. Now they seem to be much more secure. So far my actual weight hasn't gone up, but I'm sure it won't be long....
I feel like I need a support group or something to help me ease off this diet. I've never dieted a day in my life before the LE diet and never paid attention to what was in the food I ate, and now that I don't NEED to track anything anymore, I still find I am! I just can't believe how many calories I eat in a day where I eat quite moderately and with few snacks. Today, for example - I had a small bowl of granola for breakfast, a grilled mozzarella & tomato sandwich for lunch with some chocolate wafer cookies for dessert, a decaf cappuccino in the afternoon, 2 servings of pasta with pesto and parmesan + a few sauteed veggies and some Sour Patch kids (some habits are hard to kick). My calories so far today? 2400, and that's BEFORE my everning snack, which I'm sure to have. If my body's become accustomed to 1500-1800 calories, am I going to pack on the pounds too fast if I'm eating between 2500 and 3000 calories a day (and remember this is a moderate day - I normally eat MUCH more than this). I'm starting to think that in the past I must have regularly eaten over 3000 calories per day, and I'm wondering how I wasn't overweight.
I know, I know - I should just stop tracking all this and enjoy food now that I can eat it - this really isn't me, and I don't know why I even care if I gain weight quickly now. Can you tell I have an obsessive personality? No wonder I have 3 boys...:rolleyes:
Thank all for the pudding support!!! :bigsmile:
I am totally enjoying it too!!
Mocha...sorry I don't know what to say about the diet for you...didn't do one and I don't think I could ever stick to one either! Hope you can ease out of it!!
Hope this finds everyone else doing well! My ms is still blah....I seems to have good days and then really bad days with it....weird...I will be glad when it is over! Saturday was our 6yr anniversary and I has having a really good day....I actually enjoyed going to dinner, to the mall and then a no kids evening at home with my hubby! It was nice!
Tomorrow is our 1st appt. with my Dr. so excited and scared at the same time! Praying he stops counting after 1! :giggle: Don't get me wrong we will love 2 if that is how many are in here...but to be honest I think hubby would run away screaming or die of a heart attack right there! :rofl: So tomorrow we will see if I will be a widow or not!
Oh and I had to tell someone this...yesterday while making my yummy chocolate pudding.....I was looking at the milk I was pouring into the measuring cup thinking "that looks so good...nice cold milk" then I thought to myself "oh how weird was that I don't like milk"......I drink a small glass anyway and it was so good!!! And I really mean I don't like milk don't and won't drink it...I will only have milk in my cereal...and I have never ever craved milk with my other pg's....How weird is that???
princess - I know what you mean about hoping there's only 1 in there. DH will definitely have a heart attack if we're having twins again!!!
Oh man I was right there with y'all keeping FX for one baby! Obviously love what you get, twins, boy, girl, what have you .... but we all have our preferences!
LOL about craving milk now, Princess!
Mocha, re: the girl diet, I rarely dieted, have always been more like you say .. ate a ton and just didn't think about it, and stayed thin... I also trained for marathons though. And my "ton" of food was very girl-diet friendly in that it was low-nutrient, high-sugar though. Like a 3000 calorie day could realistically have been made up of half calories from candy and cake. That said in college I did fall into the whole calorie-counting obsession (like the LE girl diet) and it was VERY hard to break those habits. I am a perfectionist, I like having rules and structure and definitely am obsessive (hence why I must find out what I'm having, LOL, but oh my, the examples I could give!) kinda girl. It might take you some time but you'll get back to your old normal. Weight-wise and mentally.
So today I decided on a different plan of attack (inspired by you Zan! You're right, I need a definitive answer today!) and I am going to have them SHOW me the parts so there's no doubt, and tell me for sure (probably still go for the writing it down, unless the parts are super obvious), but I'm NOT going to have them give me any pictures to take home that show gender. That way if DH somehow finds them I can always say that yes I had a scan, but they weren't able to get a good enough shot to show gender :bigsmile: The lengths I am going to to protect his surprise while still protecting my sanity.... goodness.
I will be SO happy to have this answered today! I really feel like I'm going to be good with another girl ... obviously hoping for a boy, but thinking I'll avoid GD this time for sure. This being the last baby I'm just super happy to even have it. For a long time DH was only a 2 baby kinda guy, so this is my bonus and I'm going to love every bit of it!
Sounds like a great plan, begonia! Best of luck today!
Thank you Mocha! It's 2 hours away and I'm totally on pins and needles now ... YIKES! So happy to be finding out though :)
OMG!!!! Today is the day! I'm so freakin excited for you, B!!! I totally hear you about the "bonus" baby:) My hubby was more than happy with 2 and I even agreed to 2 before we were married!!! LOL I begged my DH for #3 and #4 took a year of convincing!
I keep having second thoughts....I remember the feeling of guilt that you talk about in your previous post....and I remember needing to "fake" my surprise at the birth. To be honest with you, that was the worst:(With my last I was shocked(and everyone could tell I was shocked)because I was certain he was a "SHE". If I find out I'm having a girl at the birth...my shock at the end will be so obvious and I will cry buckets at the birth:) If I know before hand, it won't be like that.....Ugh. I hate not knowing, and my hubby said he didn't want to find out the last time I talked to him. I'm sure I could say, 'too bad, so sad, I'm finding out' but I know he'll say- "don't tell me!". Grrrr......I don't know. Maybe I'll just wait until the 17w mark and decide then. I have another 6w of thinking to do....
Mocha- I'm so certain that before tracking calories, I was eating over 3000 a day! I don't tend to gain weight quickly unless I'm coming off of a diet, so I guess my body can burn a lot of what I take in. Maybe it's the same for you? I wouldn't worry too much:) Just step on the scale a few times a week to watch, and forget about the diet:)...easy for me to say, hey? LOL
Z- I'm so jealous you don't get sick!!! OMG what I do for a day with no m/s. Sigh.
Princess- Now I want chocolate pudding......hehehe
Girl 3! Will post more later but am ok!
begonia - congratulations on another gorgeous baby girl! :HH:
Congratulations Begonia, I'm glad you're ok but {hugs} in case you need them!
For those with m/s...when did it start? I find it odd that I haven't been sick at all yet - I've always started to get it before my BFP. Is it a sign that I won't get it badly this time, or can it come later and be just as bad?
Congratulations B!!! Hugs from me as well, just in case you need a wee one :) I have to say that 3 of a kind is lots of fun!! xoxoxo
M- mine starts at 6w on the nose but this time didn't start until 7w. It's just as bad:( I hope for your sake it isn't!!! I really hate this part of pregnancy.
Begonia - conngratulations on your new baby! Hugs if you need them... (personally, i would love your family make up!) Hope you are doing okay.
I actually had moments of nausea since before I got my BFP. The constant sick feelings have slowly increased since getting my BFP and it has been pretty constant since about 4.5 wks. I am worried about it getting worse as I don't know if I will be able to function. So far no throwing up, though. I read it can start at week 5, 6, 7 but if you don't have it by about week 9, you should be okay.
My first pregnancy I had no morning sickness, at all. Second pregnancy, I threw up about five times, but felt good most of the time. This time it is constant. Does anyone know if morning sickness increases with each pregnancy? Or is it just individual?
Hi girls flava here!http://i116.photobucket.com/albums/o...g-Smiley-1.gif
thanks mocha for invite:bigsmile:
Im due in June but there is no june thread:suprise:
Ummm what for now...:think: first I hope baby sticks and healthy!
Im also scared of twins and Im trying hard to quit this damn pig out diet!!!
Would that be ok now? In a way Im scared that if I start eat less I have a m/c .
have to go out and buy even bigger jeans!:hair:
Congratulations Begonia! I am biased but I think three of a kind is SUPER!
DM--so now you are gonna find out too??? I'm so confused if I should or not. I still have a few weeks to decide.
Mocha--not sure what you can do about the diet, are you not too sick? I would think that would be enough to stay off any diet and eat what sounds appetizing.
Nope, Glittergirl - not sick in the least. I could eat my body weight in food at every meal if I let myself....
I do need hugs so thank you! I'm really not having GD, at least nothing like last time ... and I'm really, REALLY happy to know because seriously, I was NOT thinking about girls names at all. I really was hoping we wouldn't have to find one. So now I know I need to take that seriously, and I need to get on it so DH quits referring to the bean as our boy name. I'm really disappointed he'll never have a son. He loves our girls to bits and thank goodness they aren't princesses at all, but still... there are all kinds of father/son things I know he'd love to do. And he's his father's only son so there goes the family name. And I would have loved to have a little mini-DH because obviously I think he's a great man, and now ... you know. None of that will come, because I'm definitely not having 4.
So I can see the greatness of 3 of a kind, but ... it's definitely not what I was hoping for. But I wouldn't change a thing because this baby is meant for our family.
Lots of hugs, Begonia - I felt the same way when I found out I was having ds3.
Mine has totally increased with each pregnancy! Plus it lasts for longer each time:(Quote:
Originally Posted by tweedledeedum
I don't know GG! Ugh! I secretly found out with DS1 and DS2 (and yes I told no one...I impressed myself!) but I waited for DS3 and loved the surprise at the end. I went to the Dr. and got a u/s req. for an early scan but I don't think that the u/s tech will actually look for a nub, and I would either want to know FOR SURE or not at all so I would need to get a later u/s anyway, just to confirm. And I talked to my Dr. about getting an u/s req just for a placental check(I don't want any u/s's at all during this pregnancy but that's the only way i'll find out what I'm having so i was trying to find a way to do this...) because I don't like the 45 min long u/s's, and she looked at me like I was nuts...and said no. So the only way I can go in and get a fast gender check and leave without a hassle is going to the fun scans....$200 dollars later:(Quote:
Originally Posted by Glittergirl
I'm so on the fence! I think it's boy number four, my hubby wants a curling team and would love another son:) I know he'd be thrilled if it was a girl...but more so for me because he knows how much this means to me. So in the end, it's just me that really cares. I hate having GD during the pregnancy so I really have to be honest and do some soul searching before making up my mind. the nice thing about it all is that I have a beautiful boy name that I love. I can actually see my fourth little boy and picture him having fun with his brothers. :HH: How many weeks do you have before your scan, GG??? What are your thoughts??
Oh B, I wish I was close and could give you a great big hug. xoxoxoQuote:
Originally Posted by begonia
I'm crying over here....It's made me rethink this whole finding out thing. And it's not because I feel bad or sorry for you(I'm sad that you are sad....iykwim), it's knowing that it's the same thing for me- I won't have 5....and like you said....there's some things that I'll never get to do. My hubby won't get to walk our daughter down the aisle, no girly shopping trips, no wedding dress, and it's not the same when your son has a child in comparison to a daughter(and you all know how into birth I am!), no sewing girly dresses, the list goes on. I know that as much as I tell myself I won't be too upset....I know I'm going to be crushed for awhile, be it at the birth or before. :( OMG I'm sorry to make this about me.....what a cow I am. Anyway, I wanted to say, I feel for you. I don't know exactly what's going through your mind right now but I know all about the hope and the disappointment. Much love to you, Hun. xoxo
Hugs again Begonia. I know that it is still settling in- we all know how you feel. :)
Just did a quick search in my town and i can get a no-frills, 2D, 5-10min u/s for $90 :) 2D is what normal u/s's usually are right? They can tell the sex, right? At least I won't break the bank if I do decide to do this.
Another thing about finding out that I just thought about- my 5.5yo son is so certain this little one is a girl....(but he felt that way about DS3 as well) that I want to really talk him down, kinda like what you'll be doing with DH, B. He knows this is the last baby and he knows that we would all love a boy or a girl, but I'm afraid he'll be so down when he finds out he doesn't get a sister. Ugh...decisions.
DM - how do you find a private ultrasound place? I know it's a while until I could get a gender scan, but I did some searches, and all I came up with was one place in Toronto and one in Mississauga. There MUST be one closer to me, right?
DM - my boys were convinced DS3 would be a girl too and I kind of started to go along with it as if they had some kind of 6th sense. When my mum told DS2 he had a new baby brother he refused to believe it and was adament he had a new baby sister! You know, I never even considered that we wouldn't have a girl or that we should do something to try to get one before this pregnancy - I just thought it would happen. I don't know why it didn't occur to me!
Begonia - more {hugs}. I get upset about the things I think DH will miss out on if he doesn't have a daughter but I'm not at all sure that he feels even half as disappointed as I do. Is there any chance that the things you're feeling sad about for your DH aren't as important to him? Your girls sound wonderful and perhaps he doesn't feel the 'gap' of not having a son that you imagine - I have no idea of course but I hate to think of you feeling so badly for him if he's happy with his lot. Isn't it a strange life, some of us so desperate for a girl and having a string of boys and some of you wanting a boy and having a string of girls. We really aren't in control and I'm sure we all have the babies that are meant for us. This little girl is going to bring you so much love and happiness :D
No, no, no ... it helps, it really does, to have other people totally get it. So I love how you made it about you, and I really, really hope you do get your DD... and that everyone can get their DG really.Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
I was definitely more disappointed over DD2 than I am over this one, and honestly I am SURE DH will be fine. He's wonderful with our ladies. In fact when I asked him if he was disappointed when we found out our second was also a girl, his comment was "Now I have to give TWO of them away?!?"
As for the finding out/not finding out I was pretty torn up with the not knowing. I really am glad to be out of that misery. I just went for a nice long walk and while I couldn't think of a girl name, LOL, I did spend most of it being grateful for all that I have and not thinking about what I don't. One of my best friends lost her 4th child, a 4 year old boy, earlier this year and for me to spend more than an hour grieving a son I never even had is more self-indulgent than I can be at this point in my life. I'm not judging anyone for their GD, it is a very real and honest and HARD thing to deal with... I just really am not even going to allow myself to wallow in something that really isn't THAT big of a deal. I wanted three children, I am going to have three children, and I'm going to focus on how fantastically lucky I am from here on out with this pregnancy. It's just a shame I can't go buy some fab outfits right now :cool:
So anyhow ... only you know how you'll handle the news. I'm happy to say that I was right in thinking I'd be glad to know. Give yourself time to think through it and sort it out and I bet you'll know the right answer for yourself!
Zan, I do think I am magnifying what DH will feel, I absolutely do. When I was out on a walk now I was thinking about how I wish it was ME missing out on having a daughter (which, actually ... I only ever wanted boys, funny how that works! Wouldn't change a thing obviously!!) because it is easier to handle your own disappointment than to see someone you love disappointed. At least for me it is. I think he'll be fine. Our oldest DD couldn't be more of a tomboy ... they are going camping together in 2 weeks, she loves to golf with him, etc. And DD2 is pining away for a pet snake ... LOL. There isn't a Disney Princess (movie or toy) in our home yet! But maybe girl #3 is going to be our little princess, who knows?!? It will be fun to see who she is though. I can't wait :)Quote:
Originally Posted by zanacal
Thank you the hug Spicy! FX for you!
And thank you everyone for being so great about it; I'm glad I have a place to work through it all with people who really get it :)
There's one in Rockwood...about an hour away...still too far? I'll keep looking for you:)Quote:
Originally Posted by Mochagirl
http://www.babybonus3dultrasound.com/services/
At the bottom of that linked page there's a $100 gender only u/s :)
I think you make a great point Begonia, that we can get different things from our relationships with each of our children no matter what the sex. I'm going to take a leaf out of your book and focus not on whether my children are boys or girls but on the fabulous qualities they have individually and together. That's so very sad about your friend's son, perspective is easy to come by when you see others experience such tragedy.
Thank you again :) I am so sorry to hear about your BF's little boy. OMG I cannot even begin to think about the possibility that I will outlive any of my children :( :tissue:Quote:
Originally Posted by begonia
After reading the bolded portion of your post, it really gave me something to think about. Thank you :) :HH: I will not love my child any less, we will all be thankful that we have that little person in our lives no matter what we have, I will feel the disappointment for awhile, no doubt, but it will go away and I know I'm going to stop focusing on the "what-if"(what if I have one more) after this baby is here as we will not have anymore kids. I almost think there will be some closure for me. For 4 years now I have hoped for a daughter...4 years of thinking, obsessing, trying for another, trying to convince my hubby for another....I will be so happy to not have to think about that anymore. I can focus on enjoying what I have :) it's sad to think that GD can do this to a person.... :( I'm going to find out and put this stress and obsessing to rest. I'll let you guys know, when I find out but no one else will know. I'm really good at keeping secrets:) Thank you for taking the time to write that out, B:) I needed to read that. xoxoxo
Z- I never thought I'd be in a place like this on the net.....pining away for a daughter. I was raised mainly by my mom, with a sister....had lots of girlfriends....I stupidly assumed I would have a couple girls. And, like B said above.....I would feel bad right now if I had 3 girls and I was hoping that DH could have a son. Ugh. GD is such a mess.
[QUOTE=DoulaMama;81527]There's one in Rockwood...about an hour away...still too far? I'll keep looking for you:)
I don't even know where Rockwood is! I was hoping to find a local one so I could do it without telling dh. I don't think he'd ever approve of me spending money on something I can get for free.
Do you do Google searches for 'private ultrasound' to find them?