Thanks so much and huge congrats on your BFP!!!
Thanks so much and huge congrats on your BFP!!!
Just want everyone to know that while one attempt is a good sway tactic, it's not critical. You can still get girls with more than one attempt. I just want everyone to start off with one attempt and drop all other less effective sway tactics like ph, timing, frequency, herbs/antihistamines, etc before adding attempts.
Unfortunately, I didn't get a positive opk. I used the Clear Blue tests before with my other pregnancy but decided to try a different ovulation kit brand for my first month of ttc. However, the different brand never showed me a positive opk even after following directions and taking it daily. I was planning on buying and using the clear blue ovulation tests the next month and Atomic was kindly guiding me on how to use it effectively.
Really? Ahhhh. That makes me feel better. It's just I read that as the most common denominator in the succesful sways. And still haven't seen a sway result from e4d or more attempts... thank you, though. I'm feeling better about my sway then
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Have you not ever seen our stats thread? https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum...your-sway.html
That's so interesting. Thank you. It was very confusing but I got it. Most things have pretty high, over 50%, in the stats. What was interesting was seeing how the percentage changes for the better the longer you are on the diet. That was very interesting. The e4d I didn't see much on.
Thanks
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That's because we stop doing the handful of things that got worse than 50-50. We would be a little kooky to keep doing things that got worse than 50-50. We keep them in there to show people NOT to do them.
Since the overall success rate of the site is about 69%, we can look at things that have gotten lower than that, and say "hmm these things are certainly not helping anything, and may even be hurting in some cases, because they're WORSE than the site as a whole." Things that are about 69% we can say "this may or may not be helping, but it isn't hurting." A few things have better than the overall success rate of the site and those things we can say with a fairly high level of confidence "this is actually doing something." So that helps you to thin out the things that aren't doing anything from those that are.
e4d actually is in there and it's gotten about 69% which is the same as the site as a whole. So that indicates that it's not hurting and may even be helping our success rate. We would need a side by side study to prove that done in people who weren't doing other things to sway, but it's a good assumption that it's at worst, neutral, at best, helping.
Hi Atomic, so I was looking at my Fertility Friend charts from my 4 previous pregnancies. (2 that were successful, 1 chemical pregnancy and 1 recent miscarriage). I definitely noticed a weird trend, which could be nothing but worth mentioning to you to see your thoughts. For both my chemical pregnancy and my successful 2nd child (1st one I didn't chart as I got pregnant first time trying after getting off birth control), I BD the day before my positive OPK and got pregnant. I tried for 6 months with my second child and every other time which was unsuccessful, I always skipped that day before the positive OPK. I BD all around that day but not on the day except for the 2 pregnancies (chemical and second child). With my 3rd child and miscarriage, I didn't have OPK's that worked or at least were not working so it's hard to judge those but the charts look similar to those other successful pregnancies. Anyways, I am thinking that may be a good thing to consider at the moment while I start BD again. But how can I figure out that day...the day before a positive OPK? If I use the clearblue ovulation tests, they may not just give me two days of high fertility before the peak and could give me multiple days or no days, etc...I wasn't sure if I should just buy the older version of the clearblue ovulation tests (the ones I used for the chemical and second child) with just peak day and just guess and hope I get the day before the positive OPK correct or if the 4 day test would be somewhat helpful? I would love to hear your thoughts. Thanks so much!!
That's the problem - unless you're clairvoyant, you can't.
There are really only 3 days in the whole cycle you have a decent chance of conception. The day before pos OPK, the day OF pos OPK, and the day after pos OPK. So it's really not proving anythign that you happened to have 2 conceptions that day. it's a 1 in 3 chance that it will be one of those days. I do not think (and science doesn't support) that this indicates that you can only get pregnant that one day of the cycle. Studies show best chances of conception o-2 (usually day before pos OPK) and O-1 (usually day of OPK), with somewhat less the day after OPK and a small minority O-3. That's just the days of the cycle people GET pregnant so it's not at all unusual to see this type of pattern.
We have some people who try this method where they get a clearblue and BD the day of the second flashy smiley. It's ok if you want to try it, but do be aware it rarely works out the way people think. Lots of people get many flashy smileys, or go straight to peak with NO flashy smileys, or have a peak and then O is delayed for some reason - it just really doesn't work in any predictable way.
It's not something I'd bother with personally but it is your sway, your way.
Thank you so much Atomic!! As usual, you are so knowledgeable and always put me at ease. That all makes perfect sense and I just happen to get lucky those times of conception and who really knows when it actually happened. It is so interesting looking at the charts though. So much more complicated than anyone would imagine. I trust you and don’t plan to rely on the flashy smiley. As you mentioned, it will be hard to know if a 3rd smiley will just happen to come the next day or none at all. It’s so tricky and not reliable but the best we have for all our irregular ovulation days.
So when would you BD? When I receive a solid smiley? Should I just get the tests that only show peak fertility so only solid smileys or do you suggest trying the tests with flashy smileys and solid smileys? I only plan to do the one attempt so I want to try my best to BD on the right day (or at least as best as I can).
Thanks so much again for all your help. It is definitely a tricky situation but I plan to try my best again at doing a good sway or one to the best of my abilities.
I always recommend the day of the solid smiley simply because it's easy and is good odds of conception. But follow your heart - it's ok to try for a month on the second flashy or even to decide what do to kind of at the last minute - when u see that flashy ask yourself "do I want to try today" and do it!
I have no preference on the OPK, whichever you like best.
Good luck!
Thank you! I appreciate it. One last thing, since the ovulation tests are unpredictable...what should I do if I BD on a second flashy smiley (my one attempt) and then I get another flashy smiley? I guess I would stick with that attempt unless I get a 4th flashy smiley and then finally a solid smiley, then maybe I should try again. If it looks like it will be 4 days before I actually ovulate, then maybe consider trying again. Does that make sense?
Also, when is the best time to test? The clearblue tests that have the flashy smileys say to test with first morning urine, but I have always heard that they are not like pregnancy tests and to actually test mid afternoon and try to drink less/hold your urine but maybe that is the other version with no flashy smileys...not sure.
As I write all this, I see why they are so unreliable. Every person is different and their hormones respond differently to the tests and then each person may test differently, etc...its crazy!
Thanks again! Sorry for the continuous questions.
Well, that's the catch with the method. What I would do is if the test goes solid within 2 days, stick with attept you've had. If 4 or more (or you get a 4th day of flashy) have another attempt. If it's the "no man's land" of 3 days, either use the rule "for better odds of pink stick with the attempt you've had, for better odds conception have another attempt" or flip coin if you can't decide what to do.
While I generally suggest following the directions most brands of OPK are best used after lunch. Clear blue is supposed to be ok to use in the morning, but it's after lunch that the concentration of LH in urine is at its peak.
Thank you! I guess we will see what happens. With 2 of my other pregnancies, I used the clearblue tests that only showed one solid smiley but now I bought the clearblue with flashy smileys. I probably should of just stuck with the old tests but I figured if they new ones work well for me, why not give them a chance. With the old tests, I could test in the afternoon where LH is highest, but it looks like they want you to test in the morning with the new tests and I am not sure how accurate it will be. Fun times ahead. LOL.
keep us posted - that's how I learn is via your guys' experiences.
Hi Atomic, so interesting update that I wanted to share with you. I started the OPK on cycle day 12 (I should of probably started a day or two sooner so the test could have had a base line regarding my estrogen levels) but it came back negative. I did the test in the morning when I just woke up. I think if I had started a day or two sooner it would have showed up as high fertility with the flashy smiley. So when I tested again in the morning after waking up on cycle day 13, it came up high fertility. I read on the instructions that once you get high fertility you can test more often as long as you drink normally and don't pee within 4 hours. I decided to test again later in the afternoon around 3:30pm and got a peak/solid smiley. I wasn't expecting that and was quite surprised. And of course once you get a peak on the test, the solid smiley doesn't go away for 48 hours. I was worried that it was an error or I did something wrong. So I had some other old strip OPK tests that didn't work for me before but decided to use them to see if it correlated. Well, it did so I figured it was a good idea to BD that night. I quickly put in some rephresh (just to use for the first month of ttc) so it would be at least 8 hours before BD. This morning I took another OPK strip (not the clearblue obviously as I can't) and it came back positive again and even more clear that yesterday's strip. So I am assuming that I will ovulate later today, tonight, tomorrow in the early morning hours or the afternoon tomorrow since its typically 24-48 hours.
So what I found interesting is that I wasn't going to test yesterday afternoon but instead just this morning. So if I hadn't tested yesterday afternoon, I would have seen the positive OPK/peak this morning and BD tonight and I might have missed my chance or maybe not. But I know its better to have sperm waiting for the egg and I might ovulate today so I wouldn't have had that if I BD tonight. I know people can obviously get pregnant soon after ovulation but I wanted the sperm to be waiting and ready. So not sure when I will actually ovulate but so glad that I did test again and hopefully it works!! It makes me think back to my other kids and ttc and maybe I missed the opportunity to have sperm waiting by not testing again in the afternoons.
Yes as you've deduced starting Clearblues on CD 12 is too late. It needs the earlier hormone levels in your cycle to compare to (that's part of how it works)
So you did BD?? Sorry I'm having a hard time understanding the timeline.
We can't know on the basis of any of this whether you've Oed or not yet though (or how many hours it will be.) OPK just cannot get it that exact for us, unfortunately. YOu may have ovulated very quickly after the Clearblue and then the LH in your urine with the other brand of test was just leftovers. Or, you may not have ovulated yet (even if the test had been negative the next day!) Positive OPK only measure hormones in urine that signal ovulation, and NOT whether or not you've Oed yet.
Yes, I did BD last night. So hopefully I haven't ovulated yet. Based on tracking my temperature on Fertility Friend and other signs like having EW CF and cramps today, I believe I will be ovulating later today or tomorrow. Obviously, you never know when you will ovulate and as you said the OPK aren't 100% reliable but fortunately, I have had other signs to sort of help me deduce when I might be ovulating. Like you said, the amount of time the LH hormone is in your body varies from person to person and probably from cycle to cycle so it makes it even harder to pinpoint ovulation. Hopefully since I got the high fertility indication yesterday morning and then the peak indication in the afternoon, it notices a shift in my hormones and picked up the LH hormone. And hopefully I will ovulate 24-48 hours later and not 8-12 hours later (meaning I ovulated already), but who knows. Either way, I was able to BD so we will see what happens. Sorry if my timeline confused you. I confused myself at times, too. LOL
Update....Atomic, so of course things have gotten a little confusing - again OPK's and figuring out ovulation is as usual tricky. Not sure if you would know this and I may have to do some research of my own, but if I ovulate sometime today, my morning temp would only go up tomorrow, right? It wouldn't of gone up this morning? The reason I ask is because of the following...
I took the clear blue OPK Tuesday morning and got my first flashy smiley and then tested again Tuesday afternoon and got a solid smiley. I BD Tuesday night. My temp was 96.7 on Tuesday morning (it was 96.7, too, Monday morning in case it helps to see some more numbers) and then Wednesday my temp moved to 97 ( I did take it 30 minutes later than Tuesday morning due to my alarm not working for some reason) and then this morning it was 97.1. So it hasn't shown a big jump yet which it may tomorrow if I am ovulating today - I think/assume but not sure how it would works. I hope that makes sense....I am just trying to use all the variables I have to make sure I did indeed ovulate.
The solid smiley clear blue OPK should turn off by this afternoon (it would have be 48 hours) so maybe I should test it again to see what happens? Also, my CM is creamy today. It was more EW yesterday. But I did use rephresh Tuesday so not sure if that would affect anything. What are your thoughts/suggestions? Thank you!!
Yes, it should go up the day after ovualtion, but honestly temping can be quite unpredictable and not reliable as we would hope it was. So only by looking at the overall pattern can we tell what happened. It isn't always so obvious that there's a big temp rise.
I woudln't bother testing again with the Clearblue because the Clearblue detects changes in your hormones to tell it when the surge happens. I would have sex every 4 days from now on just in case of delayed ovulation.
Yes, your CM can be changed by the RepHresh and additionally I don't think the EWCM is that reliable either.
Thank you so much! It looks like a lot of things aren't very reliable when it comes to predicting your ovulation day and you just have to try your best. And yes, it is hard to interpret your chart based on your temp. It is always different and most of the time not obvious. Definitely is confusing. I appreciate the advice and help. Thanks!!
:agree: yep that's right. We use the tools we have and do our best but I don't want you guys to get too hung up on pinning down O day. Just not necessary.
Hi Atomic! So I did get pregnant with the cycle I was talking about prior but wanted to wait for the ultrasound before sharing with you. I did get blood taken twice a few days after I got a positive pregnancy test required by my doctor to make sure everything looked normal after what happened in my last pregnancy. The ultrasound was last week and measuring exactly 7 weeks (based on my period I was 7 weeks that day) and heart rate of 134. Hoping it all continues to look good.
Just for your reference, I ended up BD the day I got a solid smiley. It’s been awhile so just to explain what happened, I took the OPK in the morning and it showed a flashy smiley. I wasn’t going to test again that day but decided to in the afternoon and it ended up being a solid smiley. So I BD that night and it was our one attempt. We did BD 5 days prior because I didn’t think I would ovulate so soon but I don’t believe that would affect the one attempt or am I wrong? Really hoping it worked and I will get a girl. Also, I wanted to see your thoughts on the Ramzi theory and Nub theory on ultrasounds. Are they accurate at all and the people using them to make guesses? Thanks so much!
Oh wow huge congrats!!
You're quite right, BD 5 days earlier would not affect the one attempt. :agree:
After having seen lots of people send Dr. Ramzi himself $10 to guess on their ultrasounds and he guessed incorrectly, I don't think there's anything to it at all. And nub shot can work - isn't 100% but is definitely helpful, just be sure you're waiting till the end of the 12th week, even into the 13th to have your nub ultrasound done. EArly 12th week, 11th, 10th are NOT reliable as all babies look like girls at tha tpoint.
Thank you so much!! Really hoping everything continues to look good and it’s a girl!! Hoping the things I did helped some and worked! I tried not to stress and be more relaxed about it but still took my fiber, had coffee, worked out, stuck to diet as best I could, didn’t eat when I woke up, and took folic acid. I also did one attempt, used rephresh earlier in the day and did J&D after 5 minutes. I know it wasn’t perfect but hoping it worked. This is the hardest time, I think. I am sure you went through it, too. Any words of advice? I feel like it is a girl but definitely biased ��
It may have 4 days not 5 when we BD prior to 1 attempt. I need to double check. But that is okay still, right? Not sure why I am stressing about it...bc it’s already over and happened. Ha. Yes, I figured as much regarding the Ramzi theory. It seems crazy that you can look at the location of a placenta and know all. Lol. Hopefully, the next ultrasound my doctor has me do will be after 12 weeks. It’s the genetic one so who knows when she will want to do it. Are you good at the nub theory? It’s confusing to me but I have never been good at interpreting ultrasounds.
even 4 days before is slim to no chance of conception. It was found to be one in 1000 (5 days before is 1 in 10,000, and then 6 days before is 1 in 100,000) in the best and most recent study done on the subject.
My only advice is that you did what you could do and yo have to try to actively turn it over to a higher power, even that higher power is just "luck". Nothing you can do will change the outcome now so just try to focus on your pregnancy in a positive light regardless of gender.
I wouldn't say I'm an expert but I've looked at a lot of nubs. I'm always happy to take a peek at a beautiful baby and give my opinion. :)
Thank you so much! I love your explanation and it definitely puts me more at ease. I did my absolute best and now it’s up to a higher power and luck. It really is a good, healthy way to look at gender swaying. I appreciate it! And I will definitely send my little nugget your way if the ultrasound happens during the right time frame. You’re the best! Thanks Atomic!
Hi Atomic! I just had my 13 week 1 day ultrasound scan and would love to send you some pictures to see what you think. The ultrasound tech gave her guess. The pictures are a bit bright but not sure if that matters. The machine my obgyn practice uses seems to always make the pictures/details brighter...I dunno. Can I send them to you in a message or what would you prefer? Thanks so much!!
Sure you can post them here or in the ultrasound forum, or email me at atomicsagebrush@gmail.com
Hi Atomic! Two quick questions. I am 17 weeks now and will be able to do the anatomy scan/find out the gender in the next few weeks. Do you know if it’s better to have the ultrasound around 19 weeks or 20.5 weeks (those are my options). Basically, I know they like it between 18-22 weeks so is it better to see more of what’s going on (gender and other anatomy) earlier or later in that time frame?
Also, is there anything else that I can do to sort of figure out the gender that is a little more reliable than other things? Like baking soda thing, Chinese calendar, etc...I figured since I am waiting, I might consider trying something else for fun that’s a little accurate...maybe? Lol.
Anytime from 18-21ish is a great time to see gender.
None of those things are accurate and I don't recommend doing them even for fun. People think they don't mind it going in but then get very upset by them, either hearing things they don't want to hear, or having false hope that is later dashed. My advice is to skip them all.
Hi Atomic! I just wanted to let you know that we found out the gender on Wednesday at 18 weeks and 6 days. It is a GIRL!! I will email you the potty shot for double confirmation :) Thanks so much for all your help these last few months! I greatly appreciate it!
Woohoo!!!! Huge congrats!