Part 2: Due January, February & March 2019

Since this was a surprise for us, and Im a bit older (34) my mom had said "As long as its healthy" but I know shes dying for a girl as well. I dont have much family as they were toxic and I cut them out. My friends all just love babies because they do not have any of their own.

I havent told my in laws because I know thats going to be drama. "Why would you let that happen?" "Oh my god... you know what its going to be like?!" "Theyre gonna be 7 years apart!" and so forth.

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Originally Posted by SurroundedByBoys

Since this was a surprise for us, and Im a bit older (34) my mom had said "As long as its healthy" but I know shes dying for a girl as well. I dont have much family as they were toxic and I cut them out. My friends all just love babies because they do not have any of their own.

I havent told my in laws because I know thats going to be drama. "Why would you let that happen?" "Oh my god... you know what its going to be like?!" "Theyre gonna be 7 years apart!" and so forth.

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My in-laws sound similar to yours -- so we're not telling them and they'll find out at a family wedding when I'll be 20 weeks lol! They said some pretty awful things after DD was born and then after our losses, so I don't feel they get a special reveal. For everyone else, maybe everyone's more quiet because our history of loss is more open... I'm just not used to people necessarily being sensitive enough to figure, "Let's not speculate on the people who have had 8 losses."

And I'm almost 8 years older than my youngest sister and we've always been very close :) So don't sweat the age gap!

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Originally Posted by SurroundedByBoys

Since this was a surprise for us, and Im a bit older (34) my mom had said "As long as its healthy" but I know shes dying for a girl as well. I dont have much family as they were toxic and I cut them out. My friends all just love babies because they do not have any of their own.

I havent told my in laws because I know thats going to be drama. "Why would you let that happen?" "Oh my god... you know what its going to be like?!" "Theyre gonna be 7 years apart!" and so forth.

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That's great that you've got supportive friends and and a supportive mom!

My sister and I are 7 years a part (I was a surprise too!) And we are super close! Age, in my opinion, doesn't determine how close siblings will be, personalities do! [emoji3] also, I imagine your kiddo will be extra helpful and a great older sibling!

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Re: gender issue I'm not coping this week- this wait is just slowly killing all my hope that this is my girl. Im not being a good wife, mother or friend at the moment and I hate myself for it. Im just hiding away really.
We have not told anyone so I have no one to confide in and I just don't know how I will be able to even announce this pregnancy if it is boy number 3 like I think that it is- especially as my ms has disappeared now at 10 weeks.
Everyone will have an opinion- the most likely will be how silly I was to try for a girl and that I should have just gone back to work and stopped having children. My family is very blasé about gender disappointment and my brother and step brother say to me all the time are you just going to keep having babies until you get a girl?
Just got off the phone to my mum and her last comment to me when I said we are having some troubles at the moment was well best just to have two children then and cut your losses! Thanks mum great pep talk :sad:

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Originally Posted by SurroundedByBoys

Since this was a surprise for us, and Im a bit older (34) my mom had said "As long as its healthy" but I know shes dying for a girl as well. I dont have much family as they were toxic and I cut them out. My friends all just love babies because they do not have any of their own.

I havent told my in laws because I know thats going to be drama. "Why would you let that happen?" "Oh my god... you know what its going to be like?!" "Theyre gonna be 7 years apart!" and so forth.

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So sorry your inlaws are like that- just wish people would keep their opinions to themselves!

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Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther

My in-laws sound similar to yours -- so we're not telling them and they'll find out at a family wedding when I'll be 20 weeks lol! They said some pretty awful things after DD was born and then after our losses, so I don't feel they get a special reveal. For everyone else, maybe everyone's more quiet because our history of loss is more open... I'm just not used to people necessarily being sensitive enough to figure, "Let's not speculate on the people who have had 8 losses."

And I'm almost 8 years older than my youngest sister and we've always been very close :) So don't sweat the age gap!

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They sound awful TP- i don't blame you for not sharing your wonderful news with them.

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Originally Posted by kittendreams

Re: gender issue I'm not coping this week- this wait is just slowly killing all my hope that this is my girl. Im not being a good wife, mother or friend at the moment and I hate myself for it. Im just hiding away really.
We have not told anyone so I have no one to confide in and I just don't know how I will be able to even announce this pregnancy if it is boy number 3 like I think that it is- especially as my ms has disappeared now at 10 weeks.
Everyone will have an opinion- the most likely will be how silly I was to try for a girl and that I should have just gone back to work and stopped having children. My family is very blasé about gender disappointment and my brother and step brother say to me all the time are you just going to keep having babies until you get a girl?
Just got off the phone to my mum and her last comment to me when I said we are having some troubles at the moment was well best just to have two children then and cut your losses! Thanks mum great pep talk :sad:

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Kitten, I'm so sorry your family is so insensitive about gender disappointment! Gender disappointment alone is hard enough without others chiming in. You are always welcome to express your feelings and thoughts to us because, I'm sure, we all are going through the same feelings! I cant even think about gender right now without it consuming my every waking thought. I just have to put it in the back of my mind right now until I'm ready to deal.

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I’m so sorry, that’s awful. I was convinced this was a boy, would have bet my first born (lol, ok not really) but I was totally wrong! Everyone guessed boy and they were all wrong too!! There’s definitely still hope!

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Originally Posted by Eighme

Kitten, I'm so sorry your family is so insensitive about gender disappointment! Gender disappointment alone is hard enough without others chiming in. You are always welcome to express your feelings and thoughts to us because, I'm sure, we all are going through the same feelings! I cant even think about gender right now without it consuming my every waking thought. I just have to put it in the back of my mind right now until I'm ready to deal.

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Thanks eighme.
Yes they are insensitive mainly because they all have mixed gender families so they think its funny when other families struggle to get gender balance. I'm sure if they knew what it was like and how it consumes so much of your life they might be more sympathetic.
I really dislike being negative but I'm afraid this week is getting the better of me- I'm trying so hard to shake it off but I just want to curl up and hide away.
Lack of sleep doesn't help either haha!

How are you feeling? You are 6 weeks right?

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Originally Posted by Pretty

I’m so sorry, that’s awful. I was convinced this was a boy, would have bet my first born (lol, ok not really) but I was totally wrong! Everyone guessed boy and they were all wrong too!! There’s definitely still hope!

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Pretty I'm just so happy for you that you are getting your girl- what an amazing life changing feeling xx