Due in December/January/February 2013/14

Blackandgold delivery is all i can think of at the mo and it is really getting me down. Both options suck (go back to UK and be apart from DS1 and DH for 2+ months or deliver here and risk an unnecessary C section / not have adequate care in place in case there is anything wrong with the baby).

How awful to make you hold him in! Women give birth all the time without docs - that just does not make sense. DS1 was traumatic for the opposite reason- the doc was there and just wanted to get him out asap so she could catch a train. His neck muscles were ripped and needed all sorts of treatment to sort it out. I am a whimp and always go for epidural - it has been the only pain relief both times but do not know how ladies can push when they are in such agony.

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Originally Posted by Emily

Blackandgold delivery is all i can think of at the mo and it is really getting me down. Both options suck (go back to UK and be apart from DS1 and DH for 2+ months or deliver here and risk an unnecessary C section / not have adequate care in place in case there is anything wrong with the baby).

How awful to make you hold him in! Women give birth all the time without docs - that just does not make sense. DS1 was traumatic for the opposite reason- the doc was there and just wanted to get him out asap so she could catch a train. His neck muscles were ripped and needed all sorts of treatment to sort it out. I am a whimp and always go for epidural - it has been the only pain relief both times but do not know how ladies can push when they are in such agony.

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Emily! I'm sorry to hear about your horrible experience too and the tough decision you have to make this time around! There really would be no right answer so I'm sorry you're having to stress about that! I can't believe how fast this pregnancy is going and how soon it'll all be over. I keep telling myself I need to just relax and enjoy the moments right now with just my 2 little boys because our house will be rocked for a few months when baby #3 comes until we all settle in!

I'm with you on delivery anticipation! I have already started thinking about a third c section and what the recovery will be like. Ugh wish it was an option for a natural birth even though I know some stories end a little scary but that's not an option for us. I have high blood pressure during pregnancy and normally they take the baby at 39 weeks to keep everyone safe. Although this time my BP isn't as high so we will see!

I also think this pregnancy is flying by! Seems like things will be busy with all the holidays coming up and then right after New Years baby will be here! We will all be busy bees!

Black and Gold sorry about the shower scrubbing! You are nesting early! :-) This time tell the nurse to catch or your husband will! That will teach them to tell a woman in labor to hold on. I can't imagine! You will have a good birth story this time!

Emily-I think it will all turn out fine in the end. You will have a sweet baby and a good birth story I know it!

Aw sorry to hear about the delivery anxieties. I'm a crazy lady that loves giving birth. Gas and air only for me! Though ds3 was back to back wee ratfink! That one was less fun! My first two labours dead quick, ds3 took longer only cos he was back to back! So been told to be on red alert when contractions start lol.

All my babies have required very little pushing and practically delivered themselves! This one already has a tricky vibe about them now. Guess I'll have the added incentive of pushing to see what my baby is though.

Aw be careful with that nesting. Don't overdo it hun xxxx

Ladies you are def having girls! Go pink mad!

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Originally Posted by Waiting4Daisy

Aw sorry to hear about the delivery anxieties. I'm a crazy lady that loves giving birth. Gas and air only for me! Though ds3 was back to back wee ratfink! That one was less fun! My first two labours dead quick, ds3 took longer only cos he was back to back! So been told to be on red alert when contractions start lol.

All my babies have required very little pushing and practically delivered themselves! This one already has a tricky vibe about them now. Guess I'll have the added incentive of pushing to see what my baby is though.

Aw be careful with that nesting. Don't overdo it hun xxxx

Ladies you are def having girls! Go pink mad!

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I'm the same when it comes to labours - they are quite fast and don't require much pushing. We also are waiting until delivery to know the gender so I don't know if I'll be more excited and willing to push, or if I'll be too scared and want to hold the baby in longer for a few more hours of "maybe, just maybe it could be a girl.." LOL!

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Originally Posted by Waiting4Daisy

Aw sorry to hear about the delivery anxieties. I'm a crazy lady that loves giving birth. Gas and air only for me! Though ds3 was back to back wee ratfink! That one was less fun! My first two labours dead quick, ds3 took longer only cos he was back to back! So been told to be on red alert when contractions start lol.

All my babies have required very little pushing and practically delivered themselves! This one already has a tricky vibe about them now. Guess I'll have the added incentive of pushing to see what my baby is though.

Aw be careful with that nesting. Don't overdo it hun xxxx

Ladies you are def having girls! Go pink mad!

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It would be great to have the option of gas and air. In a lot if countries it is epidural or nothing. - i have 'needed' an episiotomy both times so was glad that it was available but would really like the option of something else other than stirrups and docs.

The hospital that i would have to give birth at here give an epidural as standard at 3cm(?!), only like DH to be there for the last push otherwise they send them off to the cafeteria, have crappy little delivery rooms with just a bed and stirrups (no room to walk around, no ball, no real space for DH etc), give oxytocin without your consent, don't like labour to go on too long (tend to whip ladies into surgery for C sections as it is more profitable), ignore requests for the baby not to be scrubbed with antiseptic to make them clean, do not like you to have your baby in the room with you at night and try to sneak a bottle or two in even if you have said breastfeeding only.

There are so many things that they do as standard that I don't want. The midwife said all of that could be done the way that I want but there is no guarantee that they will stick to it on the day. I am so scared they will ignore me and my wishes and switch from English to French or vietnamese so that DH will not understand. We have thought about having the birth plan translated but in the thick of it will tehy stop and read it or just do what they have always done? I have almost decided to go back to the UK except it will break my heart to leave DS1 for so long.

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Originally Posted by Emily

It would be great to have the option of gas and air. In a lot if countries it is epidural or nothing. - i have 'needed' an episiotomy both times so was glad that it was available but would really like the option of something else other than stirrups and docs.

The hospital that i would have to give birth at here give an epidural as standard at 3cm(?!), only like DH to be there for the last push otherwise they send them off to the cafeteria, have crappy little delivery rooms with just a bed and stirrups (no room to walk around, no ball, no real space for DH etc), give oxytocin without your consent, don't like labour to go on too long (tend to whip ladies into surgery for C sections as it is more profitable), ignore requests for the baby not to be scrubbed with antiseptic to make them clean, do not like you to have your baby in the room with you at night and try to sneak a bottle or two in even if you have said breastfeeding only.

There are so many things that they do as standard that I don't want. The midwife said all of that could be done the way that I want but there is no guarantee that they will stick to it on the day. I am so scared they will ignore me and my wishes and switch from English to French or vietnamese so that DH will not understand. We have thought about having the birth plan translated but in the thick of it will tehy stop and read it or just do what they have always done? I have almost decided to go back to the UK except it will break my heart to leave DS1 for so long.

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Emily why don't you just stay at home for as long as possible. So you can use your bath and have your DH and other home comforts. Then go in when contentions are sufficiently close that they won't epidural. As for staying etc its your baby and you surely can just leave. I feel so sad for you, it's a horrible predicament. I'm not sure what I would do, but I suppose ultimately I couldn't leave my lo's for any extended amount if time either. Ohh... You poor thing!

I'm also dressing labour, mine have not been easy. I've had a fully back to back which was so ridiculously painful and my first was just very long! Hoping to have an easier time of it this time. I like to go natural, just a bit of gas and air if needed but after the back to back experience I'd be incredibly apprehensive to go through that pain free again. Labour hurts no doubt, but that was another level.

I also worry about the babies in labour, being quite an anxious person. I suppose for all the fears of c-section the safety of your baby is one thing you don't have to worry about.

This pregnancy is flying by, it's totally mad. I'm 26 weeks now. The only thing that makes it still feel far off is that its due at Christmas, and with summer just finishing Christmas feels quite a way off. Once the Christmas adverts start I think I'll get quite excited. :-) I can't wait to meet this little girl!

I'm still having strange gender dreams though... Last night I had a dream that I had twins and was was definitely a boy and the one that was meant to be a girl seemed to have a very small willy... Strangely this was also my second premature birth dream, which considering I always go two weeks over it a bit of an odd thing to be dreaming about!

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Originally Posted by Emily

It would be great to have the option of gas and air. In a lot if countries it is epidural or nothing. - i have 'needed' an episiotomy both times so was glad that it was available but would really like the option of something else other than stirrups and docs.

The hospital that i would have to give birth at here give an epidural as standard at 3cm(?!), only like DH to be there for the last push otherwise they send them off to the cafeteria, have crappy little delivery rooms with just a bed and stirrups (no room to walk around, no ball, no real space for DH etc), give oxytocin without your consent, don't like labour to go on too long (tend to whip ladies into surgery for C sections as it is more profitable), ignore requests for the baby not to be scrubbed with antiseptic to make them clean, do not like you to have your baby in the room with you at night and try to sneak a bottle or two in even if you have said breastfeeding only.

There are so many things that they do as standard that I don't want. The midwife said all of that could be done the way that I want but there is no guarantee that they will stick to it on the day. I am so scared they will ignore me and my wishes and switch from English to French or vietnamese so that DH will not understand. We have thought about having the birth plan translated but in the thick of it will tehy stop and read it or just do what they have always done? I have almost decided to go back to the UK except it will break my heart to leave DS1 for so long.

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Emily - any chance you could deliver in Singapore? You could head over at 36 weeks with your son and maybe hubby can fly in for the weekends?

Singapore has an amazing reputation for its high westernised medical standards.

I have a gf who lives in Jakarta, Indonesia... Singapore was one of her options, instead she flew to Perth, Australia. She was induced a week early so her hubby could be there.

Thinking of you!

Emily - Ugh. I am so sorry that you are in this situation! I like the suggestions others are making...stay at home as long as possible, or maybe another closer country?

My labors are long. Yuck. DS1 was 28 hrs, DS2 12 hrs., and DS3 22 hrs...from very first contraction to delivery. Needed oxytocin with DS1 & 2, but not with DS3. Once active labor started, it went pretty fast...like 2.5 hrs. or something. LOVE the hospital I deliver at...it is amazing. It's called SkyRidge hospital and is locally known as SpaRidge. LOL. I feel very blessed to have had such a great experience each time!

AFM - 16-week checkup today...all is well. :) Still only feeling occasional flutters...darn anterior placenta! :( Emotionally doing ok...still have my moments, but feeling better for the most part. Doc said today I am blessed to have 4 boys...I know she's right!

Hi ladies - crickets around here :) I hope you're all doing well. I need your help! What do 2nd time mama's need? I am starting to prepare and am just really struggling because most of our 'big items' are gender neutral (car seats, strollers, pack n play, swing, bouncer, bumbo, crib, rocker, changing table, etc). Here is what I know we should get:
new bottle parts, new pacifiers (even though dd never used them), diapers, wipes, crib mattress (dd keeping hers for her toddler bed), double stroller, diaper changing pad cover, breast pump accessories and milk storage bags...anything else? What am I forgetting? Waiting on clothes since baby's gender is a 'surprise' :) Thanks for all of your help!