Due in Mar/April/May 2015

Hey ladies. I havent been around much lately. My father passed unexpectedly 3 weeks ago and im still trying to wrap my head around it. I feel bad because ive been feeling a bit disconnected 2 the pregnancy since. I hope the rest of u ladies r doing well.

I saw mum that u lost ur baby girl. I am so so sorry and heartbreaking. It seems so unfair.

Sory ladies i dont want to bring the forum down. I just wanted 2 pop in and update.
I hope every1 else is enjoying their pregnancies and its smooth sailing 4 every1 from now on.

Kitkat congrats on the baby girl. I had no doubt about it :)

I am SO sorry blessed :( Prayers and hugs your way

Oh man :((( I'm so sorry to read that blessed. May he RIP

Please take care everyone. Clearly not a good time right now :(

Blessed I'm so sorry, that is hard going. Don't beat yourself up you will connect with her again you just lost someone very very special in your life and you will need time to grieve. Thinking of you and please come back and let us know how you are getting on X

Blessed I'm so sorry for your loss. So hard to lose someone you care about while growing a new life. Confronting & confusing. Take care.

Sorry to hear about your loss blessed. It's very hard to lose a parent. You are I. My thoughts and prayers.


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Sweet mummy how are you doing? When do you get results from your test? Pray all is well.


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Blessed I'm so sorry to hear about your dad! Praying for you and your family through this difficult time xx

Sunflower I got my results back this afternoon - baby is normal and healthy :) I feel so blessed but so guilty...wishing all the mamas on here going through hard times lots of hugs and prayers xx

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Originally Posted by Sweet mummy

Blessed I'm so sorry to hear about your dad! Praying for you and your family through this difficult time x

Sunflower I got my results back this afternoon - baby is normal and healthy :) I feel so blessed but so guilty...wishing all the mamas on here going through hard times lots of hugs and prayers xx

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Congrats on your results sweet mummy!!!!Did you also find gender??

Great news sweet mummy xxx

Great news sweet mummy!!

Yay Sweet Mummy! Awesome news!

So so sorry for your loss Blessed. Life seems so unfair at times. Take care of yourself. (((HUGS)))

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Originally Posted by Sweet mummy

Thanks Mrs Incredible! Have you had your baby girl yet? Sorry if I missed the big announcement :) xx

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hi hon, yes Eva arrived safe and well 5 weeks ago today, thanks for asking. She was 6lb 7.5 at 38 weeks. I didn't do an announcement, just updated my due date group (which only has a few ladies!) should do an announcement. After the section it was a lot rougher recovery than the 3 normal deliveries with the boys, but the actual section wasn't as horrific as i imagined. We still have moments every day where we still can't believe we have a baby girl. She is perfect and so like my youngest son as a baby. We are all totally in love with her, my eldest loves to sit and hold her. It still feels like a dream xx

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Originally Posted by Sweet mummy

Blessed I'm so sorry to hear about your dad! Praying for you and your family through this difficult time xx

Sunflower I got my results back this afternoon - baby is normal and healthy :) I feel so blessed but so guilty...wishing all the mamas on here going through hard times lots of hugs and prayers xx

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fantastic news!! What a relief :)

Blessed, so sorry about your dad, hugs xx

I'm struggling along & feeling terribly guilty for it with all the baby losses, threat of foetal abnormalities and now the loss of Blessed's Dad. Logically gender is such a minute, inconsequential, selfish thing to worry about. And yet, I'm still nubsessing and looking at my photos over & over. I'm fearing the tech was wrong about the baby's nub. I feel like I keep seeing little things popping out under the nub in other people's nub shots, and that is what that thing is in mine. Someone posted a 13 weeks nub shot this morning in the ultrasound forums & it looks very girlie, and right under the nub is a lump that looks exactly like the bit the sonographer told me was my baby's nub. I haven't shared any of our thoughts about gender with our boys but for some reason both of them are convinced they are having a sister, they keep calling the baby "she" & "her" and are absolutely adamant it's a girl. I feel like it will break everyone's heart if it isn't. I keep staring at the potty shot too, & comparing it to girl & boy potty shots of the same gestation & I can't decide if my baby's protrudes a bit more or a bit less. The thing I'm really hating is that I feel within myself that this baby is a girl. I know that is caused by a combination of hope & of the girl guesses I've received. It is in no way Mother's Intuition but I feel like I'm bonding with a little girl, which I find terrifying because if the baby ISN'T a little girl then I feel like I won't feel bonded to the baby. I can't sleep properly or concentrate at work & I absolutely cannot afford to pay for a scan. I'm so sorry again to everyone who has experienced a loss & I understand if you all hate me for being so selfish.

No one thinks you are selfish primal mamma, its what brought us here the desire for one gender over another so I am sure everyone is completely understanding. I'm not sure there is anything I can say to make you feel better. All I can say is how hard those weeks for me leading up to the scan, it was hard to control my crazy!
I too googled and nub obsessed during work hours and had countless dreams about nubs yes weird!!!! I think all you can do is try and distract yourself, picture both outcomes and take a lot of deep breaths. Hoping the next few weeks fly by for you sending virtual hugs XX

Primal please don't feel selfish about your feelings! I am so glad you are speaking up about how torn your feelings are because society expects us to conform to and just be "happy with what we have" but even I wrestle with the fact daily about this baby's gender and I didn't even get a scan picture with a nub to obsess over. I can just imagine how it must be driving you crazy!

Anytime I feel worried or start stressing I look at my DS2 - he literally melts my heart and I immediately know if this is another boy I will love him just as much! I declared I will never feel gender disappointment again because this little boy will never know his mummy wanted a girl (if God decides this baby is a boy).

Sadly we did not find out gender with the CVS as they charge £190 for that privelege so we will wait patiently for our 20 week scan. I feel so calm now...is that weird? Kind of a "living in ignorance" sort of thing. Possibly because almost NO one knows about this pregnancy? We are telling the in-laws this weekend as we won't see them again until next year because we are going to my parents for Christmas and New Years. We will tell my parents when we see them too. Maybe it is because no one knows and I haven't had to deal with the "Oh it is probably another boy!" comments that it all seems surreal? I'm sure the reality will set in once the bump gets bigger and the comments start flying...then the depression might hit sigh!

Sweet mummy so glad everything turned out ok!

Blessed:( I am so sorry about your father. I lost my dad 3 years ago to cancer. It was just awful seeing him fade away. I was pg with ds3 which I named after him. Please try your best to take care. Hold tight to your memories of him:)

Primal I feel so bad that you are giving yourself such a hard time. If I had the extra money I would send it right your way to get your early scan!

Just wanted to stop by and check on everyone. Hope you all are doing well:)

I ended up ringing about a scan yesterday but I was right there is nowhere that does them here without a medical reason & the closest place that does is Brisbane which is 1300km south (16 hours drive). That kind of helps in a funny way as I know there isn't anything I could do even if I did have the money. I'll just have to wait. Scan is Xmas eve.

This is the photo comparing my baby & the "questionable nub" against the very girlie baby with the lump under the girlie nub that looks like what my sonographer said was the nub. Does that even make sense? Lol. But you see what I mean, those things are identical, whereas the girl baby has a long flat nub on top & mine has that "boy nub" that the sono swore black & blue wasn't the nub at all. The only thing to keep in mind is my baby was 13+6 so if the baby is a girl the nub would have started to retract back more than the other baby which was 13 weeks exactly. And the "boy nub" is sticking straight up at 90 degrees which is not really natural I guess. Still. I am worried.Attachment 22457

But your little one isn't as curled;) so maybe that's why the angles look different.

Maybe QueenB which is what I've been thinking this morning. Oh it's all horrid. I have 18 days to go.... Unless I have a sudden windfall which would mean I could pay for it to be done a week earlier. The free place won't do it til 20 weeks, the paying place will do it at 19 but charge $230 with no rebate. :( and I guess QueenB if that scenario is correct, then maybe that bit is the nub and the part I've circled in THIS photo is the protrusion underneath??? GAH I don't even know.Attachment 22460

Sorry not sure why the photo has uploaded twice!!

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Originally Posted by Mrs_Incredible

hi hon, yes Eva arrived safe and well 5 weeks ago today, thanks for asking. She was 6lb 7.5 at 38 weeks. I didn't do an announcement, just updated my due date group (which only has a few ladies!) should do an announcement. After the section it was a lot rougher recovery than the 3 normal deliveries with the boys, but the actual section wasn't as horrific as i imagined. We still have moments every day where we still can't believe we have a baby girl. She is perfect and so like my youngest son as a baby. We are all totally in love with her, my eldest loves to sit and hold her. It still feels like a dream xx

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Congratulations Mrs Incredible!!! You and your family must be over the moon to welcome a sweet baby girl into it safely!! I'm so happy for you all... it may take a couple months (even years!?) to sink in! Enjoy every minute of her precious being and please do make an announcement - we all need to celebrate any baby being born!! She was a tiny one wasn't she? Bless her giving mummy a hard time ;) but worth every minute I can imagine. Really happy for you xxx

Primal that sticking up bit definitely can't be nub! Must be leg that got cut off in the picture if baby was moving?

Whoops uploaded my pic to show a sticking up bit too that also looks like leg cut off!

Congratulations Mrs Incredible! I've been so busy obsessing about my own situation I completely missed yours! I spent a large chunk of yesterday pouring over confirmed girl photos and confirmed boy ones too & came to the only logical conclusion: my baby is a hermaphrodite. Lol. But seriously I found as many boy photos that looked the same as girl ones. One boy one in particular had a "nub" virtually identical to the sticking up thing that the sono said isn't a nub. So I think I just need to accept that the NT scan told me nothing & it is still 50/50. The funny thing is when I think it's a boy I'm nowhere near as distressed as when I start thinking it's a girl & then worry that maybe it isn't... I don't know why the whole thing is upsetting me so much anyway. I didn't really sway because it didn't seem all that important before I conceived. If I had known how desperately I really wanted a girl I would have tried harder.

Hi ladies. I am sorry I've been away for so long. I am so saddened to come back to so many ladies suffering loss and heartache. I can't imagine what you are going through with the loss of your baby girl twin or the loss of your father. So heartbreaking. I will pray for strength and healing for both of you. My thoughts are with your families.

At our house, we have not recieved any "bad" news. In fact, all the definitive news we have gotten has been good (previa is moving up at a very rapid and hopeful rate, the spinal column on baby looks perfect and no spina bifida concerns remain), but we still have some questions concerning baby's heart. According to the tech, baby has not been cooperative at either scan for the proper views she needs on a couple ventricles. She said it was rare to not get a decent view out of two scans, but doesn't necessarily mean baby has an abnormality with the areas. She just can't rule it out either. So, we wait longer. I have another scan booked in about two weeks (it was 4, but I've been gone for a couple of those weeks). Additionally, we are having some concerns about my blood pressure/protein in my urine. I had to do a 24-hour collection and monitor my blood pressure for the same duration. I'll get the results of that on Tuesday (I have an appt with the nkh risk doc at the practice). I've never had a hint of a blood pressure issue in my life (I normally run very low, actually) and I've never had problems in pregnancy with either protein in my urine or blood pressure. The midwife said it's pretty uncommon to not have pre-eclampsia for three pregnancies and then suddenly develop it in a fourth. But I guess "uncommon" is par for the course these days. I must admit, I have some symptoms of having high blood pressure and this pregnancy has taken a lot out of me that I didn't expect. My previous three were much easier.

BUT, the good news is that all traces of any potential gender desire or disappointment are gone. In fact, I'll be thrilled beyond measure to have a little boy. Or a girl. I feel like a lot changed for me during this whole experience and it has left me with a peace about whatever we get. But, I'm aware that my situation is rather different from many on here and I don't pretend to be in the same place, nor do I judge those who are struggling. I know what that's like and just feel lucky to not be there right now.

I hope to be around more. I hope everyone is feeling well as we head toward the halfway point or the third trimester! Soon enough we will have tons of beautiful baby pics filling these pages. :)

Hotdogz I'm thinking of you, so hard when there is anything odd hanging over a pregnancy but I'm glad that so far all the definites are positive. Pregnancy is such a peaceful place when all is well & if GD is not an issue. I long for my early pregnancy before the NT scan when I assumed my baby is a boy & I was relaxed & happy. I went shopping today, didn't buy anything for the baby but I looked at lots of gender neutral newborn things. They looked so tiny & & sweey & I can't believe my boys ever fitted into size 0000 but of course they both did (DS2 only for a week or so). Every time I settle my mind that the baby is a boy I am fine. It's when I think it MIGHT be a girl that I start to panic. Only because I am terrified of Gender Disappointment. This baby was never conceived with a "job", I had only mild GD prior to the NT scan & it was always about having another child & not "trying for a girl". I have a cousin who is the 3rd of 3 boys & everyone in the family is always reminded that he was "supposed to be a girl." He is 40 years old, with his own child now & his mother is STILL bitter that he was "supposed to be a girl." He has carried being that disappointment his whole life & it's awful. He was an overachiever in his youth & none of it was ever good enough. I'm terrified of being that parent & it's one of the reasons I haven't told any of my family about my GD & insisted that I don't mind what gender the baby is. I don't want my baby ever thinking he was meant to be something other than what he is. Sigh. 17 days til my scan. I can do this.

Hotdogz I have been thinking of you! Pleased the last scan went well, sorry that you still have a few unanswered questions, it will be such a relief to have that final scan checking the heart. Keep us posted on the results from Tuesday xx
Hoping those 17days fly by for you primal! It really is a sucky place to be in limbo.
Hope everyone else is well, can't believe some of us are nearing third trimester!! Xxx

PrimalMamma have u tried the ring test?
I so believe in it , try it just for fun !

And the rest try it and let us know !

LOL business woman! I've done the ring test so many times & every time I look up the ring test online I find some websites that say circles mean girls & others that say swinging means girls & vice versa for boys. For me the ring starts in a swing but then settles into circles... so backs up my "hermaphrodite" theory haha. The baking soda test said girl, Ramzi was girl (I had a scan at 6 weeks). Craving-wise early on I had "girl" cravings but now I have "boy" cravings. I don't put a lot (any!) faith in old wives tales or symptom-based theories.

So even the ring test is confusing !
I believe circles for girl and swinging for boys
I did it on my hand and it says girl then boy
I had a girl already and this baby is supposed to be a boy :)
I will wait untill Im 12 weeks to do it on my belly :)

Thanks for the support ladies :) It's really nice to be a place of acceptance. My mom and I have found some great neutral clothes lately, which makes me really excited for him/her to get to wear them. I keep thinking of what it will be like having a newborn and realize that its really happening. Lol. I am 26w today and my others were all born before 38 weeks. So....I have about 12 weeks or so left. Which seems sooooo short!! When I think that it's likely ill have a late-Feb baby...that is like two months away. I guess time is moving right along.

I am a little sad that DH is really sticking with this being the last. And I just don't feel that right now. I can't imagine this being it. But I'll think about that another time. Hopefully i can convince him we make really pretty babies and need more of them ;)

Only another two weeks or so for you Primal. You can totally do it. Honestly, for me, with my babies, that wait to get to the scan is the worst. I can handle the "disappointment" afterward, but I hated waiting for the scan. With both of them I just wanted to start bonding, either way it went (and, of course, you are aware that one of those times was a time I had GD and one I got my DG). This time was nice because that pressure was not there. Although I AM getting outside pressure for this baby. Which is irritating. I can be on cloud nine imagining either and then someone opens their big mouth about it!

Just a random question...are you guys buying anything for baby for Christmas? I got a cute little hooded towel and will wrap it up for him/her. It's a fox and it's orange and so soft. Obviously being the fourth, we don't need much, but I like to buy a few new things.

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Article in one of the local family magazines from our town! No name supplied but wow! :)

What a good article Sweet! And yeah I can relate. Every time I was seen out with my sons when DS2 was newborn someone invariably said "He's sweet... But I bet you would have loved a girl!" Astonishing. What is more astonishing is that you know that if I had said "Yes actually I wanted a girl & he was a real disappointment" the same idiot would have been horrified.

Exactly! Refreshing to read something like this that wasn't put there because of some backlash from somewhere else. Plain and simple the mum was happy with her two boys and somebody though that was humanly impossible! I think this is the root of why some people develop gender disappointment - almost a sense of not wanting to let others down (even complete strangers!) xxx

So I woke up with spotting this morning. Nothing major but went to the GP & she inmediately referred me for a scan. Everything is fine with baby... And he is a boy! I'm not upset at all, just relieved to finally know & that he is healthy. He is breech so has probably been kicking my cervix which could have caused the bleeding. My poor husband is devistated about the gender, but relieved he is healthy.

Congratulations primal!

Congratulations Primal! What a blessing!