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Originally Posted by Falling2Grace
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Welcome!Quote:
Originally Posted by Falling2Grace
Oh yay! Congratulations!Quote:
Originally Posted by WantingPink
I am sure P4P was offered that test along with her gender scan? Maybe she will chip in with some reassurance for you.... But really 99.4% - it's a girl surely!!!
XX
I guess it depends on the personalities of the families in question and everyone is offering advice based on their own personal experience of their individual situation. I have told my MIL exactly what I thought in the past and it made our situation much worse. Not only did the comments become worse when i saw her but now there is sadly an awkward atmosphere every time we meet. It completely upset my DH and caused him to be ill with stress as he has always been a non confrontational personality type so I try now just to be civil and ignore what I can as I don't think putting her in her place is worth massively upsetting him over as it doesn't maker her change so there is no net benefit. I'm glad it worked out for you though Violet and you experienced a positive outcome. That's why this forum is so great as you get to hear about everyone's different life experiences and they are all so varied!Quote:
Originally Posted by Violet_
Thanks Violet. I totally see where you are coming from, I'm glad your situation got better! Her and I both have very strong personalities so we just butt heads no matter what, I have thought about just talking to her but I'm afraid to cause tension. His parents do a lot for us so I'm just trying to ride it out a bit longer (which is very hard with my pregnancy hormones)!
That being said of course, I ignore her comments but I don't just sit and smile, I do still stand my ground on my decisions. Like last week when she was upset about the school I want to put him in, I just said "Well, that's the school I want him to go to and we have decided that's a good place for him. I don't mind driving him" Then when she continued to ramble on I just said "Oh well!" and DH changed the subject. I'm really hoping that at some point maybe she'll realize we are going to do things how we want to and she'll just stop being snarky!! But if it continues like this, I'm going to have to talk to her, cause as you said I'm not going to listen to unthoughtful things everyday. Although she is my MIL, she also needs to respect us.
Thanks for all the comments and advice ladies, I really appreciate it!! I feel much better talking about it, I talk to it with DH but try not to go to far because I don't want to upset him! I actually have to head over to my in-laws now to pick up DS1 as he had a sleepover with them so DH and I could go to the Toronto Maple Leafs game last night. I'm super tired so crossing my fingers she's in a good mood today lol.
PS: Holy I just realized there are only 98 days until my c-section! I'm into the double digit count down now!!!
so exciting!!!! :flowerz:Quote:
Originally Posted by cvd
how exciting cvd, 19 weeks feels like a lifetime til i meet this little person!
wanting i'm not sure how accurate your test was but i'm not trusting mine either til its confirmed at the scan. I had a cvs test done 99% ish accurate but there are a few moms they get it wrong for (like 1 at most in every 100 - which although low to me was a realistic odd). Maybe view it as a confirmation but hold off telling everyone til your scan just in case. I'm not taking anything for granted as sods law i'd be the one it was wrong for!
Anyone any ideas on how to share your news, particuarly with work (yes we've still not come out of the closet and with a big bump am sick of sitting in my coat - at least its winter and cold though!). My boss will hate the news but i so want to tell her in way that says i'm happy and don't care what she thinks (particuarly because i don't think legally she can say anything horrible although i know it won't be a nice reaction)
ps you team green girls are killing me here!!!!!!!
mrsp your 21 weeks prego and havent told your job and who else??? crazy girl:)
I am going to share news w/ fam and my friends/fb world this week after my mw appt. so that'll be fun:)
i know but with 3 kids already big families aren't really done round here and cause we have all the same gender we seem to stick out even more and i just couldn't be doing with all the horrible comments and wanted to be sure babe was ok before we announced it, i have told my parents and dh's parents but thats it.
i'm sure i legally have until 25 weeks to tell work anyway or at least i hope so
cvd, I know you have heaps of comments about MILs but I can't help but share my latest run in with mine. Usually we get on OK but only cause I try really hard, she does drive me crazy as she never listens to anything you say and just does want she wants even when you have said no. She is one of those people when you say I am tired she is worse off, or it was harder in her day etc. Anyway the other week my DHs grandmother passed away. His family live 8 hours from us, so we drove there and back over 2 days to go the funeral. I was really sick at the time and it was a big effort for me to go and sit in the car that long. Of course we would always go but still I thought a little thanks would be nice instead she had a go at me after the funeral saying I always snap at her and continously do it and she is sick of it. How it started was that at the funeral not one family member said to me congrats about being pregnant, I was noticably preganat and it kind of upset me. She later said to me we haven't told anyone your pregnant, I said OH you can tell people. She didn't listen and then said but your SIL let it out of the bag. I said that is fine it is not a secret. Even when my SIL did say something to one of the cousins and they congratulated me, when my MIL walked over they said, congrats your going to be a grandmother again. Her response was , AM I? I thought what do you mean, are you? Anyway when I said to her again it is not a secret, she snapped and said I am always short with her. I said but why are you not telling the family? She yelled at me then and said we are keeping your secret, at Christmas when you told us you were pregnant you said it was a secret. I was 7 weeks then, I am now 13 (or was then), my belly is sticking out, how is it still a secret. Plus it was all about my secret, what I had said. My DH didn't even come into the equation. Anyway she then slamed some doors and went to bed. Of course I had to go and apologise and say I was sorry. She said lets just start a fresh, I thought I don't think so. We had to go back last weekend for a planned visit and she didn't even mention the baby, did ask me how I was or even achkowlegde I was pregnant. I will not forget this for a long time after everything I do to make sure my DH remembers her birthday, mothers day ete. I get him to ring her once a week and much more. Well no more, I will be poilite but that is it.
Sorry for long post, feels good to get it off my chest actually as I haven't really told anyone what happened except my mum.