Due in January, February & March 2019

Your sway sounds really good Simkan I really hope this is your girl xx

I will find out around the 23rd of July hopefully through panorama.
I'm not holding out much hope for a girl we dtd on o day like several hours before! I would have loved a cut off ( although ds1 & ds2 were cut offs) but we were doing e4d to cut out stress with opks and thats where my 4th day landed! I'm upset but it can't be undone. I did le diet, exercise and clomid so hoping that I have a chance with those but it's too painful to get my hopes up- I did last time with my sway opposite and it nearly broke me! This is really my last chance because dh really has said more more than 3 so it's really a nervous wait. I just hope I can accept the outcome with grace and hold it together for my family because I don't want to fall apart or be bitter. I just want to be grateful for what I I have and live my life. Anyway sorry for the novel haha I'm getting a bit dark at the moment. Gender anxiety really messes with your emotions!

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Originally Posted by kittendreams

Your sway sounds really good Simkan I really hope this is your girl xx

I will find out around the 23rd of July hopefully through panorama.
I'm not holding out much hope for a girl we dtd on o day like several hours before! I would have loved a cut off ( although ds1 & ds2 were cut offs) but we were doing e4d to cut out stress with opks and thats where my 4th day landed! I'm upset but it can't be undone. I did le diet, exercise and clomid so hoping that I have a chance with those but it's too painful to get my hopes up- I did last time with my sway opposite and it nearly broke me! This is really my last chance because dh really has said more more than 3 so it's really a nervous wait. I just hope I can accept the outcome with grace and hold it together for my family because I don't want to fall apart or be bitter. I just want to be grateful for what I I have and live my life. Anyway sorry for the novel haha I'm getting a bit dark at the moment. Gender anxiety really messes with your emotions!

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That is exactly how I feel!
Don't worry about the day, they say that the timing doesn't actually matter and so many people have girls on O day. I'm also really worried about holding it together, it's really hard when you have a family and can't take the time to have a breakdown.
And also of course that "you're not allowed " to be sad over gender.
I just found out tonight that one of my friends found out she's pregnant like 2 days before I did so we'll be due the same time. And I'm so scared she will get a girl and I won't. I mean it's a miracle she's pregnant. She was told she couldn't have kids years ago and then lost a baby at 13 weeks and then had a miracle little boy. So this would be most likely her last chance for a girl too and I'd be so happy for her. If I knew I was having one too! I hate thinking this way. I can't allow myself to be this invested in the outcome.
And I should be so happy to be pregnant and praying for it to be healthy because my pregnancy with my second was awful. We were basically told that he wasn't going to make it and I spent the entire pregnancy until he was born waiting for the baby to die inside me. Thankfully everything turned out ok, but I know what it's like to have "real" problems in pregnancy so I feel really stupid worrying over not having a girl.
but I know you ladies understand x

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Originally Posted by hannahptrussell

TP, with 2 of mine, I had cramping through the first 2 trimesters. That turned into significant ligament and sciatica pain. I think it all is related. I’m with you though in still freaking out over nothing. I wore a sea band bracelet today and questioned why I wasn’t feeling as nauseous as yesterday. I thought I was losing symptoms. I actually think the dang band is working! Haha. It is so easy to obsess over little things.
Oh ABC, I am with you on all the OWT signs. I am trying to let go. It’s just so hard. I had a dream that we had another boy and I woke up crying!! I told my husband that maybe I need to find out what we are having. So I can deal with it and get on with life! But what do y’all think? Easier on the emotions if I wait until that sweet baby is in my arms? Or does it just add to wishful thinking that it MAY be our girl?


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Thank you and ABC for asking! I think you're right -- it definitely let up, and honestly I had REALLY bad RLP with DD early. I think I might have SPD that never got diagnosed with her (my hips ached and hurt for an entire year after having her, as well -- though I did have three pregnancies thrown into that year, too!). So I'm wondering if that's what is happening now, especially since I guess this is the week the uterus starts rising from the uterus? Symptoms are definitely tapering (and I'm weaning off prednisone and have noticed no difference, so maybe that's coincidental timing or maybe it really wasn't doing anything? People in my immune communities said that the dose I'm on is super low, haha).

As for your decision -- I think this is so hard. I was always such an advocate for finding out early. I think though that it depends. In my case, I'm wanting to go so green that I even rescheduled my nuchal for earlier so I don't know. I legit don't trust myself to not be as depressed and legitimately suicidal as I was with DD, and I need to have a sibling for DD no matter what at this point -- I'm definitely doing this for her now, because if it was a girl, I think I'd really struggle with keeping it. But with DD, I know I told people they should find out because a.) I REALLY wanted a boy (still do!) and b.) people THOUGHT I was having a boy the whole time between OWT/how I looked/I guess how I am? As immediate as my love was with DD, and as hard as that pregnancy was with GD, I think I definitely would have been thinking it'd be a boy based on people's comments (though DH and I thought she was a girl from BFP!).

If you're like me, and are going to keep the baby no matter what (which I think most people are and do on here), I can see the benefit in not finding out until birth. If you would rather work through all GD issues beforehand, there's also a benefit to finding out, too!

I wish there was an easier answer!!

And aside: I started feeling like this pregnancy was a girl because of a dream I had early on! BUT, I also just had an AWFUL nightmare last night where I was pregnant with a boy... but lost him at 25 weeks?! Oh my god, it was such an awful dream! Dreams are clearly just our anxieties somehow! haha

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Originally Posted by simkan

That is exactly how I feel!
Don't worry about the day, they say that the timing doesn't actually matter and so many people have girls on O day. I'm also really worried about holding it together, it's really hard when you have a family and can't take the time to have a breakdown.
And also of course that "you're not allowed " to be sad over gender.
I just found out tonight that one of my friends found out she's pregnant like 2 days before I did so we'll be due the same time. And I'm so scared she will get a girl and I won't. I mean it's a miracle she's pregnant. She was told she couldn't have kids years ago and then lost a baby at 13 weeks and then had a miracle little boy. So this would be most likely her last chance for a girl too and I'd be so happy for her. If I knew I was having one too! I hate thinking this way. I can't allow myself to be this invested in the outcome.
And I should be so happy to be pregnant and praying for it to be healthy because my pregnancy with my second was awful. We were basically told that he wasn't going to make it and I spent the entire pregnancy until he was born waiting for the baby to die inside me. Thankfully everything turned out ok, but I know what it's like to have "real" problems in pregnancy so I feel really stupid worrying over not having a girl.
but I know you ladies understand x

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I totally understand. I think we all do -- I hope we all know this is a safe place to voice these thoughts! I don't think any less of any of you -- I GET it! I'm jealous of the people who always go, "I"ll be happy no matter what." I've had 8 losses -- TEN total babies -- and still I want this to be a boy more than anything and dread the opposite!

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Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther

I totally understand. I think we all do -- I hope we all know this is a safe place to voice these thoughts! I don't think any less of any of you -- I GET it! I'm jealous of the people who always go, "I"ll be happy no matter what." I've had 8 losses -- TEN total babies -- and still I want this to be a boy more than anything and dread the opposite!

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I'm pretty sure that the only people that say that already have the gender they were hoping for or they're not being honest because it is the right thing to say.
I don't know maybe some people really don't mind. I didn't think I'd be this obsessed. But I also assumed I'd have both.

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Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther

Thank you and ABC for asking! I think you're right -- it definitely let up, and honestly I had REALLY bad RLP with DD early. I think I might have SPD that never got diagnosed with her (my hips ached and hurt for an entire year after having her, as well -- though I did have three pregnancies thrown into that year, too!). So I'm wondering if that's what is happening now, especially since I guess this is the week the uterus starts rising from the uterus? Symptoms are definitely tapering (and I'm weaning off prednisone and have noticed no difference, so maybe that's coincidental timing or maybe it really wasn't doing anything? People in my immune communities said that the dose I'm on is super low, haha).

As for your decision -- I think this is so hard. I was always such an advocate for finding out early. I think though that it depends. In my case, I'm wanting to go so green that I even rescheduled my nuchal for earlier so I don't know. I legit don't trust myself to not be as depressed and legitimately suicidal as I was with DD, and I need to have a sibling for DD no matter what at this point -- I'm definitely doing this for her now, because if it was a girl, I think I'd really struggle with keeping it. But with DD, I know I told people they should find out because a.) I REALLY wanted a boy (still do!) and b.) people THOUGHT I was having a boy the whole time between OWT/how I looked/I guess how I am? As immediate as my love was with DD, and as hard as that pregnancy was with GD, I think I definitely would have been thinking it'd be a boy based on people's comments (though DH and I thought she was a girl from BFP!).

If you're like me, and are going to keep the baby no matter what (which I think most people are and do on here), I can see the benefit in not finding out until birth. If you would rather work through all GD issues beforehand, there's also a benefit to finding out, too!

I wish there was an easier answer!!

And aside: I started feeling like this pregnancy was a girl because of a dream I had early on! BUT, I also just had an AWFUL nightmare last night where I was pregnant with a boy... but lost him at 25 weeks?! Oh my god, it was such an awful dream! Dreams are clearly just our anxieties somehow! haha

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What an awful dream TP they are so real in pregnancy and I agree often just reflect our worries xx

Welcome Simkan and congrats!!!! I don't have much to add to what others have already said about the gender stuff but just to second TP's comment that this is definitely a safe space to vent all those feelings - and as you can tell most of us on here are dealing with the same feelings! It's really hard to want something so much and not be sure if you'll ever have it.

TP glad the cramping has stopped! I've had one or two dreams already that I miscarried - it really is just our anxieties being reflected in dreams I think!

I threw up for the first time this morning. It was first thing in the morning so it was just stomach acid, plus dry heaving for like 5 minutes. So lovely. Been mostly ok the rest of the day though. I did that with my boys (threw up every morning right after getting out of bed) so I'm wondering if that will start up again. And man this fatigue is killing me - did not feel anywhere near this tired the first two times!! Getting really anxious about Friday though as it's the "supposed to see the heartbeats" scan and last time I had that scan (in February) things did not go well (measured 11 days behind, no HB, m/c confirmed a week later). I feel like that baby may have stopped developing around the 5-5.5 week mark so since my scan last Friday was at 5.5 weeks I'm worrying about whether it happened again. Praying it will be different this time!

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Originally Posted by ABC.2606

Welcome Simkan and congrats!!!! I don't have much to add to what others have already said about the gender stuff but just to second TP's comment that this is definitely a safe space to vent all those feelings - and as you can tell most of us on here are dealing with the same feelings! It's really hard to want something so much and not be sure if you'll ever have it.

TP glad the cramping has stopped! I've had one or two dreams already that I miscarried - it really is just our anxieties being reflected in dreams I think!

I threw up for the first time this morning. It was first thing in the morning so it was just stomach acid, plus dry heaving for like 5 minutes. So lovely. Been mostly ok the rest of the day though. I did that with my boys (threw up every morning right after getting out of bed) so I'm wondering if that will start up again. And man this fatigue is killing me - did not feel anywhere near this tired the first two times!! Getting really anxious about Friday though as it's the "supposed to see the heartbeats" scan and last time I had that scan (in February) things did not go well (measured 11 days behind, no HB, m/c confirmed a week later). I feel like that baby may have stopped developing around the 5-5.5 week mark so since my scan last Friday was at 5.5 weeks I'm worrying about whether it happened again. Praying it will be different this time!

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Oh ABC you poor thing I can't even imagine the fear. Thinking of you and i know you are strong and can handle this. These are your rainbow babies I just know it xxx
oh and sorry about the vomit! Not a good feeling at all. I'm yet to get it but have my maxalon script ready for when I do!

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Originally Posted by kittendreams

Oh ABC you poor thing I can't even imagine the fear. Thinking of you and i know you are strong and can handle this. These are your rainbow babies I just know it xxx
oh and sorry about the vomit! Not a good feeling at all. I'm yet to get it but have my maxalon script ready for when I do!

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Thanks Kitten!! Yea I hope all will be ok. The vomit/nausea/food aversions are NO fun but then during the times of the day that I feel better I start worrying more, so I guess it's better when I feel miserable (if that makes sense)!!

ABC, I completely feel you on the exhaustion. It is overwhelming. I almost fell asleep today in my car during a break from meetings. It was so tempting.
I’ve had a few throw up spells. I hate them. Every morning, I have to give myself a pep talk that I will not throw up! Haha! It’s funny and awful at the same time. And my gag reflex this round is out of control. But I guess I’d rather that than lose my cookies all day long.
The sea band is definitely working for me. I can tell such a difference during the day. I took it off when I got home and within 10 minutes was feeling extremely nauseated. I’m just glad I haven’t had to do zofran yet. I can still taste that crap from my last pregnancy (HG with a boy btw) That OWT about sickness being worse with girls is dumb.


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