Not finding out the gender?

my first pregnancy, I didn't have GD but I did have a preference for pink, we stayed team yellow. I felt we were having a girl, though.

when he was born I didn't really care when my baby was placed in my arms! It didn't cross my mind to even check what we had - I was just glad the labour and pregnancy were over and that there was my baby. It was my husband who looked and got choked up saying "we have a son"! <3

I think next time I'll feel much the same. I'll convince myself it's a boy during pregnancy by looking for ANY aspect of my sway that went "wrong", and even now I'm only letting myself picture life with 3 boys and have already named our next boy to make him more real. Already I can't think I'll be lucky enough to get a girl. If it's a girl it'll be a nice surprise that way but I'll already be mentally prepared for a boy.

Of course it's possible not to know its your baby your choice - just tell them u want the baby handed straight to u and no announcement if sex and u find out in your own time. Perfectly acceptable request

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Originally Posted by Mum23boys

Of course it's possible not to know its your baby your choice - just tell them u want the baby handed straight to u and no announcement if sex and u find out in your own time. Perfectly acceptable request

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I'm so scared someone would forget or extra staff not know my rules and 'ruin' my plan. I might have to stick up a big sign on the wall saying 'do not announce the gender' lol ;)

I'm a midwife and have NEVER announced babies gender at the birth unless the mother specifically asked me when baby was born. I always say something along the lines of "did you see what you've got" or "have a look" etc. To be honest i've only seen it happen a few times where the dr. or midwife announced the gender and not waited for the parents to check. If that's what you want just make sure you let them know before hand though so no one spoils the surprise for you.

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Originally Posted by 1+2+3boys

I'm so scared someone would forget or extra staff not know my rules and 'ruin' my plan. I might have to stick up a big sign on the wall saying 'do not announce the gender' lol ;)

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write it in big red letters on your birth plan :P

I will have to find out the gender, in case I have to deal with any disappointment before the baby is born. Plus I am horribly impatient and could never wait :P

I had my 20w scan yesterday. We didn't find out. I didn't find out for our 2 boys and the delivery room reveals were magical. I definitely had a pang of GD when DS2 was born... They took him to the other side of the room to clean him up and I lay there thinking "I'm not going to ever have a girl". It had nothing to do with my beautiful, perfect son it was very separate. I'm scared if I find out before baby is here my GD will be directed at the baby and the pregnancy. Once you have the baby on your arms nothing else matters.

I tell you what - if one more person says anything about how this baby "has" to be a girl, or how "funny" it would be if I had 3 boys I'm going to lose my sh!t!!!! My response has been "So you won't love this baby if it's a boy?". If anyone has any better comebacks, please let me know... I have steam coming out of my ears!!

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Originally Posted by Am3a

I had my 20w scan yesterday. We didn't find out. I didn't find out for our 2 boys and the delivery room reveals were magical. I definitely had a pang of GD when DS2 was born... They took him to the other side of the room to clean him up and I lay there thinking "I'm not going to ever have a girl". It had nothing to do with my beautiful, perfect son it was very separate. I'm scared if I find out before baby is here my GD will be directed at the baby and the pregnancy. Once you have the baby on your arms nothing else matters.

I tell you what - if one more person says anything about how this baby "has" to be a girl, or how "funny" it would be if I had 3 boys I'm going to lose my sh!t!!!! My response has been "So you won't love this baby if it's a boy?". If anyone has any better comebacks, please let me know... I have steam coming out of my ears!!

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Am3a - My favourite comment is the "you guys haaaaave to have a girl, they are so amazing you would seriously LOVE a daughter" because apparently we're able to just choose what we want!?!? I hear yah and I really have no good comebacks. We also haven't found out and one of the main reasons is to just not have to hear the stupid "oh, well looks like you need to try for #4 to get a girl!"

For me being my last pregnancy I really want to enjoy it as much as possible because I love being pregnant and even look forward to the labour and birth. When I found out my twins were boys number 2 and 3 at 16 weeks I lost all excitement over the pregnancy for at least a week and it slowly returned over the next couple of weeks which was a horrible feeling. I just do not want that again. Also I want the birth to go as smoothly as possible because it will be a VBAC because of breech and transverse babies and I have heard the saying you push better when you do not know the gender. That is just me though, all passionate about all that kind of stuff! I may feel completely different once pregnant and will probably not be able to help finding out due to impatience. I just want to know what it is like to have a surprise baby and I hope that once I see my baby and fall in love, those feelings will ride over GD if it's a boy.

We only found out with the last 2:) The 1st of these pregnancies We felt almost awkward talking about the baby as if despite him being our dg something excitement? was missing. This 2nd time has been easier as I find my head is more focused on the family and not gender obsessing and theres no awkwardness this time:)

The rest of the times have been delivery room:) and on occasions when it has not been my dg I have held lo and just had a quiet whisper to them saying 'well you may not have been the exact one I was hoping for but your perfect and your mine and just wait til you meet your family!':bigsmile: and just let the dissappointment go there:)