Need advice on when to announce...& minimize STUPID gender comments

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by begonia

You don't feel like it's OK to be honest here? Or am I misunderstanding?

---

Someone had mentioned in a prior comment that she didn't understand why people on this website don't view honesty as a solution to the problem. So, in response to that comment, I mentioned that honesty IRL isn't acceptable as a real solution to getting the gender comments to stop...because IRL no one admits or acknowledges gender desire.

So, yes, in some situations honesty seems to work...depending on the audience. However, I don't like it as a blanket solution to stopping gender comments...because it doesn't seem, realistic. Also, just my opinion!

Thanks, Begonia. I REALLY hope that I can come back on here in a week & say "FINALLY!! A GIRL!!!!!" Realistically, I've been down this road before. Statistically, it's another boy. Nothing changed much in my sway. I want it to be a girl...but somehow feel like things are too slanted AGAINST me & like it will never happen.

Trying not to think about it.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by begonia

The worst though is when someone is like, "oh I know, I reeeeeally wanted a boy but thank goodness I got him!" OUCH, LOL! I mean, thanks for the empathy ... I guess?!?

---

Why are some people so...mean? I mean, really, would you walk up to someone and say, "We reeeeeeally wanted to go to Hawaii instead of camping, I'm so glad we got to go on the trip of a lifetime!!" (If the other person just went camping.) Bad analogy? Maybe. My point: why do people feel like it's okay to point it out and rub it in that THEY too wanted a gender & that they're finally complete---when, on some level they have to know we feel the same way!

I hope you hear what you are wanting. I know how you feel with others asking. I went for the "don't find out" option, only to secretly go and find out so that no one would bug me in case it was ds4. In my case, I really didn't care either way when I was preg with ds3 but others' opinions really made me think I'm missing out not having a DD. I've posted on here before that I wanted to be a boy mom my whole life, and loved it. but when preg with ds3 every friend and stranger made a point to let me know how much I'm missing out. how boys leave their families when they grow up. How it's so nice to have a daughter to have something in common with...and it sucks to allow these comments ruin the pregnancy. It wasn't till DS3 that I began longing for a DD. I also think it's only natural when you have 2 or 3 + of the same gender most just naturally want the opposite. I agree with others' on here....Comments don't end though...now I get the "your poor dd will have a bunch of big brothers", "she's never gonna date", Or "she will need a sister" "are you gonna try for a sister?". We are done having kids. we wanted 4. if this was boy 4 we were still done. So now, I just laugh off the comments and even add a few myself to shut them up. Hope you Hear girl!!!!