Thanks everyone for your responses! It's so nice to hear other people's point of view on such an important deciscion! Cinss, it probably would be best to wait til they aren't quite so challenging. Newborns are so hard, DS2 had colic and was a preemie, any baby I have from now on will be taken at 35 weeks at the latest so I know another preemie would be very stressful again.
Maybe some day, I can talk to DH (probably get him drunk first lol) and ask him about having 2 more back to back a few years down the road.. Id love to secure a #4 but he's quite contented with his 2 sons, but he knows how desperately I want a DD and is willing to try 2x more for me. Yet he says all the time he only has one more in him.
I guess in my head and heart and I know that I shouldn't have a third right now, but my greed makes me want to try right NOW. I'm so tired of having to wait. I had everything planned out to sway before DS1 was even born but everything happens for a reason. Maybe I'll hold off for now, I just know it's not a good idea or I wouldn't be questioning it, I'm just being greedy. I just hope I don't end up pregnant before the attempt, that's another reason I want to have one planned try then another surprise cuz I just snack way too much to ever have a DD naturally lol. A few of you mentioned not rushing the sway planning and yeah, I have been like AH I don't even know what I'm going to do! And where we are has absolutely nothing on the list pretty much. We're moving at the end of the year anyway. I obsess over things so I haven't started my new plan yet, I have to be completely able to obsess away and with these 2 boys fighting and getting into everything I can't zone in.
Anyway thanks again everyone, it's so hard to wait for something you want so bad. Maybe we will move back to the states and have a chance to adpot a girl. Or maybe we will win the lottery and can go HT hahaha