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Very true. I'm lucky enough to have one son who's more interested in clothes and pretty things than sports and trucks. His favourite colour is pink and he loves to make and wear beaded jewellery. There's no saying whether a daughter would be interested in the same things as me anyway - maybe my ds will become my shopping buddy as he grows older :HH:.Quote:
Originally Posted by zanacal
I also spent my whole life assuming I'd have a daughter - whenever I pictured myself as a Mom it was with a freckle-faced girl who looked like me. If I'd ever stopped to think about it I probably would have realised it might be trickier than I thought to have a girl - I have 3 older brothers, and DH is also from a family of 3 boys and one girl.Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
[QUOTE=Mochagirl;81534]I think if you go on the site they have a map in the contacts section....and yeah, I put "baby ultrasound ontario" and there are a few but just in the 2 places you mentioned. Rockwood was the closest to you. I know...$100 dollars for something I could get for free. I feel bad for doing it...but my mind is worth $100!!! LOLQuote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
:HH: I think my oldest will become my potential shopper:) I hope to have at least one son that will like to really hang out with mom when they're older. Plus, I really hope that my DIL's are sweet and that we can be close too:)Quote:
Originally Posted by Mochagirl
[QUOTE=DoulaMama;81544]I think I might have found one in Cambridge, which is definitely close enough...but their website won't load so I'm not sure they offer gender scans.... I don't even know why I'm spending so much time on this anyway - I'm only 4 weeks pregnant! :bigsmile:Quote:
Originally Posted by Mochagirl
Mocha- Why don't you call and see... LOL!!! 519-620-2240
So why is it that you want a scan, Mocha? Will they not tell you at the u/s? Or does your DH want a surprise...and you are finding out without him knowing? Just nosey!
Lol, my DS2 is my girly boy. As soon as he stopped going to pre-school with DS1 (who is very anti-pink!) he started dressing up in dresses and fairy outfits and playing with dolls all the time! He's such a sweetie x
I'm so excited you're going to find out DM - when will you have the scan?
Having said yesterday that I have no pregnancy symptoms, I have been so HOT since last night (and I mean temperature wise!) and this evening I feel a little sick!
Oh, only because I've never had one of those 'fun' ultrasounds (though I had an ultrasound every week during my twin pregnancy) and because I could find out the gender a few weeks early. It's a loooong way away, though, and I'll probably just end up waiting until the regular 20 week u/s and hope they get a good shot. I just want to know what my options are.Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
Z, my middle guy just brought home tu-tu from our local kids shop and he loves it! LOL It's zebra print and all! I'm extremely open and dislike the whole "girls=pink" and "boys=football" roles. My kids can be whoever they're going to be:) It's nice to hear that other moms feel the same way:HH:Quote:
Originally Posted by zanacal
I think I'll be finding out at 17w! EEK! That's 6 weeks from Wed. OMG....I'm getting all nervous just thinking about it! LOL
Ah Gotcha! Did you find out easily with the twins..is it harder to get a gender shot with 2 crammed in there? LOLQuote:
Originally Posted by Mochagirl
Believe it or not, we didn't find out the gender with my twins. I wanted to, but DH wouldn't hear of it. It was REALLY hard not to find out with all the scans we had to have - we had to tell the tech every week not to tell us. I was CONVINCED I was having girl twins - I even bought lots of girly outfits (which I still have). We had our two girl names all picked out but had never agreed on boy names...then BAM all of a sudden we had two boys. One of the reasons I found out the gender with ds3 and probably will again with this one is that I will always feel guilty that when the doctor said 'It's a boy!' when the first twin was born my first thought was of disappointment. Of course I loved them to bits immediately, but it was that initial moment that makes me feel guilty.
It is, isn't it? I adore her so much and I hate that she's having to go through it. She lost her father when we were kids and has said that the pain from that PALES in comparison.Quote:
Originally Posted by zanacal
But yes, it sounds like lots of you boy moms have sons who don't fit the traditional mold, and my girls sure don't ... and I LOVE it! So it will be really funny for us if this little girl ends up being the disney princess type that so many of my friends seem to have. That will definitely bring something different to our family!
Oh DM that's really just exactly how I felt re: finding out, I needed to put the hope to rest. I've always wanted a son. And with each pregnancy that hope was always there, and in between them it was nice to know that "maybe next time" it would happen ... but this pregnancy I knew there wouldn't be a next time, and I was really ready to be done with hoping and know my final results. And while yes, I wanted a son, I'm very much at peace knowing now that I will not have one. I'll have three healthy girls :) It was really precious getting to see her today and I can't wait to meet her and fall in love with what matters, who she is!Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
I think how we're raised definitely plays a part in our hopes for the gender of our children. My dad was not part of my life and my mom, well, she really, really screwed a whole lot up. We were not close. So I didn't want a daughter. But of course as an adult you realize it isn't the gender that makes the relationship, like Zan said too. It's the RELATIONSHIP that makes the relationship, LOL! And I plan on building strong ones with my girls. And ideally, a strong one between the 3 of them. I would love nothing more than to see them as adults have a really strong bond, and be each other's best friends.
FWIW (I think I'm the only girl mom here but Flava's chiming in now) my DH is VERY close with his mother. They've always been close. It definitely played a part in me wanting a son, seeing their bond. And as her daughter-in-law I couldn't adore her more :)
Oh MAN I hope I get some good sons-in-law, LOL!
Anyhow, y'all have all really helped me work through this today and I so appreciate it! It's a heavy topic and not nearly as fun as chatting about pudding! I clearly have lots of pink dust to spread around so please, take it ... I hope you all get your girls!! Can't wait for all the ultrasounds now :)
WOW! So you didn't know with the twins, I bet that was hard suddenly having to pick out 2 names when you hadn't planned on it!Quote:
Originally Posted by Mochagirl
I also didn't want even a hint of disappointment on the birthday; I think like you Mocha it would have passed quickly but it would have been there for sure. I'm worried DH might have a minute or two, I hate knowing he'll likely get some comments from his friends like "sorry you didn't get a boy" ... but ... he wants a surprise, and I'm sure he'll deal with it and move on and be just fine. I'm not at all concerned that he'll have any real disappointment or regret for having girl #3.
Ok ... round 1 of lowering DH's expectations complete, LOL! And as you'll see he really was already pretty low... in a good way given what I know now. He's still at work (going to have to pay for 3 colleges plus weddings, now :rofl:) so we were just talking on the phone.
Me: "Ok so I had a dream last night that we had a girl. And she was born, and we had no name. At all. We called her Three."
Him: "I've been telling you for 4 months now it's going to be a girl; we don't make boys. So yes, we should probably pick a name."
Me: "I know. I just kept thinking, since I've had 2 boy dreams (that is true by the way) that we could maybe bypass it this time. But it definitely could be another girl and I guess I need to get ready for that."
Him: "It is what it is, and whoever it is God chose for us, and it's going to be amazing to have it in our arms next year. But you can't rely on Him to pick a name so yeah, you better start thinking about it. And seriously, just go buy something pink and expensive, you know you want to!"
He really is the best. It's a shame he won't have a son but I couldn't ask for a better man to raise my daughters. And yes, I am crying :tissue:
OMG now I am crying......that was so sweet!! And he is great!Quote:
Originally Posted by begonia
Ok ladies....I am back from my 1st appt. and well since my Dr. that I have had forever has switched up how he does things...he takes all his medi-cal patients at the specialty clinic ow and they don't do the U/S there..(he said because they don't have a good enough machine there)..so I get to go back over Wed. to the special office for U/S to determine how far along I really am! He basicly said by the date you gave me for last period you should be 7 almost 8 weeks....but by feel you feel more like 10 weeks.....WHAT??? and by my symptoms he said usually you don't have those ones until about 10 weeks when you are pg..(he was refering to my past pg symptoms)..so he was going by feel and my past experiance with stuff and said 10 weeks! So Wed. we will find out for sure! Funny thing is I instanly thought twins when he said you feel way bigger than 7 weeks! So I still have to wait to see how many and the heart beat!!
Welcome Flava!!! Sorry if you got lost in this thread......I get lost here too! Please stay and chat with us! :bigsmile: I was very happy to read your spotting stopped! And you are only a size 8.......ugh I haven't been an 8 well never....a long time ago I was a 5....now anywhere between 11-13! But I totally get how you feel esp. when you where a 0!
Good morning ladies!! I had the weirdest dream last night! For some reason I was a human with two tiger cubs laying next to me! And when a Mama Tiger came over and started sniffing me I said "here taken them their not mine...I don't know how they got here!" Than I got up and ran...but the little cubs ran after me! Then I woke up...actually DS#3 woke me up wanting to get in my bed!
Oh my goodness, did I forget to welcome you, Flava?? I'm glad you joined us here. Eventually we can try to get a June due date group set up, but so far I think it's just you and me!
Thanks !:o
princess-I really Im big i have a big tummy and some more rolls over that! Im even far on my back Im not kidding! I look normal when Im size 1. I guess my bones are just really light or something like that.
mocha- we better wait for more girls to make a June group lol would be funny if it's just you and me . You see we due on the same day? hehe...I really have no clue when I do because it's asking for cycle length and mine is always different.
And who know really when baby comes right?
princesssarah - can't wait to hear what the verdict is at your scan. Make sure you let us know as soon as you can!
I'm now utterly convinced my colleague is pregnant. Today she said she doesn't fancy what the rest of her family is eating in the evenings lately so she just has pasta and today she randomly asked me which of my benefits I still get working part-time (and the only way to switch to part-time is to have a baby!). If she is, I wonder who is furthest along and who will tell our boss first! I bet it's her so I'll get to do the 'oh by the way, me too ... again' speech!!
That's so cool that we have the same due date! It's going to be a crazy month in our house - my twins' birthday is May 11th and ds3's birthday is June 25th - so this baby will come about halfway between!
My due date changes depending on whether I use the first day of my period or the day I ovulated. I decided to use my ovulation day since I'm pretty sure that's accurate, but I have no doubt that my midwife will use the other date (I think it's June 2nd, since that's what they do). You're right that it doesn't really matter anyway - the baby will come when the baby comes!
Welcome Flava!! xox
Mocha- I ALWAYS give OB's or MW's the date of LMP but I always make sure it's exactly 14 days behind my known ovulation so I have been known to fudge it....LOL I never give my real LMP if I know my O date doesn't fall exactly 14 days later. I know my body better than they do:) If I gave my OB my LMP with this past BFP cycle.....she'd have me due at 38 weeks! I O'd on CD30:)
Z- That's hilarious! Maybe you should tell your boss together...LOL I hated having to tell my boss when pregnant with #1. She HATED kids and always told us how much she hated them...and many people that worked with me(CTV Calgary) did not have kids nor wanted them....so it was a teeny bit awkward. She "let me go' a week later. Nice hey?
B- Your story had me in tears as well! it sounds like you have an incredible hubby and although there may be a tinge of sadness for him, for what will never be....your family will be perfect just the way it was intended:) xoxo :HH:
Princess- Can't wait to hear how it goes! KUP!
Flava I'm sorry you got lost in the shuffle over here, you know we love you :) Fun that you and Mocha have close due dates!
I'm torn as to whether it is good for me personally to be here anymore. I feel so tied to so many of you that I want to know what happens, I want you all to get your DG, but for me right now this feels like a place where I came when I had hope, and not to be all Debbie Downer but I don't have that hope anymore. I have my reality, and my reality is I'm never going to have the son I wanted for all of my life, my DH is never going to have a boy to raise. And that's hard, and while this is a place where I get support on those feelings, I also feel like it might be healthier for me to get on with my life offline and move forward. I never ever saw myself with 3 daughters. Even though I knew for sure it was a possibility and a strong one that our third would also be a girl, I just had that hope. I'm still really glad that I found out because not knowing was worse for sure. But now that my hope is gone, and I'm not having any more kids, I think I need to move on for my own mental health. I'll no doubt lurk here and there to check on everyone and maybe one day (especially once she's here) I'll be able to come back fully to catch up, but right now, I need to focus on what I have, 3 healthy girls, and coming here reminds me of what I don't, and that's not healthy for me. Like I said, I'm sure I'll pop on, but it's not going to be daily or anywhere close to it. All that to say, I'm out for awhile. I love this place, and love y'all, and wish everyone the best! :kiss:
Z - I think you should talk privately to your co-worker to find out and share your news if she is - only if you know her well, of course - it would be nice to have an ally at work in on your shared secret!
DM - that's a good idea about changing your LMP with your midwife! It always drove me nuts that they had a different due date than I was using for ds, and a few days difference can become important if you're having a VBAC like me - they'll only let you go so late and I don't even think they will induce in my case but rather have another c-section!
Z-i would tell it first so you dont have to say me too...
mocha- I wanted a October baby boy ! But that was before ...I so dont care anymore when just be a boy lol. And we have no bd at all around June so good for me.
DD-thanks! That is such a good idea to do!!! If they always count 14 days then I think I better do it too because my O was on cd 17.
begonia - we'll miss you, but we understand. I did the same thing when I found out ds3 was coming - that same week tons of women on IG I'd become close with found out they were having girls, and though I was elated for them, it made my GD even worse. One thing about these gender websites is I think they do keep GD alive and make it harder to move on and accept your one gender family.Take a break but hopefully don't stay away for long. :HH:
I'm not sure if you'll see this.....but I TOTALLY understand. Once I have my scan, I can't say if I'll be here much either. I know that I'll lurk for sure and see how all my girls are doing:) To be honest, I just don't know if I can hear "boy" and then be here to watch others get their desired genders. That will be very hard for awhile I think. I hope your pregnancy is beautiful and smooth and I can't wait to hear about the birth of your little one! I'll be thinking of you~~~ xoxoxQuote:
Originally Posted by begonia
Saw these as I had to pop back in to give love to Princessap ... yet again, such a dose of perspective. I wish everyone could just get pregnant, KWIM? Gender is a bonus. And I know we all know that but at the same time it's easier to know in your head than your heart.
Thank you guys for understanding where I'm coming from, I knew y'all would! FX you get your DG this time around! Now I really, really need to go take a break :)
I found that REALLY hard last time. What helped me was when a couple of other women who had swayed and not gotten their desired gender contacted me by PM to see how I was doing and tell me they knew exactly what I was going through. I found I was able to take a break and come back, though my heart still twinged when someone announced that their sway worked. I'll admit I'm scared of how I'll react to the news this time around. Last time I had the reassurance of knowing I could try one more time, but this time I don't have that...this is DEFINITELY our last baby. I have a feeling I'll have to take a long break if I hear boy too. I find I'm already getting scared about the gender scan and it's at least 3 months away for me!!Quote:
Originally Posted by DoulaMama
Begonia - I'll miss you but I understand and I'm sure you're doing the right thing for your sanity. Please, please do pop back every now and again and let us know how you are and what you're up to though :D
Flava - I'm going to try and wait until after our 12 week u/s to tell the world this time around, mainly because I don't want the boys to hear that mummy has a baby in her tummy until we're sure that everything is ok. So I'll keep my trap shut for them!! Did you spotting stop after that one time? How are you feeling?
Mocha - I do have a good relationship with my colleague but she's the sort of person you would be silly to trust with a secret iykwim! In a way I'd rather she got to 'fess up (if indeed she is pregnant!) first because I don't want to steal her thunder - and I've done this a few times lately :D I'll be looking for advice when it comes to telling my other colleague though - she is having trouble ttc, has been on clomid and looks to be going down the IVF route and tells me a fair bit about it all. That will be difficult.
DM - I had considered giving my midwife the date 14 days before my ovulation date too but I ovulated early in my cycle and I would rather have a later due date because I don't want to be cajooled into having an induction if I go overdue! That said, I don't suppose it makes much difference as the date will be adjusted at my 12 week scan if it's different to what they calculate now. Sod it, I'll do the O-14 day thing then I'll get my scan earlier!!
Oh I don't think I would I move the date if I knew they would move my due date up by a few days...in your case let them have your LMP and you gain a few precious days! I also DO NOT ever let an u/s determine when I'm due if KNOW the day I ovulated. A machine cannot accurately know when your baby is due....u/s's are notoriously wrong. They can put that down in their paperwork if they wish, but my 40 weeks are up when I tell them. :) It's the same with going overdue....if I feel baby is fine at 42w.....we're not inducing. End of discussion. They can't drop care, and they can't force you to do anything against your will. We hire the Dr.'s and MW's and we are in charge of our health and well being. Sorry...just a rant.....I just hate seeing others worried about due dates etc as when it comes down to it....it doesn't really matter because we can refuse their inductions, the "necessary" c-sections, etc.Quote:
Originally Posted by zanacal
Being a VBAC is very difficult in this country. Mocha- just know that with a second VBAC you have a .03% higher chance at rupture than a person who has never had a section. Basically, you have a better chance at getting hit with your sons school bus.... LOL
xoxo
You're preaching to the converted DM! None of my others have been particularly late anyway (+2 days, +3 days and -1 day) so it hopefully won't be something I have to deal with.
Thanks, DM - I did LOTS of research before my first VBAC, so I'm secure in how safe it is. I was induced with my twins since it was my first pregnancy and I didn't know how to advocate for myself yet (I was only 37 weeks 5 days, so no wonder the induction wasn't successful!), but ds3 came one day before his due date, so hopefully I won't go late this time.
Mine have come earlier and earlier...I'm hoping for the same thing too:) Although one of my close friends had 2 at 38 weeks and her last was 41+5! Yikes.....I'm really hoping that never happens again....LOLQuote:
Originally Posted by Mochagirl
Sorry for the preaching!! I went to +11 with one of mine and it was HELL at the Dr's office. I just remember how much they pushed me into unwanted procedures etc and how much I'd regretted it afterwards:(Quote:
Originally Posted by zanacal
We'll miss you Begonia--I totally understand how you feel, having three boys and this is our last baby. Dh may want more, but in my heart I know I am done!!! I never wanted 5 kids, 4 was always maximum, it's the most I can have and still be 100% involved in their lives and be an active mommy! I would probably have to take a break too if I hear boy at my US (still not sure if I'm team green). I never had GD with #3 until I discovered IG. the more I saw women who wanted a Girl, the more it made me want one, need one.... and I do think these kinds of sites bring it on. Anyway, enjoy your Pink bundle--we will all be thinking of you!!! And I love your attitude--hope I have that if I hear boy!
Welcome Flava and Mocha!!:HH:
B, I underStand you having a break:hugs: It iS Soooo nice to eScape the computer for a While and rejoin the real World! Concentrate on the houSe, kidS, XmaS!! I'll pm you aSWell When i get my neW keyboard, i feel retarded on thiS one GRRR!!
Oh it's so sad B. is gone! She was always so nice to me. I get it why it was hard with DD4 back on IG and I didn't even have a nice group there like B. have here. No1 really talked to me after I said girl ...
Z- no more spotting! I really hope it's a sticky baby!
Hi, guys. I really need to catch up w/this thread but I'm just jumping in right now to say, :HH:Begonia:HH:, my heart is breaking into a million pieces for you. By November I'll probably in the exact same situation. You do what you need to do to get through this. Just know that ALL OF US are sending you lots and lots of good thoughts and we are thinking of you. XXXX