ColdWater, can you take a look please?

ttc 5, I've been meaning to ask, are you feeling better?

No cramps or runs for a few hours now. Just had dinner so see how I go wish me luck. Meant to be going back to work tomorrow!

Those gastro bugs are awful, we had a big outbreak of them up here a few months ago. I hope your girls have been looking after you!

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Originally Posted by JoannaK

You've hit the nail on the head TTc, until you're in the same situation, the same shoes, the same experience, you can't POSSIBLY know how it feels. So these people really shouldn't be dishing out advice on how a person should live. I can't imagine what it must be like for that woman, trying to conceive since 2007, that must be awful. But I also know how it feels to see people walking in and out of hospital with healthy babies, and knowing I'll never be bringing mine home. But the thing is, of course I appreciate that this baby is healthy, I'd be a horrible person if I didn't. But the thing is, I've come out the end of it realizing that's it's ok to have these hopes (for a certain gender for example), because the one positive that came out of that hell was my ability to be able to at least try to give myself a break once in awhile, to be ok with hoping for a girl, BECAUSE I know I'm a good mother and I'm going to love and appreciate this baby more than any word I could describe. What I DON'T do is preach to people about what they should or shouldn't do, when I've never been in their situation before

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It is a shame that society has moulded us in to thinking that GD should not be spoken of, or even accepted! That any mother or father suffering GD is a horrible person, ungreatful etc.

The common factor is always people who tend to be close-minded and a little selfish, because they haven't been in someone's shoes, they feel they have a right to make a statement about what's right and wrong, and THAT is wrong. At the very end of the day, it should be about being the best parents we can be, not criticising others for feeling a way that we can't possibly know because chances are, we haven't felt it! What upsets me, is that it seems to take something tragic to really turn ourselves around, I wish the world didn't work that way, but that seems to be how it goes. Something I read the other day too, no idea which website or forum it was on (I think I was looking for how accurate a gender prediction is at 16 weeks, because i'll be 16+4 at my next scan), and this lady said that she really needed to know the gender because it's a big factor in how she bonds with her unborn children, and something really clicked in me when I read that. That REALLY makes sense, to me personally-some people may find it easier to bond even if they didn't know the gender, but for me, I know it would really help

Do unto others as you'd have done unto you.

I don't go on there but seems to me if you want to continue to fuel the fire you can keep going back. If you know you are right, why does it bother you so?

I wouldn't feel good about myself if I threw a comment like that out there.

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Originally Posted by JoannaK

the lady who told me I should be grateful I could even get pregnant because I lost my last baby

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Firstly she never said that......she never mentioned the baby you lost. What she did say was be grateful to be pregnant and think of all the woman out there who can't get pregnant at all. That is totally different to the way you have posted it. And to think that you could actually say something like that or think of saying it is just cruel. I know what it's like to be ttc for a long time. It's heartbreaking especially when everyone around you falls pregnant so easily and you don't know why it's not happening for you or what you can do to fix it. It is a totally different to not knowing the sex of a baby. At least in 2 weeks you will know 100% girl/boy. As I said before I followed your story over the last year and really wanted you to have a girl and was so delighted when I heard you got your BFP especially knowing what you've been through but I don't understand how you could even contemplate posting that. :sad:

And it is very malicious. Very.

What's going on here? I thought this is a u/s thread? So I don't know the story but good think Joanna you didn't said that to anyone...

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Originally Posted by JoannaK

but wouldn't it be the "same thing" if I said to her "well it's a good thing you can't get pregnant because if you did, you could be having constant miscarriages with each successful month" ? Isn't that roughly the same thing?

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No. It really is NOT the same thing.