Due in January, February & March 2019

Hi ladies! I’d love your opinion on a speed bump we are hitting. We have a close family friend who has been ttc for a couple of years. Unexplained secondary infertility. She is wonderful and we have encouraged each other through both of our journeys. She knows that we are either pregnant or done ttc. How should I share our news? Her husband is currently deployed and she is struggling with a lot of different BIG emotions. I don’t want to exclude her from this knowledge and then feel blindsided when we do tell her. I feel like dinner is better. Any advice?


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How soon until her husband is back hannah? If it's doable I'd probably wait until she has him back to turn to for support. She will be happy for you but devasted for herself and will need to have a shoulder to cry on. Not that she couldn't on yours of course but she likely wouldn't (I wouldn't) as she wont want to dampen your happiness as such. Hope that makes sense [emoji4]

Hannah I agree with Pbn's suggestion if it's doable. That's a tough situation to be in I'm sure.

WOW I'm exhausted today. Took an hour or so nap and still want to sleep. And I'm HOT - like face flushed, temp running higher than normal (not fever but close). I'm pretty sure both of those issues are progesterone-related. I had both early in my last pregnancy and I know my progesterone was really high then. I'm guessing it's high again this time because of the Clomid. TP - your progesterone is high this time too yea? Do you find it makes you sleepy and hot??

I’m on progesterone and seem a little hotter than usual. Our home is kept at a cool 68 degrees at night and I’m kickin off covers like it’s 90 in the house!


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Yea I think it must be progesterone... it's very odd for me bc I'm normally always cold!

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Tentatively saying hi and hoping it's ok if I join you in this due date thread. Was too scared to jump in until I had my first scan as very worried I will lose this Bub. Saw heart beat and Bub for the first time today, measuring 6 w 5 days. Hoping that you are both doing ok Hannah and throwaway panther, getting through the first 12 weeks is nail biting and i find the anxiety doesn't get a lot better after that. Hannah I thought it was just me that checked the toilet paper every time, last pregnancy I checked the whole 9 months as I had bleeding and spotting from 8-14 weeks and never felt safe after that thinking it was going to start again any time.

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Originally Posted by Kelbear

Tentatively saying hi and hoping it's ok if I join you in this due date thread. Was too scared to jump in until I had my first scan as very worried I will lose this Bub. Saw heart beat and Bub for the first time today, measuring 6 w 5 days. Hoping that you are both doing ok Hannah and throwaway panther, getting through the first 12 weeks is nail biting and i find the anxiety doesn't get a lot better after that. Hannah I thought it was just me that checked the toilet paper every time, last pregnancy I checked the whole 9 months as I had bleeding and spotting from 8-14 weeks and never felt safe after that thinking it was going to start again any time.

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I'm so happy to see you here and that first scan was good!!

I've been running to check toilet after EVERY pregnancy -- even with DD (especially since I had SO much discharge with her, I always thought it was blood). With this pregnancy I constantly wear light colored underwear and MAKE myself pee all the time to constantly be reassured there's no blood -- I feel nuts!! I was just telling someone on here that I was terrified last night because I was cramping on and off. I read about accommodation pain happening 8-12 weeks with pregnancies after number 1, so could have been that -- but I also turned out to be gassy!! I didn't know it was gas related until I had some "movement" if you get my drift!!

Looks like we'll hopefully have lots of rainbow babies in this DD group!! And now ABC is pregnant too :) I'm excited and cautiously optimistic for all of us!

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Originally Posted by hannahptrussell

Hi ladies! I’d love your opinion on a speed bump we are hitting. We have a close family friend who has been ttc for a couple of years. Unexplained secondary infertility. She is wonderful and we have encouraged each other through both of our journeys. She knows that we are either pregnant or done ttc. How should I share our news? Her husband is currently deployed and she is struggling with a lot of different BIG emotions. I don’t want to exclude her from this knowledge and then feel blindsided when we do tell her. I feel like dinner is better. Any advice?


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Oh wow, that's definitely hard. I've been on the other end for sure (though not necessarily second infertility -- just tons of loss). How far along are you again? I personally would wait until you're definitely out of the first trimester. I think if her husband comes home to support her when you tell her too would help!

I know I was absolutely crushed when people told me they were pregnant right after my losses, especially when I thought some of these people were done/not going to be expecting soon (one friend had TWO announcements in the time since I had my DD to me, and told me right after I lost my spontaneous twins -- I was gutted!; literally the next week after, my cousin who had a 6 year old who had been very vocal about not having anymore after a traumatic birth with her first. That was a bad month!)

But I also know NOT telling said friend until it's very obvious (especially if you see her alot) can be just as hard -- I think doing something for her along with telling her, or maybe including her as much as you could in your words (my one friend stressed how sorry she was for what I was going through and wished we could be going through it together, for example) when you finally tell her.

I feel for both of you! It's so hard to be in either position :( I want you to be able to tell who you want freely and have support -- I also just know how immensely demoralizing it was to hear that sort of news for me during the last year or two :( But I know you've had losses, so you need support too. It's so hard!

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Originally Posted by ABC.2606

Hannah I agree with Pbn's suggestion if it's doable. That's a tough situation to be in I'm sure.

WOW I'm exhausted today. Took an hour or so nap and still want to sleep. And I'm HOT - like face flushed, temp running higher than normal (not fever but close). I'm pretty sure both of those issues are progesterone-related. I had both early in my last pregnancy and I know my progesterone was really high then. I'm guessing it's high again this time because of the Clomid. TP - your progesterone is high this time too yea? Do you find it makes you sleepy and hot??

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I'm totally hot!!! And I am ways cold normally -- last night I could barely sleep because of how hot I felt, and I swear I've had hot flashes throughout this pregnancy!! Though my feet are still cold, as my husband can attest too haha

Not sleepy, but I know that's a normal progesterone symptom! That falls into my, "Where are my symptoms?" concern unless the steroid is keeping me from being tired (though I am falling asleep very quickly when I go to bed!)

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Originally Posted by Pbn3

How soon until her husband is back hannah? If it's doable I'd probably wait until she has him back to turn to for support. She will be happy for you but devasted for herself and will need to have a shoulder to cry on. Not that she couldn't on yours of course but she likely wouldn't (I wouldn't) as she wont want to dampen your happiness as such. Hope that makes sense [emoji4]

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I agree with this! I also don't know if I'd do it over dinner. Giving her a chance to process the news on her own might be better.