gizmo's boy sway

thank you lola that really helps and thanks atomic and everyone else. i do need to "grieve" a little i think. its just weird grieving nw before ive even seen her. i think for me itd be a lot easier if i had her with me but then again with DD2 i had SLIGHT GD but it went away real quick bc she was there. so knowing gender ahead of time may have caused these emotions to linger.. who knows. but youre all right! and i really hope things work out for you lola...i have been thinking about you too!
good luck with everything

Thank you, honey......it is weird to grieve something that wasn't even there...you go through that stuff when you can't have one and think you never will. I think it is REALLY important for all of us to keep in mind that there is no point in worrying about what other people think. Let them think whatever they want...but your life and how you live it is up to you, so you can live it being a happy, glorious mama with 3 beautiful children or you can walk around feeling like a failure because of what you think other people you don't even know must think. It is a huge waste!!!! I hope you shake it all really soon and start to feel like that glorious mama you are!

you are so lola. its hard tho to actually implement that when you see teh faces of the ppl that you tel land hear their words. i wish i had a filter so that i couldnt hear the negative things...but you are right ihave to rise above it

I'm so sorry you didn't hear boy, but congratulations on your baby girl! You sound like you're working through your emotions very well, though. I pray that time will heal your heart and that once your little girl is in your arms, all these feelings will go away. ***HUGS*** to you!

Sorry you didn't hear boy Gizmo, all the best sweetie x

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Originally Posted by gizmo77

im such a perfectionist and thought i had a PERFECT sway and still God (or whoever you believe in) ultimately makes the choice i guess!!!
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I thought you had a perfect sway, too. Seriously, the entire time we were swaying, you were the standard I measured myself to. I just kept thinking your sway HAD to work! So I hope you don't have any regrets--you really did all you could!

I am glad you are at peace with having another little girl! You sound so grounded and level headed--I'm jealous! Glad your DH is being so great, too. :)

Gizmo I didn't have much time earlier but wanted to tell you your post above is really encouraging; I'm glad you are handling it well so far. My GD definitely had waves, and it got MUCH worse before it got better ... I posted it in another thread but to be totally honest it was pretty bad the weeks just prior to her birth. And it really wasn't ever about HER, it was more just the gender DESIRE. I got over the gender disappointment much, much sooner; in fact I really do appreciate having my girls, probably now more than I ever did before. But the gender desire beat me down for awhile during the pregnancy. I have 3 friends due just prior to or just after my own DD3, who were ALL expecting DS after 2DD. That was tough.

The comments from other people also fed into and reinforced my feeling that I was somehow lacking w/o a DS. That somehow 3 healthy DD wasn't a "good" family make-up, and when I was pregnant I really fell for that lie. Also, like you, I'm very much a perfectionist, and the fact that my sway "failed" meant I wasn't "perfect" and I felt hugely disappointed in myself. We might have a 4th but I'm 90% sure I won't sway, I'll just let the chips fall where they may, because for me ... swaying set me up for disappointment in a way leaving it to chance wouldn't have. I think swaying took some of the pure joy and excitement of having another child out of the equation for me, and I was so focused on getting a DS that I forgot the overall goal of just expanding our family... that goal we successfully accomplished! So I definitely learned that my personality and swaying don't mix :) I'd for sure be hoping for a DS if we have a 4th, but I won't have a 4th if I'm not OK with another DD.

Comments suck and I get a ton of them, but now that she's here I really, truly don't care a bit what people have to say. Because I see her now as a person, not just a "girl" baby in my belly. She's going to be an individual unlike either of her 2 sisters, someone new to love and appreciate and drive me crazy :rofl: So people's comments really don't get to me and I typically either say something sassy or just smile and don't say anything, which always unnerves the commenter :) Whenever someone says something to DH about being surrounded by all girls he laughs and says that for YEARS he prayed for girls to love him and God answered it abundantly, so he considers himself lucky. Your DH sounds like he's doing really well with it too and that is fantastic, because if you have a low day he can pick you up. I really don't know what I would have done if DH had GD as badly as I did ... he was totally my rock through it.

Anyhow I hope you stick around! There were several times in my pregnancy I had to take a break from this place, but overall ... the support and encouragement from people who really do understand was invaluable. :hug2:

Congratulations on your healthy baby !!!!
I'm in the same boat, it seems it's girl#3 for us, but I'm coping very, very bad with it so far :(

I'm glad you're practically over GD ( if there was any?) and I love the way you think, helped me a lot.
I never wanted more then 3 ( DH wanted only 2 :rolleyes:) but I caught myself thinking about the possibility of 4th baby :p

Only thing is: what if it's a girl again? I think that might prevent me to try for #4. DH is strongly against anyway, says we can't afford another baby.

I would do IVF/PGD in a heart beat if I had money, I would go for twin boys. I even found a clinic VERY near where we live. Maybe if I get BINGO or something....

Like you said, I know I should be grateful there is no down syndrome, chromosome issues, heart abnormalities etc. My DH said it's a blasphemy that I'm so unhappy for getting a healthy child.

Can't wait your next sway :p

gizmo-congrats on your baby girl! Im sorry you didn't hear boy but it's so great you don't really have GD!
You can see Im pregnant and already thinking it's a girl for sure and it makes me very sad! really who got 5 girls?
Also I think your sway is so good and it still didn't worked so why would it work for me, right? I think some of us just can sway forever and it's not going to work for us no matter what.
Today is just bad for me...I feel very stupid trying again I should have learned already. I just hope I will be like you when I hear girl again.I don't want DG I want to be happy for a new baby.
Your DH is very nice he is right don't listen to the stupid comments.

My grandma is one of 6 girls and our pastor also has 6 girls (and they are the kindest, sweetest, loveliest girls you ever saw!! except yours of course flava!)