Hello there ... 40 year old, two boys, Vasectomy Reversal ahead of us.

I've been thinking of how you are getting a long! I'm glad you like your new job!

Be kind to yourself. When it comes to matters of the heart, they cannot always be rationalized while at the same time being completely valid. The heart wants what the heart wants. I don't think it is a matter of being fulfilled by what you have- you seem very satisfied with your family. Rather it seems that someone else is missing.

I hope that your DH becomes on board with the decision to TTC, since he is the one getting a procedure done to make it happen. Don't beat yourself up over this, if it is something you truly want. From my experience with having a DH waffling with having another child, it may be easier for him to come around to the idea if he can see that you really want it and can handle it. My DH cancelled his vasectomy last month and is excited about having a 4th child after spending all of last year not wanting another. He said that my unwavering desire and calmness about our current family made him able to see how we can manage having a 4th child. I'm not saying it will be easy, but having the right frame of mind about adding another child to the family and talking it through with him will help.

I'll be sending you clarity of mind and strength your way! Hang in there sweetie!



[emoji170][emoji1379]DS1, [emoji577]DS2, & [emoji602]DS3[emoji170]
[emoji166]One Last Pink Sway[emoji166]
https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920/thumb.png
My Ovulation Chart

Because I had my two boys, and then 13 years later, had the three little ones, I think people tended to open up to me about this issue more than they do normally. And I would guess a good 30 women, at the least, told me that they had always wanted one more child but their husband said no. These were strangers - people I met in doctors offices or the supermarket or the library. They would ask about my weird family and then immediately tell me the story - women of all ages, too. Young, old, everywhere in between. It was just an immediate reaction so it was something that was obviously a part of them, something that was on their minds, almost like it was a shared female emotion or something :)

There are two things I take away from that experience:

1)That many of us just have the desire for one more. I feel done, but I often wish I had sneaked in an extra one or two between DS 2 and 3. I was just thinking about it this morning. sometimes dream that I'm pregnant and I feel happy about it (even though it would probably kill me LOL - kids and I have been sick for a month straight and I feel like one germ away from the asylum) So this may be a natural feeling that we all have from time to time, and maybe just something that never totally goes away. (although I do know a fair number of women who just aren't that into it, no right or wrong of course)

2)That at the same time, since so many women do have this feeling, maybe, just maybe, it's worth listening to. Do some women ride the baby train too long and have more kids than they probably should, yeah, but most of us are NOT those people. Most of us have 1-3 kids and could easily take care of 1-2 more without any great suffering on anyone's part. It may even be good for our husbands and other kids - my husband dotes on our littler ones in a way that he never did with our older two, and I think that overall it's been highly beneficial for my 3 to have just that much less one on one time. Yes, you read that right. I was my parents' only child and ALL the attention was on me for better or for worse - usually for worse. I find that my 3 smaller kids benefit hugely in terms of me not doing everything for them, having more independence, being self-starters, etc than my first two did. So it's not always a question of us "doing bad things" to our hubbies and kids, and if we find it fulfilling, maybe that is all the justification we need. :)

YOLO.

I am going to do it. VR will be on February 17.
Will need a lot of vibes and prayers for health....

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Sweetplum

I am going to do it. VR will be on February 17.
Will need a lot of vibes and prayers for health....

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You got it sweetie. I'm sending lots of strength and health your way [emoji8][emoji94]



[emoji170][emoji1379]DS1, [emoji577]DS2, & [emoji602]DS3[emoji170]
[emoji166]One Last Pink Sway[emoji166]
https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/579920/thumb.png
My Ovulation Chart

I have 5 kids, I'm 40, I was done having kids... and here I am. I suffered huge depression and anxiety for more than a year - like take medication for it, see a counselor kind. Because of wanting another baby so much and my husband really not.

It was quite the year...

My husband decided after I spent some serious soul searching trying to take note of what he was trying to tell me (and finally succeeding)... that he's great with another baby. [emoji15] Astounded sort of doesn't cover how I feel about it. We met with our counselor to be sure (for me to be sure) he wasn't changing his mind just to make me happy. I was afraid of moving forward with a husband who hated being a stay at home Dad to a new baby.

I feel like sometimes we can't get rid of that feeling because we aren't supposed to... that someone else is waiting for us. Maybe that's hokey.

I wish you the best of luck and health, moving forward. [emoji175]

Sweetplum. Yeahhhhh. VR-date set. That's great news. I am sure you are doing the right thing. So happy your DH is on board.


Mother to 3 handsome boys ❤️ and pregnant with a baby girl due in June 2017 [emoji120]. DW (41) [emoji1326] DH (38) [emoji144]

Thank you all :)
I just purchased the TTC girl bundle. Can someone tell me how to access the questionnaire I need to fill out for Atomic?
Other tips. Having a hard time figuring out next step.

Thanks for your purchase!! The questionnaires are here in this link (you have to scroll down past another couple of questionnaires though) http://genderdreaming.com/forum/misc.php?do=forms

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Sweetplum

Thank you all :)
I just purchased the TTC girl bundle. Can someone tell me how to access the questionnaire I need to fill out for Atomic?
Other tips. Having a hard time figuring out next step.

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Once I get the questionnaire I'll make the plan but you can always hit me up between then and now with any questions or concerns.

One thing that jumps out at me right this minute is PLEASE do not have your husband start any supps until after he is fully recovered from his surgery. Even if tons of other people are on them, they may cause harmful side effects were a person to take them prior to surgery. :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

Once I get the questionnaire I'll make the plan but you can always hit me up between then and now with any questions or concerns.

One thing that jumps out at me right this minute is PLEASE do not have your husband start any supps until after he is fully recovered from his surgery. Even if tons of other people are on them, they may cause harmful side effects were a person to take them prior to surgery. :)

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Thanks Atomic. I just filled out the questionnaires. I plan to go to Whole Foods tomorrow to pick up a few things - if you get this note in the next few hours let me know if I should pick up any supplements for myself. I'm currently taking 120mg of Ubiquinol and 800 MCG of folic acid (not folate). If you have suggestions I'll grab stuff trmw...

Hi!! I'm new here... well I read the girl sway threads all the time but I never post. Congrats on the vr and girl sway!! Lots of luck to you!!
I was actually curious though if atomic had any thoughts on whether vr swayed pink??
Iam 31, my dh had his vr in March of last year only to find out last month that it was unsuccessful and he will have to have a redo vr. I had cut out cereal, meats (except egg whites), no breakfast eat around 11:00 am and cut off at 6;00. Sometime I broke it cause my sugar would drop when I exercised to much. Sorry I'm getting off topic �� Now with me not knowing if he'll even be able to have kids Im seriously dreading starting a diet again... so I was curoius if after our 2 boys and two reverse vasectomies is the chance of a girl away increased because of his lower sperm count?
Any input on diet and anything else is GREATLY appreciated!!
Sweetplum, I just wanted to say congrats again on your job and vr!!! Best wishes to you and yours!!!!!!!!!!!!

I do think VR sways pink - no guarantee but yes.

You would still need to do a diet. But you were eating a pretty restrictive diet by the sound of it, we may be able to work it out so it's much easier for you to stick with, please start a thread where I can help!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Sweetplum

Thanks Atomic. I just filled out the questionnaires. I plan to go to Whole Foods tomorrow to pick up a few things - if you get this note in the next few hours let me know if I should pick up any supplements for myself. I'm currently taking 120mg of Ubiquinol and 800 MCG of folic acid (not folate). If you have suggestions I'll grab stuff trmw...

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I have your questionnaire!! I am of the less is more approach with the supps. Some take fiber but I am probably not going to have you do that to hopefully boost odds of conception a bit.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

I have your questionnaire!! I am of the less is more approach with the supps. Some take fiber but I am probably not going to have you do that to hopefully boost odds of conception a bit.

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Sounds good. Looking forward to hearing your insights. Have a great weekend.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Godislove

Hi!! I'm new here... well I read the girl sway threads all the time but I never post. Congrats on the vr and girl sway!! Lots of luck to you!!
I was actually curious though if atomic had any thoughts on whether vr swayed pink??
Iam 31, my dh had his vr in March of last year only to find out last month that it was unsuccessful and he will have to have a redo vr. I had cut out cereal, meats (except egg whites), no breakfast eat around 11:00 am and cut off at 6;00. Sometime I broke it cause my sugar would drop when I exercised to much. Sorry I'm getting off topic �� Now with me not knowing if he'll even be able to have kids Im seriously dreading starting a diet again... so I was curoius if after our 2 boys and two reverse vasectomies is the chance of a girl away increased because of his lower sperm count?
Any input on diet and anything else is GREATLY appreciated!!
Sweetplum, I just wanted to say congrats again on your job and vr!!! Best wishes to you and yours!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Godislove,
Thank you for the post. I'm sorry to hear about the VR not working out the first time. Wanted to ask how your DH handeled the VR, was it painful - how was his recovery? How is he handling things knowing he will be having another surgery? Why did it not work the first time around? Just curious - would like to hear as much as you are willing to share.

Interesting point about VR swaying girl.

In terms of my own personal diet. I've been experimenting with LE for about a year now : cutting out breakfast, no snacking, lots of coffee, an alcoholic drink at night, pretty much cut out meat, lots of veggies. We will see...

Best wishes to you and keep in touch.
Sweetplum.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Sweetplum

Godislove,
Thank you for the post. I'm sorry to hear about the VR not working out the first time. Wanted to ask how your DH handeled the VR, was it painful - how was his recovery? How is he handling things knowing he will be having another surgery? Why did it not work the first time around? Just curious - would like to hear as much as you are willing to share.

Interesting point about VR swaying girl.

In terms of my own personal diet. I've been experimenting with LE for about a year now : cutting out breakfast, no snacking, lots of coffee, an alcoholic drink at night, pretty much cut out meat, lots of veggies. We will see...

Best wishes to you and keep in touch.
Sweetplum.

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Hi Sweetplum!! Thank you for your diet input!! I'm trying to slowly start back... I have skipped breakfast past few days, I still have my warm lemon water in the am (I know I gotta quit that once I run out of the lemons in the fridge lol) and I'm working out 5-6 days a week so maybe I can get diet under control again. As for his vr (sorry if this is too much detail) but doc said the procedure should take 2 hrs for each side. After 6 hrs in surgery (instead of 4) the doc said one side was cut to severely and there wasn't enough tube to reconnect it. he said the other side was successful (vas to vas connection) so as long as it didn't scar or blow out then he suspected 80 percent success on that side. The thing is we live far away from the surgeon so three days after his surgery he Started having pain and severely swelling .. that lasted about a month. Because we lived far away the doc said to go to the ER if it leaked (but it didn't) otherwise wait it out. (He suspected he had a blowout due to swelling) We tried for a few months and I knew (cause we got bfp with both boys first try). Anyways doc set up sa testing found it wasn't successful and referred us to the doctor with the highest success rate in our state because the next doc performs a Vasoepididymostomy instead of a vas to vas procedure. Not sure if your formulaic with the reversal techniques or not... the Vasoepididymostomy is a much more delicate procedure that not all urologist can perform and they don't usually know if it will be needed till the surgeon is in surgery. So, I would suggest to ask the surgeon if they also perform the other procedure if it is needed, otherwise he may need to have a second surgery. That being said, i was told it is not that common to need Vasoepididymostomy instead of vasectomy procedure so I'm sure yours dh will go great!! My dh said this will be last attempt as it was too painful. And I really don't want him to have to again anyways. Sorry it's so long... but I know I tried to research and research and didn't find much experience or information about the procedure. I'm sure yours will be a far better one than ours!! Bag of frozen peas are best and Motrin for the scaring (if he can take Motrin). Good luck!! And baby dust!!! God bless!!!! Thanks again for your reply!!

Ps I had thought low sperm count swayed girl so I thought it would stand to reason that a vr would sway girl??.... just a thought (or wishful thinking lol)

I do think it sways girl. Good luck ladies! :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

I do think it sways girl. Good luck ladies! :)

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Thank you Atomic!!! 😊 lots of baby dust Sweetplum!!

Less than 20 days to my husband's VR. After a rough patch for us about two weeks ago, he has come around and he and I both feel very close. I don't blame him for being nervous and unsure. My swaying is going OK. I'm probably not as strict about it as I should be. Maybe when things get more real after the VR my motivation to be 100% diligent will kick in? To be honest, the idea of either a girl OR a boy is delightful to me - which is probably part of the reason for my relaxed attitude.

That is actually a GOOD thing. For reasons we don't totally understand, the people who are the most highly motivated, dotting every i, crossing every t, end up having opposites more than I'd like to see. Something about the rigorousness and level of constant committment to juggling tons of swaying balls in the air may sway more blue than any of the details they are worrying about. :)

Just wanted to say GL Sweetplum!!! Read through the whole thread and hope everything works out for you! :)

Tomorrow we will go in for my husband's vasectomy reversal.

We have come so far from a year ago at this time. Many ups and downs, but we are both happy and although I have my worries I know that in the long run this is not the wrong move for our family. I hope that makes sense...I don't know what the future will bring us but I do know that this step tomorrow is the right one.

Despite the fact that I have been ambiently swaying for over a year now, it is difficult for me to get excited about TTC until I know my husband is ok and makes it through the surgery ok. I am very lucky to have a man who loves me enough to understand the regret I have over the V and put this in context with the concerns he has about the procedure.

Wish us luck tomorrow.

Good luck and wishing him a speedy recovery!!

The VR procedure was a success...just talked to dr. He was able to direct connect both sides with ease and found moving sperm and copious clear fluid. All great news. Also, he may have actually remedied a blockage/leaking sperm issue that has been causing DH pain since the V.

Now looking forward to spending the weekend spoiling my sweet husband rotten...

That's great news! I'm dropping off baby dust for you [emoji597][emoji92][emoji93][emoji94]! Enjoy your weekend [emoji6]!



[emoji170][emoji1379]DS1, [emoji577]DS2, & [emoji602]DS3[emoji170]
[emoji166]EDD 9/30/2017 [emoji1317]for pink[emoji166]
https://lmtm.lilypie.com/Tub9m6.png

Oh that's great news!!! :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:

Great. So happy VR is over and went great. Now you can look forward to the fun part. So exited for you. Cheers


Mother to 3 boys ❤️ and pregnant with a baby girl due in June 2017 [emoji120]. DW (41) [emoji1326] DH (38) [emoji144]

Thank you all. DH is resting at home and in the best mood. :) He even said on the way home that he's looking forward to a third baby and asked me if I had thought of any names....I told him right now I just want him to heal up.

I knew for him it was the fear of the VR. He said so far it's been smoother than the original V. To be continued.

I am very thankful for my husband....regardless of what this next chapter brings us. I'm happy to turn the page on this past chapter.

:heart: Give him an extra big hug for all of us.

First day back at work was good for him. He hasn't needed any pain meds other than 1-2 Tylenol a day. I'm very impressed. He's so happy and chipper ❤️

Yay!! That's amazing!! So happy everything went smoothly! Wishing you lots of Baby dust and God bless you all on your family's journey!!!!!

Got the thumbs up from the urologist this afternoon. Husband is feeling great. Here goes nothing!

Woohoo! Sending loads of baby dust your way [emoji597][emoji92][emoji93][emoji94]



[emoji170][emoji1379]DS1, [emoji577]DS2, & [emoji602]DS3[emoji170]
[emoji166]EDD 9/30/2017 [emoji1317]for pink[emoji166]
https://lmtm.lilypie.com/Tub9m6.png

So happy for you that you passed this chapter with bravour. When are you attempting?


Mother to 3 boys ❤️ and pregnant with a baby girl due in June 2017 [emoji120]. DW (41) [emoji1326] DH (38) [emoji144]

Wonderful news!

Thank you ladies!
We tried a few nights ago and I'm probably ovulating today or tomorrow, so technically I guess we've already begun :)

All went well, my husband had been experiencing pain as a result of the vasectomy and he is over the moon that the pain is now gone. The urologist had said the reversal should fix the pain and it has.

I'm so happy for him and we feel very close.

We shall see what happens, I'm not wasting any time getting started...but I'm also not super hopeful to be honest.

:cheer: great news! Good luck and pink dust!

Still here, TTC. Period is on its way tmrw, can feel it coming...
Feeling like odds are stacked against us.

They are, but the odds don't tell the whole story. People do things that go against the odds every day!

Remember, your odds are higher than if you hadn't done all this!

Can you give me a rundown of everything you're doing and I can tell you what to tweak??

Attachment 36161

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Sweetplum

Still here, TTC. Period is on its way tmrw, can feel it coming...
Feeling like odds are stacked against us.

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I'm sorry 😐 but yes at least your trying! We had second vasectomy reversal done and had a cycle and found out for sure no baby dice by way of af today. Maybe baby sway is hindering chance of pregnancy. 🤷🏼*♀️
I'm sure atomic will have lots of excellent advice to help :) try to keep positive and have fun :) wishing you lots and lots of baby dust!! I know being possitive is easier said than done :(