Soar...praying for your grandmother...<3
Thanks Rainbow!! XOXO
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Soar...praying for your grandmother...<3
Thanks Rainbow!! XOXO
Oh Emily, at least they'll be able to get a brilliant shot at 22 weeks! Glad that bub was ok, always reassuring to see that wee heart beating.
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Hi ladies, I had my 19 week scan today... baby looked amazing and all is on track. When asked if we wanted to find out I couldn't say NO fast enough... but spent the entire appointment scouring for clues, even when she was checking all the vital organs all I could think or look for were BITS! The delivery room surprise is what I personally need to overcome any GD... how can I be sad if I see a beautiful, perfect little boy? I've attached a pic if anyone can make out a nub... The picture is looking directly down at the baby, not side on. (Not sure how reliable it is at 19w?!) Thanks anyhoo! x
No idea, Am....but a beautiful baby!!!
Seriously, this pregnancy is killing me! A major reason why I'm already encouraging DH to go get his V done! I *think* I've been having severe anxiety since 5 weeks (simply because I don't really know if it's classified as anxiety what I'm feeling.) Up until my 20 week scan I would be so sick with worry something would show up on the scan so I think thats where most of my anxiety came from but now that it's over with and showed everything looking perfect I'm still waking up every morning with a nervous/sick butterfly feeling in my stomach for no reason! I'm a stay at home mom so it's not like i'm worried about work for the day or whatever. I got to bed and wake up feeling so tired and anxious like my brains been worrying all night long. I am going to be so happy when December comes because I'm having a hard time keeping it under control and I refuse to take medication for it while pregnant. Ugh.. the joys. Never had this symptom before, that's for sure!
Oh Hun that is something you could do without ! What about seeing a psychologist to learn some relaxation techniques ? I'm on Zoloft for anxiety and depression which I didn't want to take while preg but it does help me a lot and my psychologist hypnotised me as well which helps with the gender disappointment . I hope you can get some help with it as it can be taxing on you xxxQuote:
Originally Posted by MSBLAKELY
I took Zoloft for DS3's pregnancy & he is the SMARTEST kid...I often wonder if that's why.
I totally understand how you feel, MsB...
I get anxious, too.
My doctor wouldn't put me on Zoloft again, but did tell me I could take 1 Benadryl to take the edge off when it strikes.
If I were you, I'd talk to my doctor.
So sorry you're dealing with this...it's the worst.
Grace, Beadin - I have friends who've taken it through pregnancy too and been totally fine. I've never been on any anxiety meds before pregnancy so I just wouldn't want to try and figure out what works for me for the first time ever when pregnant - and I still feel like I can somewhat control it. But it's hard and I'm glad you guys have found ways to relieve it because it's so annoying!! I am going to bring it up again at my next appt. and see what she says. Glad to hear I'm not alone though.. it's so weird and having never experienced it before its definitely tiring!
Another reason why I think I want to stay team green and not cave at my next ultrasound because I know with GD added on top of this i'd be a loose canon! Already I'm so snappy and on the edge if i'm anxious about something so I like the idea of having a full day or two by myself with DH in the hospital to deal with our GD if this is a boy and then move on so that I can be a good mom for my boys instead of take out my random moments of frustration on them for the next 15 weeks!
Beadin and Rainbow-thank you so much for the prayers. She needs them. Took another downhill turn this morning. This is a real roller coaster ride. :-(
MrsBlakely-hopefully you get some relief or you are able to get some restful sleep asap. You definitely need one or the other. Hugs!
Ladybugs-hoping you are getting some very healthy pink news today!
AFM-I ate 2 donuts this morning and had nachos for lunch. I am definitely eating my emotions today. :-( Hoping for good news tomorrow on Grandma and then maybe I will have a salad!
Soar...I just want to say how sorry I am about your grandma. That was us about 1.5 years ago and while she pulled through...we know that the next time around it will be somber news. Lots of hugs....I can only imagine how you feel when preggo and dealing with news like this...do you have any good support around you???? ((((hugs))))
AFM...just bumped to second position...roughly 45 more mins of waiting for the second half of the appt. I will update in the TTCpink and beyond thread, unless things go wild and then Dream will for me.
Soar I'm so sorry about your grandma, I have lost all 4 of my grandparents now, but my grandma who passed 2 years ago was the most difficult as I was so close to her (she lived with us for years before needing a higher level of care). I struggle with the idea this baby will be the only one that my grandma didn't meet. Thats why if its a girl, the middle name will be May, which was her middle name.
MsBlakely I'm sorry you have anxiety in pregnancy, I had it with ds1 and it got worse after a horrible delivery. I often wish I had spoken to a psychologist earlier, and gotten some relaxation techniques because i've since had friends that learned some with postnatal anxiety (remember how postnatal depression is so promoted now? well they are finally recognising anxiety as part of the same disorder, which stems from a hormonal imbalance due to the pregnancy and or delivery, and sometimes is made worse or triggered by traumatic birth or loss). So I've had friends who needed medication in or after pregnancy (there is some trial and error in finding the right one, so as someone said, experimenting in pregnancy isnt ideal if you've never been on one before) and also friends that got help from a psychologist that specialised in prenatal and postnatal anxiety, and all had a good measure of success. I would start by hunting down a psychologist that specialises in disorders of this spectrum because the techniques they give you are going to be far more effective.
hugs
good luck ladybugs!
MsBlakely - Funny you should bring this up...was just thinking today that I am possibly on the edge of depression. Never been "clinically" depressed before, and never dealt with even mild depression (for an extended period of time)...so have never been on meds, either. But now I am wondering if I should talk to my doc about it! I have a friend who has PPD with her babies, and also struggles outside of pregnancy. In her last pg, she took Zoloft, and I think the transition after baby was here was much better. Doc had her wean off before delivery, but I'm pretty sure she went back on after she was born. I can't remember the reason for the weaning off...but anyway, don't know if I'm quite there yet (needing meds), but I just have a feeling if I hear boy next week, it will send me over the edge. You are so right...taking it out on your family is a real possibility. I feel like that's what I'm doing right now with the boys...I'm not really even able to enjoy them. DS1 is just a hard kid sometimes, and right now, I feel like I can barely put up with him. I find myself sinking to some of his childish behavior, because so much of what he says/does rubs me the wrong way (he is very controlling, must be in charge, must be first, etc., etc.). DS2 is my easiest, but he sometimes has pottying issues that drive me up the wall (he's been trained since 2.5, and he's 4 on Thursday). DS3 is absolutely cute as a button, but he's turned a corner recently into doing things that I think he knows (even at 15 months) are naughty. Just ridiculously into things, throwing his food, cup, etc. It, once again, drives me nuts. DS2 started preschool today, which I know will help, since the older 2 fight constantly. DS1 won't start school till Sept. 3 (he is going to a brand-new school and the building is still being finished). That will help tremendously, I know. But I feel TERRIBLE for honestly feeling like it's tough to enjoy them right now. And I'm about to add another one?? OMG!!!! I seriously thought I would have a girl, that is why I got pg. See?? I need help, don't I?? Ugh, totally get how you feel!
Ladybugs - Thinking of you. Can't wait to hear!
Soar - Still praying. I can't imagine dealing with that while pregnant! Keep us posted.
AFM - Aah, see above. Haha!
I can completely identify with this, feeling like they are driving you mad, or sinking into their behaviour when you are tired, stressed, at the end of your tether. my ds1 is also super challenging and even at 4 is far more work than ds2 who just turned 2. Mind you even the easy kids turn 2 eventually, and now we are having tantrums that involve dropping to the floor and refusing to move. They are usually timed right when i'm trying to get them into the car to go to daycare/work or bringing shopping inside or something. I physically cant pick him up anymore when he does that, so my old response of just throwing him over my shoulder, getting him to where he needs to be then letting him cry it out and get over it isnt working now i'm pregnant. I already hurt my back trying it! I tried walking off on him (like walking down the hallway to the garage and pretending to leave) but he just gets up and goes off to do whatever he wanted, rather than following like ds1 would have. I tried talking him out of it but we all know how useful that is with 2 year old tantrums. Thankfully because hes easygoing the tantrums dont last long at all, and are not frequent so hoping he just grows out of it and we can not draw too much attention to it in the meantime. Ds1 is still my biggest challenge and I often wonder if i'm mad having more!!Quote:
Originally Posted by myrainbowgirl
Rainbow, Meeks - I totally feel you and this anxiety is constantly making me question or worry if I made the wrong decision having another. To us as a family, two just doesn't seem right and feels so incomplete so it was a given we'd have a third but 100% I'm stopping there. I worry I'll be in over my head too as boys can be hard - I have the same thing, DS1 is more of a challenge at almost 4 and DS2 who's almost 2 is starting the tantrum/whiny stage so days do get long an tiring. I think having depression, or anything like that is only made worse by being a mom as that's such a stressful job already! I just know i'll have another boy and worry my life will be chaos. I definitely am going to watch myself once the baby comes because I will go on something if I need to as I also know it can become worse after. I have 3 close girlfriends who all have anxiety and depression and are all on medication for pretty severe PPD. They all struggled with it years before having babies so I'm sure thats why they have bad cases, but it does seem to be quite common. Luckily I'm able to keep most emotions under control, and DH is so good at talking me out of my crazy brain! I can tell its almost all hormone related as I don't even know what's causing the panicky feeling. Kids are amazing and although they can somedays drive me mad, I still could go in a cry watching them sleep and thinking of how fast they grow. I think I need to really keep that in mind with this baby to know that all the hard stages DO pass!
I agree. We are in exactly the same boat and wanted more than two, so this wasn't just about swaying to begin with for me, and I am 99% sure this will be our last. DH is 'having the chop' after this one is born. I still worry that i'm stupid to add to this chaos when I already have plenty of moments where i'm far from the ideal parent. The one thought that calms me is that this is our last. If I have a hard day I think, yes but this will only be for a short period of time, and sure its going to get worse before it gets better but its going to be over very soon too. Or that really really constant push-every-button sleep deprived part is anyway.
I posted on the other thread...and tried to update my siggie, but I have been quite emotional on it all.
Aww Ladybugs...you are in my thoughts & prayers.
If she's anything like her mama, she's got this...<3
Soar sorry about your grandma xx
Ladybugs I'm happy for you getting your daughter and praying she will be healthy and that your pregnancy isn't too stressful xx
Anyone else getting Braxton hicks ? I'm almost 23 weeks and definitely getting them soo annoying lol
Thanks girls..I will know in 15-17 weeks...boy that sounds so far away, but I do know that each day will go by so quickly. I want to enjoy this pregnancy, but I do feel robbed in several ways....I have to say that for the 4 weeks I had heard boy, I felt that GD was stealing my joy and now that I know I have my girl, fear of health issues is clouding my excitement. I will try to keep you all posted, but if I am not posting, please know that I will update as best I can. The next two days I will still be out of town, so it is harder to log on.
Just a few, most of them when vehicles suddenly stop. I have been keeping really well hydrated, so not getting too many this time around.Quote:
Originally Posted by grace03
I replied in the other thread but this is exactly what I was thinking too, it's not fair that things are taking away from your excitement and enjoyment of the pregnancy and getting your girl. XQuote:
Originally Posted by I Love Ladybugs
Ladybugs I replied in other thread too.
Grace, yes been having BH for ages!
Ladybugs-I know how scary percentages are! The dr's that have been taking care of my grandma love to give percentages! I find them mind numbing and very worrisome. Although I will say they give a 50/50 chance of her getting pneumonia or a blood clot and so far she hasn't had either and she has been in ICU since friday! So with that being said she is beating their 50/50 odds and she's 80 and in very poor health. So if she is doing it your sweet little baby girl has a far better shot at being perfect and healthy aside from the issues you already know of. So 97% of nothing being wrong with chromosomes sounds like fantastic odds! Although any chance of anything is super scary. We will add your little girl to our prayer list!
Congrats on the excellent news of a daughter! And keep us posted when you can! Hugs to you!!!!
Meeks & MsBlakely - So glad I'm not alone. I haven't really told anyone but DH how I've been feeling. So thank you!!
Soar - So glad your grandma is fighting! Praying!
Ladybugs - Replied in the other thread. Praying still!
Grace - I'm too early for BH, but will be interesting to see when they start, since this is my 4th baby, too.
Rainbow-so glad you feel safe to express your feelings here. It's really good you are writing it down and getting them out. They will definitely get worse if you don't so keep writing here if it helps you! I also think the thought of adding to the family can be really overwhelming. I'm trying at the moment to not think about that to much. I think the fact that I only have 2 hands but will have 3 children under 4 is really scary! So don't feel bad that you are thinking how will I do all this with 1 more! Plus that kind of makes you brilliant and a great mom that you are thinking ahead and planning how this will all work out once your number 4 gets here!
I like your thoughts on God's plan. I am really holding on to that as well. Remember the song you suggested on here? Well I heard it on the radio today while I was driving and I thought of you and myself and how we are just totally going to have to put this in God's hands bc otherwise we will go insane wondering why and what if. That song really made me feel good today. Thanks again for recommending it! I read a passage that said God doesn't ask us to understand him he asks us to trust him. Oh that is so much easier said than done but that also rings true on so many levels in my life right now! its So hard to trust, that is something I really need to work on! Hope you are getting some rest. I hope I hear that song on the radio again tomorrow! Heading to see my grandma in the morning and I need to hear it!
Soar, sorry about your Nan. I really hope she gets better soon.
Ladybugs i replied on the other thread. I agree it is so unfair that you are having some of your preggo joy. My sister in law had a baby late in life and her whole pregnancy was one test after the other. In the end her baby was fine and she wished she had never seen a doctor! I know they are more prepared when they know there may be complications but that doesn't make it any easier.
OK so the one more child question is tricky isn't it? My house guest asked if we were having another in the hope that this one would be good! He was only joking but a horrid doubt came into my mind - am i having another in the hope that it will be a lovely obedient girl? What if it is an outrageously naughty boy or a demon daughter? Ahhh! What have I done? LOL
No braxton Hicks for me but (TMI alert) very intense tightening of the whole belly when I have the big O.
Ladybug - Thinking of you during the stressful time but so happy for you that regardless of the outcome she is still going to be your daughter and an amazingly special one at that!!!! 97% odds are pretty amazing, but I know when you're in the situation it's hard to always think positively! Thinking of you and your sweet baby!
Grace - I'm getting Braxton hicks very often. I'd say the probably started a good two weeks ago if not more and I'm 23 weeks tomorrow. I got them with DS2 from about 20 weeks on too and was sure I'd have him early because of how often I had them but he came right at 39 weeks.
Thanks ladies for all the well wishes for Grandma. This morning they informed us she is being released from the hospital! We were all very surprised! Seems she is in no shape to leave but here we are. The next couple of days will give us a much better idea so we will see how it goes I guess. So frustrated with her doctors and all the "well we don't know what's wrong with her but she can't stay here." Comments. I want to shake these people with their 5 day hospital stay rules and ask if this was their loved one would they be ok with them being released? So annoying and so the roller coaster ride continues and so does my bad eating!
No Braxton hicks contractions over here so I guess that's really good!
As far as more children goes.....since we have had a ton of family come visit for Grandma I have gotten that question so many times this week. 3 kids huh? Had to try 1 more time? Trying for a girl huh? Oh hope this one is a girl. You really need a girl. Do you want this baby to be a girl? Maybe you can try again if its not? Oh man....I was smiling thru it all but my goodness they were all asking me the same question! My filter was about to blow, but instead I just ate a French fry! Haha! I think we will be fine with 3. It will be crazy but I really like it that way. My answer is always yes we are very excited and can't wait! 3 after all is the new 2! Haha! Normally they laugh and we move on.
Soar, great news about your grandma, will send more positive thoughts your way! You are amazing for keeping it all together :)
Side note, are any of you ladies eating lunch meat? My dr told me no during my 1st pregnancy because she has lost 2 babies to listeria with patients so I have skipped it with this one as well, but at a work meeting today all they had was lunch meat sandwiches...I ate plain bread and cheese :)
In Australia we are told no cold meats or lunch meats unless they are cooked in a meal for 3+mins at boiling temp. Mind you, 3rd time around I have made a few exceptions but only at places where I know its clean and hygienic. Technically you aren't supposed to, so you did the right thing.Quote:
Originally Posted by onthepond
I agree, 3 will be crazy but I do like it that way too. I get bored easily and like to be super busy, if i'm honest!!!Quote:
Originally Posted by Soar
So glad about your grandma! But its frustrating when the hospital has a different opinion to the family who know her so well. Hang in there.
ps. DH's family are the kings of comments like that! So frustrating. I've started saying really inappropriate things to shut them up, like "oh what will you do if its a boy"? "leave it at the hospital and try again". I laugh and it makes light of their stupidity. Then they usually follow up with a negative comment about 3 boys which I always answer with "I love the idea of 3 boys, there is something special about starting your own soccer/football/basketball team, and anyway at least then we dont have to buy anything new, since we already have boy coloured everything". That usually shuts them up. Its so annoying!
I don't understand why the idea of 3 shocks some people? From everyone I've heard it's not much different then 2. Once you hit 2 kids you already have to have a routine and schedule and the 3rd just falls in line with everyone else. I've also heard someone say that no matter what number of kids you have you always feel busy or overwhelmed at that number and it just becomes the normal. I read some blog where a lady said at 2 kids she was way in over her head and couldn't deal, then somehow they got pregnant with a third, same thing happened and she now is on #5 considering a sixth. Apparently it's the same feeling regardless of how many you have that becomes your limit.. until you move on a realize you can handle more! So all this gives me hope it's not that big of a deal. Plus, almost all families I know that are done having children all have 3 so it can't be that bad!
I have been told by those who have 5+ kids, that the hard work is the first two...the rest follow what you have taught them! I tried to answer on your other thread before you edited it....lol, I am not sure on the swaying myself. I do think that for me, doing exactly opposite of what I did for my boys did change things and in so doing "swayed", but maybe to a 60/40 split of which I got lucky. I had 4 weeks of thinking 3 boys and all....and realize that it is out of my hands no matter what I did anyway!!!Quote:
Originally Posted by MSBLAKELY
I am excited to be a mom of three....DS1 has been longing for a sibling other than his brother. He has such a sweetness about him when talking of his baby.....I miss him and DS2 being so far away from them.
Meeks...I had started to use those lines with the comments that I was getting....especially the one about three boys being amazing...I know it would have been so true for me!! I always comment in a positive light about my patients who have 3 or more boys...they are gorgeous families and most of the time better behave that the PP!!! :) There is only one exception to that....lol, and I just hope that I don't work the day they show up!!!!
AFM....last night here, will be on the road home tomorrow, already have the next appts lined up. I am trying my best to just breathe, focus and love on the kids the way they are!
The comments are driving me NUTS!!!
The second I posted I was pregnant on Facebook, the text messages, inbox messages & FB posts started.
"So....you were trying for a girl, huh?" - from a friend who has 3 girls, no boys. I wanted to say, so if you have another baby, does that mean you were going for the boy???
My main concern is HEALTHY & I've said it over & over....but the idiots still keep coming.
I think maybe I'm just extra sensitive today, but it is SO ANNOYING!!!
Sorry....y'all may resume your previous happy chats now....lol ;)
<3
I'm with you beadin, sometimes it bothers me more than other times though. Some of the first few comments I got on fb were "oh you need a bigger car", "there must be nothing to do down there in the country, you keep having babies", "hope its a girl" and "what are you going to do if its another boy". I mean SERIOUSLY, was it that hard to write "congrats!" if you had a judgy thought, keep it to yourself!!!! I started getting snippy and replied "we already have a 7 seater, so I don't imagine with 3 kids we will need to upgrade" etc.Quote:
Originally Posted by BeadinMom
I think your friend with 3 girls was probably speaking from her own experience, she probably had a third in the hope she'd get a boy. Which as we all know there is nothing wrong with, as long as you dont put others down for doing the same, or imply they wouldn't love an opposite too.
I am still fuming over my MIL's comments when I told her I was pg, "oh... can we have a girl this time then?" and 5 mins later "so how many weeks until we find out if its a boy or a girl?". Those just topped off everything else i've heard. Clearly she is going to be disappointed if I end up having a boy!!!
That drives me INSANE!!!
Somebody told me that today..."Can we have a girl this time?"
I said, "Sure, just put your order in at the drive-thru!! LOL!!"
And go AWAY!!!
I didn't have another baby as a gamble...I had another baby, because I wanted a BABY. As long as I have a healthy baby, I win.
Ugh. Sorry.
Thanks Meeks...you are always so sweet & you truly understand. Means a lot. XO