I'm Naming My Angel April

So I went in into the bedroom to see DH who was waking up from a nap and he told me that he had a dream about our baby yesterday. I began to cry instantly and I begged him to tell me. I knew it would be important because him and his family have premonitional dreams. He told me that in the dream he asked his cousin to help him find our baby's gravestone. Then he was walking with his cousin in the rain and looking for it, and then they found it together, the gravestone read April (and our last name)
And then he cried. (in the dream)

So he said to me, I think she was telling me she wanted to be named April.
I said "Well, she was conceived in April, and it's a pretty name so that's okay with me!"
and then I said: "I just KNEW she was a girl honey, and now it's been confirmed."

Then we both cried, well he tried to hide it, and I just sobbed.
I just miss her SO much, I want her back in my tummy! :sadflwr:

Attachment 2425

What a sad but beautiful story! Hugs!

I'm so sorry, Butterfly. **hugs** Your angel has a lovely name.

this made me cry! what a beautiful name for a beautiful angel! i'm so sorry for what you've been through!

Oh Butterfly I just started sobbing, i'm so sorry for your loss

Butterfly, sad but sweet story.

So sorry about your April...

You ladies made me cry again, you are all SO sweet! I love this place!!! :)

Beautiful name for a beautiful angel :HH:

That's a sweet story....hope you guys are doing ok. xoxo

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by LolaInLove

That's a sweet story....hope you guys are doing ok. xoxo

---

DH is sad and he tears up every time I do, but then again he's told me that he's not trying to get me pregnant again, so it won't be easy, but it will be worth it when I win in the end again! I wish he would just accept it and help me conceive again because I just want to be pregnant again! But, he is in fact taking supplements again so THAT is good, and he's decided to cut back on drinking coke as well! I took an opk last night and the line is coming back, so perhaps in a week or less I will get a + OPK! FX!

Well, sweetie, that is nice that he is emotional about it right along with you. My DH had a hard time with our 5wk loss and a harder time with the 10wk one, and his way of dealing was pretty much just shoving it down the emotional hatch and just being sweet to me. All you guys can do is try to be as healthy as possible and get back on the ttc train when you are ready. Just know that it was nothing to do with anything you did- you probably know this, but something like half of all conceptions end in early m/c because of chromosomal abnormality. It is so common, and does not in any way mean you will not have a healthy one right away. I got pg with DD1 a couple of weeks after a 5wk loss back in the day, and millions of other ladies have done just the same. Take good care of yourself and each other, though! Lots of love and sweetness can totally heal you!

I am so sorry for your loss Butterfly. I too have an angel that came and left before we could meet. My little angel will forever hold a piece of my heart wherever that may be. I don't think they mean to leave us with pain but touch us with love.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by LolaInLove

Well, sweetie, that is nice that he is emotional about it right along with you. My DH had a hard time with our 5wk loss and a harder time with the 10wk one, and his way of dealing was pretty much just shoving it down the emotional hatch and just being sweet to me. All you guys can do is try to be as healthy as possible and get back on the ttc train when you are ready. Just know that it was nothing to do with anything you did- you probably know this, but something like half of all conceptions end in early m/c because of chromosomal abnormality. It is so common, and does not in any way mean you will not have a healthy one right away. I got pg with DD1 a couple of weeks after a 5wk loss back in the day, and millions of other ladies have done just the same. Take good care of yourself and each other, though! Lots of love and sweetness can totally heal you!

---

Thank you Lola, and I am so VERY sorry for your losses as well!!!! :broken: :sadflwr::sadflwr:
Unfortunately this is a cause of my own body or it's coincidence. When I went to get my hcg checked at the clinic the following Monday my TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) came back as 20.0 something.. extremely high..meaning my stimulating hormone was SCREAMING at my thyroid to produce more. That means my thyroid was producing little to no thyroid stimulation and no estrogen because my thyroid issue is linked to estrogen imbalance.
then yesterday I found out that Vitex is a natural medicine for hypothyroidism.. so it gave my body just enough thyroid hormone to conceive.. and then when I stopped taking it.. it crashed.
I am going to see a endocrinologist hopefully VERY soon so this does not happen again. It's a long process though it seems.. physician's referral and medical records etc.
I will update very soon.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Cinss

I am so sorry for your loss Butterfly. I too have an angel that came and left before we could meet. My little angel will forever hold a piece of my heart wherever that may be. I don't think they mean to leave us with pain but touch us with love.

---

Thank you Cinss, I am very sorry for your loss too! :broken: :sadflwr:
I really appreciate the support and you put it very sweetly!

I'm so sorry Butterfly. That is heartbreaking. :(

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Hobbermittens

I'm so sorry Butterfly. That is heartbreaking. :(

---

Thank you Hobber. I took a HPT tonight just for the hell of it, and there's a faded out line (on Vitex time thread). Just SUCKS. I want to return to normal to conceive again :(

Sending you big big healing hugs and April is a beatiful name xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by TTC5

Sending you big big healing hugs and April is a beatiful name xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

---

Thank you TTC5 sweetie! :)

Im so so sorry :hugs: for your loss. RIP sweet baby April:HH:.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Myloves

Im so so sorry :hugs: for your loss. RIP sweet baby April:HH:.

---

Thank you for your support, Myloves! :)

:( I'm sorry Butterfly. It really helped me to name my baby too so I hope it bring you some peace of mind. :heart:

KFX that DH gets on board with the program!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

:( I'm sorry Butterfly. It really helped me to name my baby too so I hope it bring you some peace of mind. :heart:

KFX that DH gets on board with the program!

---

Thank you Atomic! I think he will hehe ;) He's taking his supps at least.

I'm so sorry for your loss, Butterfly. What a lovely name you chose xx

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Foxy

I'm so sorry for your loss, Butterfly. What a lovely name you chose xx

---

Thank you so much Foxy! :)

I'm so sorry Butterfly. I hope you can get some closure...HUGS.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by The Anchor

I'm so sorry Butterfly. I hope you can get some closure...HUGS.

---

Thank you Anchor sweetie! I am pregnant again, and I conceived before AF returned after my loss! :)
I'm SO happy. I posted in my other threads.

OMG that's incredible! CONGRATS! I'm looking for your other posts :)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by The Anchor

OMG that's incredible! CONGRATS! I'm looking for your other posts :)

---

Just go to my name and click it.. then go to profile, and then all "latest started threads". :)