Just got BFP...gender dissapointment already?!

A little background...I've been a lurker here for awhile and started swaying girl late summer. I didn't follow it very strictly and think I already tend to follow a girl friendly diet (no red meat, no extra salt, etc) I didn't cut caffeine, but drank lots of peppermint tea and crystal light. Used sylk a few attempts and only supplements I took were Vitex w/B6 & Maca (had issues with long cycles), magnesium, and cranberry around O date. We ended up BD'ing day 3, 2, 1 leading up to ovulation. I believe we conceived in a Capricorn new moon phase (oct 19th):pinksperm: :fx: :pinksperm:

I got my BFP on Halloween!!

The reason I am posting on here is because I feel I'm already having some gender disappointment already. I have a feeling this baby is a boy, although we did somewhat sway girl. Although a part of me feels it's just a coping mechanism as I've always felt my DH and I would have a little girl as our first. To make it more complicated, our good friends are also pregnant and due a few weeks before me. I can't stop obsessing--what if they have a girl? Their diet appears to be very boy friendly. I know I should stop obsessing and that it's still super early, and that gut instincts can also be wrong. I just feel horrible that I'm not overly excited because I'm nervous I'm having a boy. With all this said, I am grateful to God that we were blessed with a little one to love no matter the gender and will love this baby all the same regardless...I just had always hoped and dreamed to have a little girl.

I guess my question is have any of you ladies also feel like your subconscious is preparing you for the opposite gender you had hoped for?? Thanks so so much for listening and happy to finally be posting!!

Congrats on your BFP!

I was convinced that I was pg with a girl, but I'm blessed with a boy.

Well, I didn't with my DS2. I was convinced up until 15 weeks that I was having a girl - after 15 weeks I just knew it was a boy. I did have my darker moments where I was tearful it wasn't the girl I had hoped for and I did have some issues dealing with it because OH didn't want anymore children and said he would go for the snip.

At my 20wk scan they couldn't really tell if it was a boy or a girl - he didn't want to cooperate. But as soon as they started scanning the thought "oh.. its another boy!" popped into my head and I had to pull myself together a bit. I have to admit I did think "please be a girl please be a girl..!". When they couldn't really tell I tried to convince myself it was a girl, but deep down I knew it was a boy.

When he was born it took some time before I felt happy. With DS1 I was overwhelmed with happiness, with DS2 it took an hour or so - but in all honesty I'm convinced it was because i was high as a kite on entonox! Once the entonox wore of I loved him so much.

This time though.. I'm mentally preparing myself for another boy! I'm telling myself I will sway, but its probably going to be another boy. My OH says the same. If it is a boy, then I'm prepared because I knew anyway, if its a girl then it will be the loveliest surprise in a long time. I don't know if its the way forward, but I would hate for my pregnancy to be ruined by the disappointment. Undoubtedly I will sting again if it IS a boy, but hopefully it will be a quick or occasional jab and not an overwhelming sadness.

I hope you get your wish and the best of luck with your journey to motherhood!

I wouldn't worry too much about diet. I swayed hard for a boy twice and followed the diet for a boy (in addition to all the other stuff we did) and I've ended up with girls twice.

Its really tough not knowing the sex through the beginning of pregnancy, your mind will carry you here there and everywhere. Just try to enjoy it, you may be carrying your littel girl, if you eventually find out it is another son, you can deal with the emotions then, for now just try to relax and not worry about what might or might not be.

Your not out yet, I have 2 boys and now 33 weeks pregnant with a girl.. I didn't do any swaying or girl friendly diets etc all 3 of my children were conceived bang on ovulation day! I've always believed it's a 50/50 chance of either sex occouring! Hope you get your desired gender good luck x

Ugh, I feel your pain. DH and I were planning on swaying next year and BAM! Got a *very* unexpected BFP back in September and am now convinced 100% that this baby is a boy (mainly due to lifestyle). I don't have any words of wisdom, but I can relate to your feelings.

Thank you everyone for your words of wisdom! And congrats to everyone expecting little ones of your own! I think my mind is playing tricks on me as the past few days I'm feeling this is a pink bump. I'll find out soon enough!!

@bellavita are you on the may thread? fx for you!!

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Originally Posted by junebug88

@bellavita are you on the may thread? fx for you!!

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Thanks! I've popped in over there, but haven't posted much. I'll need to get the ball rolling on that, ha!

Don't count yourself out yet...there are a couple of threads on here about "gut feelings", and lots of people are wrong! Personally, I KNEW that DD was a boy, didn't believe the U/S tech, and paid for a private U/S. For DS I KNEW boy...so I'm only 50/50 on gut feelings.

I have kinda been playing mind games with myself. We did some swaying stuff, but nothing hard-core. I have two sons and we don't plan on this being our last baby, so I wasn't too worked up about the gender. When I first got my BFP...I thought "It's a boy" and held onto that thought, strongly. But in the past two weeks (10-12 weeks along) I have been entertaining "what if it is a girl?" I keep reverting back to refusing it is a girl. I feel like I need to prepare myself for my third son. And I don't know if the "it's a boy" thoughts are protective because I refuse to get my hopes up. Or if they are really an intuition that I am expecting a son. There are days where I know it's a boy in there. And days where I feel it could be a girl. I don't think the intuition can be trusted when there are other factors going on. I never had super-strong intuition with my boys anyway, so I don't think I have it this time either..just a protective feeling for my own self-preservation. I just keep picturing my child in my head, both as a boy and as a girl and remembering that when they are here, I won't care a bit. :)