Happy & Sad at the same time - BFP

Hi Ladies,
Well, I am having really mixed feelings today and its really silly!
I have 2x DS and have been on here for the last few months religiously planning for my sway attempt for third and final DC. I started the diet early Jan and was planning to ttc in March. I haev been eagerly waiting for AF so I can start my supps (all ready to go) and hubby on board with diet and LR too! I have also been having some other weird body issues too, so whilst buying my CBFM sticks and fibre last night I also picked up some pregnancy test in prep. Thought I would take one just as a process of illiminiation and Atomic also advises before supps. Well, I couldn't believe my surprise when it was a BFP!! We have dtd so little I can trace it exactly to when (NY Eve, lol!!), and TMI alert (it was a slightly late pull out), which I then jumped and dumped and wiped as I didn't want to get preggo that month.
On one hand I am chuffed as it was so easy and now I dont have to go through the whole trying and testing and AF. BUT i also feel really gutted that I didn't get to do anything from my sway plan. This is def our last baby and although I know I will love whatever children I have (of course), I really wanted to give myself half a chance at a girl.
I have such a boy diet and especially over the xmas period, hubby and I were complete pigs, lol!!
I am then battling with myself for being so selfish and being a bit disappointed that I pregnant. I should feel really happy and lucky! I guess in a way its good I deal with any potential GD now. This is my last pregnancy and I just wanted to enjoy ebery mintue knowing that I had done what I could to sway my chances, no matter the results. Just feel Im not in with a chance now. I just feel like a complete boy Mum and can't imagine myself with a girl. No girls on hubby's side and I really wanted to try and throw the girl in there!!
I am still in shock!

Hello, I went through the exact same thing at Xmas when I got a surprise bfp. I had been on LE and supplements but not as long I'd have liked. Like u I was happy with my bfp but also slightly sad that I didn't get to complete my sway. On the bright side, i git my bfp just before xmas so i got to totally pig out! I guess what's meant to be is meant to be. Fingers crossed ur bean is pink :) xx

Congrats on the bfp, this little bub is obviously meant to be part of your family :) it is absolutely reasonable to feel the way you do, don't beat yourself up. This feeling will all be forgotten when you have your beautiful baby in your arms x

Thank you both ladies. I have just realised that I was on antibiotics days after conception too, which sways boy. Big sigh! You're absolutely right, that this little bean is meant to be part of the family. I had slight GD with DS2 and feel so guilty about it now coz he is just wonderful! I have no doubt that any GD will be gone when baby arrives. Nothing as amazing as having that tiny bundle in your arms. Awww. x

It sounds like you were ill when you conceived as you said you were on anticbiotics - i dont think the antibiotics would take effect on gender if you were taking them after conception but I do think being sick sways pink! I fell pregnant last September by complete surprise. We werent sure we were going to have another baby but if we were we would wait till this year and I was planning on doing a mild sway for a girl. This baby was conceived when I was sick with the flu and lo and behold it is a girl!! My DH only has boy cousins so thought for sure this LO would be boy - I hope that gives you a little glimmer for pink, Congratulations on your bfp, this baby is meant to be in your life x

OMG the exact same thing happened to me!! I am still in shock and don't know what to think. So scared of another boy. We didn't even want to sway because I so badly only wanted one more girl (or two :happy: ), no more boys. My boys are more than a handful, and I feel like I just cannot go through another boy-baby-phase. It was too hard. We were planning to go HT in fall. And now.. I feel so screwed, and at the same time kind of happy that it was so easy to fall pregnant. That has never happened to me with the boys. I also "jumped and dumped", and I guess that is the only hope I am having for getting a girl after all. But all in all, this hope and chance is so slim. I am already preparing for GD. It will be huge this time, I know that. I am trying to prepare, but still can't figure out a way how 3 boys (in Germany - I still think that is a huge difference from raising boys in child-friendly countries) can be a positive thing for me.
I am sorry I am not helping at all. Just wanted to tell you I am in the very same position as you are. And I am crossing my fingers for you for a girl!
Somehow, it is all going to be alright. Hope you are having a happy and healthy pregnancy and wishing you the best of luck :luck:

Just want to say a huge thank you to all you ladies. You are all so supportive and I am so so grateful. My DH knows I am a little gutted, but he has his 'boys' so struggles to really get it. I am so thankful for this website and just knowing there are other people out there in the same position is a huge weight off.
Thank you so much : )
x

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I hope you have a pink bean in there, she still could be! :cheer:

antibiotics do not sway after ovulation

I am in the exact same position you are and it happened almost the exact same way only on (right after Thanksgiving) on Nov 30/Dec 1st and yours was right after Christmas Dec 31st. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I wanted so badly to sway for a girl as this will probably be our last baby. I felt very guilty at first for not wanting the BFP because there are so many couples in this world that can't have any kids on their own. I did the same thing you did... jump and dump quick!! I know this baby is going to be a boy so I am prepared for that. I just figure everything happens for a reason and I know once he is born I will fall in love with him however, my GD will still be there crushing me. I HATE GD!! Lets hope we get the little girls we have been longing for!!

Yeah the antibiotics do t factor for you so you very well could have a pink bean! Congrats on the bfp and like the others said, baby truly was meant to be :-)