Just wondering. :) Thanks.
Printable View
Just wondering. :) Thanks.
I'm not positive yet, but I might be!
I have 1 girl, but I'm having my 4th boy. How are you doing?
I will know in 2 an 1/2 weeks if I am
In case it helps any of you to hear, 4 boys was my dream family! I think it sounds fabulous. :)
I'm okay. I'm very glad he is healthy, and I go back and forth between being excited about a new little man and being angry and jealous and just plain frustrated. I'm finding it very hard to see families that have 2 or 3 boys and then a girl. Seeing families like that used to make me hopeful, but now that I know I am having boy #4, I am just feeling jealous. I hate feeling that way. I have been thinking about trying again, but I never pictured myself with 5 kids. I always wanted 4. So when we tried for this baby, while I did sway, I knew I would rather have a baby boy than no 4th baby at all. That would be different next time, it would be the first time I was only doing it to try to get a girl. And I would probably just have another boy. :(Quote:
Originally Posted by ThreeMenAndALAdy
I am having my fourth boy. I know exactly how you feel. It has been really hard for me to be excited about having a baby since I found out and I am REALLY struggling to think of a name because I just don't even want to pick a boy name. We were never going to have 4 kids and then decided to try one more time. I thought for sure we would have a girl this time because no one has 4 boys that's just crazy and here I am having another boy. Honestly I would not have had another if I knew it was going to be a boy and I feel guilty about that. I'm sure once he is here it won't matter o much but I struggle with it everyday.
Big hugs to you both Jennaesue and mommyof3boys.
well I have 3 boys so could be having my fourth. won't know till birth:)
The 4th boy is a big pill to swallow...I have swallowed it and not easily, I will admit. (I"m not due when you are but I saw this post)
Fast forward 3 years...I am very proud to have 4 boys. I will post their picture if you think it may help in some way? They are so darn cute and there is something very special about seeing 4 brothers all together.
No they don't all get along, so I'm defo not going to go all into the wonderful brotherly bond ;) Still waiting on that one!! LOL..it is there though...but hopefully they are learning how to compromise or something....LOL (can you tell we are on spring break right now?!?)
My DS4 is just a wonderful human being and because he has brought so much joy and happiness (I honestly cannot think of ONE negative for having him), I really wanted a fifth child. I kind of have my heart set on a 5th boy because there are things I want to experience again before my uterus goes into permanent retirement. I also find it really satisfying to watch my youngest boy look up to his older brothers and want to learn from them (boy stuff LOL).
((hugs)) I know you go into this with alot of hope and what-ifs and it all comes crashing down with one ultrasound. It will be ok. Right now, he is learning the sound of your voice and bonding to you already and when he comes out and you see his sweet face and his little eyes, you will know he was meant to be right in your arms and if he is anything like my 4th boy, he will be so catered to and spoiled and loved and cherished that you will thinlk WOW 4th boys are so lucky! They never have to wonder about love. :)
I am on my third but had the same plan as you. Only 4 kids. I get a feeling I will have 4 boys and it makes me feel a little scared but I want 4 no matter what the sex, that fifth one would just be trying for a girl and I don't think that is fair or right. We don't always get what we want in life and honestly I never ever thought I wouldn't not have a girl you know? I mean what are the odds of all four being boys? Apparently high.... Is a bitter pill to swallow but like all other disappointments in life we move on and find a way to live in the happiest way possible. There will always be moments of what ifs and jealousy perhaps but living thinking of what you are missing, makes you miss what you already have so it's important to always appreciate what we have. This is the way I try to look at it anyhow.... My heart will always hold a spot for a daughter but if it's never filled I refuse to let it consume me and eat away at my other parts of my heart. Maybe after your fourth is born you will be able to picture a 5th and want another for more than just trying for a girl reasons.... You never know :-)
Could well be ;-s 3&4!
Im not pregnant yet, but I have 4 boys (3 from a previous and 1 with my husband) and hoping my 5th and his 2nd will be a lil girl cuz God knows I need some pink in ny life. Lol..
I have 4 boys. I was really upset with I found out DS4 was a boy. I would not change him for the world. He is full of energy and life. He is a Momma's boy. Even though he did tell me he wanted to go to preschool cause he did not want to be my shopping buddy anymore :( I never saw myself with 5 children the most was 4. After awhile I decided to go for the 5th. My first son is not my husbands. I am still in shock that it is a girl. I really thought I was going to have my 5th son.
Thanks for your responses, everyone. Harleyquinn and Rosie, your posts really made me feel better. Thanks so much. I love this site. I can't really express these feelings to anyone IRL, my close friends are all going through their own hard times right now, and the last thing they want to hear is me whining about a healthy baby who isn't the "right" gender.
I know I'll be okay; I remember how upset I was after finding out #3 was a boy, and yet I love that kid so much and would walk over hot coals and eat glass for him, lol. So I know I will feel that way about ds4, also. It is just taking some time for me to process the whole never having a daughter thing. I think I need to tell myself that it could happen, but not to focus on it completely, and to spend as much time and energy focusing on my boys as possible.
You are welcome, I love this site too. It's nice to be able to express our real feelings without being judged. Big hugs to you and all!
I will know for sure in a week and 1/2. Have some indications of a dd on the way, but I am usually the odd man out. Having the hope of a dd and then having it taken is awful. I completely relate to what you feel and are going through. It is a strange blend of happy and sad, and not feeling free to talk about it makes it even harder because the guilt feelings creep in.
((hugs)) jennaesue.
I am ALWAYS available to point out the awesomeness of having four boys! I am so in love with my fellows, that it isn't hard for me to be very positive about the gender thing. Its actually very freeing to finally let go of it all and feel a sense of peace and contentment, I know you will get there.
My baby is due in October and I am just splitting a gut to meet it!! I don't care what it is...just get heeeerrrrrre, I am so impatient to hold you baby!! :)
Hi Jennasue,
Well I know exactly how you feel of course. After you I got my confirmation our third boy was on its way. I must admit I am still totally gutted and struggling to deal with it. I have actually contacted a lady here a psychologist just to talk things through as I really don't want to end up a bitter jealous old lady who has some psycho tendencies like collecting dolls or painting everything in pink! Or worse having a problem with any female grand children I might get (I reckon that was my grandmother's problem with myself and my sister...she hated us and loved my two brothers!). I really honestly thought....NO WAY will I be the one that ends up with all boys. I am so not a boy mom and loves clothes and dressing up and all things girlie. I also thought I did a good sway but no reading new developments from the collection of successful and unsuccessful sways I see I did a lot of things wrong...and I am beating myself up about that. I know I should probably just stop reading all that. Plus I wish I tried clomid! This has been a really tough pregnancy and hats off to all your ladies or your fourth or fifth pregnancy! I really don't think I can do a fourth plus the prospect of a fourth boy is just too much for me to handle. I am already dealing with the stupid comments and the "oh I am so sorry faces" from everyone here about a third one on the way. My two closest friends are due the same time and both are having girls. So while I am sure I will be coming around to the idea of the third boy the jealousy will be back with a vengeance when I see them with their little girls. God I would love to not feel this way....it's horrible. And this third guy never asked to be born...I always have to try and keep that in mind.
I am sure your 4th will be your little prince Jennasue and he will give you lots of love and shower you in affection...at least that is what I am hoping my third will do for me. Hang in there....we only have just over three months to go. Thinking of you and mommyof3boys too of course....we were the few unlucky ones in a group!
I hope it's appropriate for me to post here.
I wanted to say, I think having 4 boys is awesome. I think that there is something freeing in having a lot of one gender - rather than having to be "the boy" and "the girl" they can be "the artist", "the athlete", "the smart one", "the gamer" etc. I feel like it removes some of the pressure of the gender stereotypes, which IMO I feel like are currently much tougher on boys than on girls these days.
I also read a book in favor of same-sex education where they talked about the cultures at some all-boy military schools, and the boys ended up being a lot more nurturing of one another. It was like in the absence of girls, they were more able to step forward and fulfill the nurturing roles that in a co-ed situation would have been derided as "girly" and I think the same thing can happen in a family setting as well. My older boys do dishes, babysit, cook etc etc etc in addition to mowing the lawn and washing the car, because there ARE no girls to do it. I've seen several families where the girls do girl stuff and the boys do boy stuff not because the parents set out to enforce sexist role models haha but more because the girls/boys kinda gravitated towards certain things and the parents just went with it, KWIM? I know rwo big all girl families and the same is true for them, the girls are more apt to do "boy stuff".
I'm having my fourth boy. There is a 10 yr age gap between #2 so I think that has helped a bit. Either way, I wanted a sibling close in age to son #3. I feel the same way about a 5th child, I would only be doing it for a girl, and not because I genuinely want another child. We are going with an IUD after I have this one and I guess we'll see what the future holds.
Actually, the closer I get to my due date, and the more times I say 4 boys out loud, the more I kind of like it! There is something special about 4 in a row of one gender. I grew up without a father or any strong male influence in my life. I like to think that now I'm surrounding myself with males that will always be the most important relationships I have.
Great post atomic, thank you!
We're also expecting our 4th boy. I must say that after suffering crushing GD my last 2 pregnancies I was pleasantly surprised by how excited I am to have this little guy on the way. Before we knew gender I was looking through some of DS3's preemie/newborn clothes and sort of felt sad at the thought of not being able to use some of those cute outfits again. Certainly I would have been thrilled to have added a little pink to the family but I'm not disappointed for more blue. I've been a "boy mom" for 10 years now and have loved it, now I am still a boy mom but with an extra bonus baby!
DS4 is due in October. DS1 is 8, DS2 is 5 and DS3 is 3.
I'm still trying to be at peace with #4's gender. I've only known for 3 days now and I know it'll take time. I have a feeling as soon as I look at little Duncan (DS4) I will fall in love with him just as hard as I did with his big brothers.
It has taken me awhile to come to terms with 4 boys as well. I cried for about 2 days straight and pretty frequently during the entire week following, but now I am glad I know because I would have been so upset when he was born if I hadn't had this time to prepare myself mentally. I did decide to redo our bedroom the way I have always wanted it as a way of therapy and I think that doing that for myself has really helped.Quote:
Originally Posted by xokatietatie
Im not sure but I could be having my 4th boy too - we will find out at birth. 4 boys is my dream family but we tried for a girl as hubby is desperate for a daughter so one of us will be happy no matter what the outcome. I love seeing pics of families
with 4 boys i think its really special
We're due to have our third boy in August and I've just about adjusted to it after what I thought was a good sway. I didn't do Clomid though as mentioned above so maybe I needed it; we certainly seem to be fertile so probably should have done something more dramatic. It's hard not to look back and second guess yourself. We have no idea what to do next time (we've always wanted 4 or 5 kids) as I'm not sure I could go through another failed sway but we're not sure we could afford travelling to the States and paying for IVF. Hard not to feel guilty about thinking of it when this little one is still to arrive!
weezie, dont feel quilty. planning my 4th baby really helped me come to terms with my gd when i was pg with ds3.
Quote:
Originally Posted by weeziewoozles
Thanks! Can i ask what are your HT plans?Quote:
Originally Posted by deaks66
Yes, no probs. We are heading to hrc in august. Making a 2 week family holiday out of it. DS3 is only 8 months at the moment but i didnt want to wait another full year before we tried HT. I had pretty bad gd with ds2 and 3 (worse with ds3) but once he was here... oh my goodness, wouldnt swop him for anything. Still feel like it will eat away at me if it dont try HT though.Quote:
Originally Posted by weeziewoozles
Wow! Good luck! We need to seriously think about the finances cos I think I have to try it too!Quote:
Originally Posted by deaks66
Good luck:)Quote:
Originally Posted by deaks66