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Look at us go! Woohoo! I hope all of you ladies are doing well. I have been hiding again since our ultrasound last week when we found out I have complete placenta previa. I swear I just can't catch a break and I know I shouldn't complain but I am just so scared now. I start acupuncture 2 times a week and go back at 27 weeks for a recheck. Please keep saying prayers that this thing moves for us, it would mean so much to me. We lost our last baby and I am just so, so scared of what could happen now. Thanks so much!!!!!
Side note to the earlier conversation - our DD just turned 2 and we definitely aren't hiding from her yet when showering, changing, etc though she does know some things like vagina and boobs. HA. Gracefully hoping she doesn't start asking about daddy - that would kill him!!
Hi girls, we're very open with our kids too. We're not nudists or anything but if I need clothing from the other side of the house it's not unusual for me to do a bare-bum-dash to find it! :-)
My boys are always following me or DH to the toilet or shower so they've seen it all!
I'm in Australia and during our hot summers, kids are always naked in the backyard under the sprinkler!
My 4.5yo DS1 knows all the basic parts of his body and girls bodies and he's more interested in farts, fart jokes, pretend fart noises, smelly bums, etc. Now THAT is driving me crazy!!
Lol am3a.
I am in Aus too and basically it seems we have a similar philosophy to most of you ladies. I was raised in a very open household where I saw mum and dad shower and do the bare bum dash for clothes, and although nothing was ever flaunted, I certainly saw everything often, and it was treated as totally normal. I was told that private parts are private and that seeing eachother is only normal if you are at home in our household, in the shower etc. It was always drummed into me that you dont show these things to other extended family members or anyone else, that private parts are private but nothing to be ashamed of. Any questions I had were answered honestly, and at age 6 I remember having that 'where I come from' book and a few other anatomy books, things were always factual and scientific in our house, and by answering my many, many questions at an age appropriate level, I didnt feel the need to ask other people, and I think we may have had a conversation about what is a home question and what is a social or public setting question. Can you tell my mum is a teacher? hehe
I plan to raise my kids the same way, and ds1 is just like me, extremely observant, questioning and likes to explore ideas until he is satisfied he understands. If I dont explain things at home, he will and does ask other people, at kinder or daycare (he's 4), so I tend to try and be as honest as possible with everything he asks, while coating it in age appropriate language and length of description, so he can actually understand. I ease in on detail. He has seen me in the shower, getting dressed, doing the naked run for clothes etc. He knows he is allowed to look at my pregnant tummy if he asks at home but is aware he cant just pull my top up in public and take a look, so I think this is the way we tackled what's socially acceptable. We talk about having to ask to see mummy's tummy and that its something private that we only do at home, not when other people are around (dont need him flashing my stretch marks to the world!!!). Same goes for boobs etc. I try to tell him the real words for things, even if they are grown up, but also tell him that some people find those words rude, so we dont talk about them much unless asking a question. He is aware that sware words are rude so kind of understands this. I try to answer his questions. He has asked me why babies drink from boobies, if they can drink from daddies nipples, why not, how babies come out etc. That last one I gave a 4 year old answer, which was "Babies come out of mummy at the hospital, the doctor helps, and daddy is there too". He doesnt need to know much more right now, but perhaps after baby arrives when hes 5 I might tell him more. I dont want to scare him or make him think his sister is going to hurt mummy. So we kind of straddle the line between telling it like it is, and being age appropriate.
I am lucky we always had this approach because I will never forget the day ds1 as a 3 year old, got up to wee in the morning, dh was at work, I put him on the toilet and he saw his doodle was hard, and LOST. HIS. MIND. He screamed, tried to lean back away from it, said "mummy mummy, its big, help, its broken, its DYING". bahahahahaha. I was thinking OMG I really thought dh would be fielding this situation. I spoke really calmly and made as if it was nothing, and said "Its ok, its ok, its normal, daddy's does that too (at which point he stopped screaming), just lean forward and do a wee, it will go back to normal". He did, and it worked (whew, wasnt actually sure if that would work), and I just said this happens to older boys, when they sleep, its normal, just do a wee and it goes away. Later I'll make sure dh explains more, when the time is right, but for now he is ok with that much info.
Hope that helps. I know everyone is different but dont think its ever too late to change your approach if one thing isnt working.
hahaha meeks32 that's awesome!... I had a similar experience my eldest when he first had an erection he was the same mummy make it go away! I said well don't touch it and think of something else! I tried really hard not to laugh... and my second said mummy I can't do it! I said what love? I can't do what Jacobs doing! I look over and he's pulling back his foreskin... Oh dear...ummm Dad! help! dad says don't look at me I'm not doing it! So I was it... :/
My DS1 got erections since he was a newborn, that was quite a surprise to me!! He only started to notice in his twos as it would hurt him when wearing a nappy and we would have to set it free so it could go down. And then when wearing pants too, particularly when needing a wee. I always say either have a wee, or if that's not cause 'don't touch it'. When he is pant free he finds his willy quite interesting, probably because its hidden away most of the time.
We have actually never had the 'its private, for home (or summer baked fun times with buddies)' chat yet but so far (he is coming to to three and a half) he's shown no indication of being interested in talking about it or showing it in public. I really think because we've always been so normal about it he doesn't think of it as any different
Oooops press send before I'd finished...
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To say his elbow. I'm sure that will change and we will deal with it accordingly.
On another note, I've woken up so uncomfortable and pressured in my chest etc... Think the baby is having a play at being breach today, not fun!!
We're definitely very similar to the way the rest of you have all mentioned - any questions DS has he'll ask us and we never make it a big deal - always just age appropriate answers. The only thing different I have done was stop changing in front on him when he was 3ish because he would always come in to watch and quite honestly I just felt awkward sometimes. Half the time he's playing in another room when I change, and I shower in the evenings so there isn't really even the opportunity to 'see me'. Him and his brother are always showering or bathing together with my DH and it's nothing to them. We were actually informed yesterday once my husband went to the school to talk to them - they were dealing with the situation really weird and I just was over it so he went instead - that the teacher told him a girl started the whole thing by talking to him about privates and then lifting her shirt. Luckily we've never had an issue with him going around flashing his junk (we've also had the privates are private talk) but obviously this little girl sparked an interest this week!
Hope everyone is feeling well. I swear I'm way bigger than I was at 31 weeks the last two times but DH doesn't think so. I didn't really take pictures either so I can't compare. I sure feel like I'm completely full term though and there's still 9 weeks to go!!
I really think at that age it's so common for them to be interested, it's not even a big deal that they might ask eachother or flash eachother, sounds like the other parents are making a mountain out of a molehill here, this is really normal and just needs to be a chance for teachers and both parents to have a chat about what's ok in public and what's not. Nothing more. You are doing all the right things. Maybe shower with him once or twice a week to make it less interesting or special for him? Like dh does?
I am also WAY bigger this time, my pics don't look that much bigger because I started at about 5-6kg lower than previous pregnancies but I have gained more by 22 weeks than I did last time(s) and feel huge! People are making rude comments too which is frustrating when I am already self conscious!
That's horrible - I don't understand why anyone makes any comment about being bigger or whatever! I feel like this will be my heaviest pregnancy too. I feel like after the LE my body is no holding onto way more fat worrying it's going to get starved again lol! Hoping it all falls off right after baby, but that's probably wishful thinking! Maybe for you (and potentially me....) the OWT about gaining more weight with girls is true!Quote:
Originally Posted by meeks32
I also feel soooooo much bigger with this baby! I have already gained 30lbs and I am only 26 weeks! Eck! I am also conveniently blaming the weight gain on the LE diet! :-) I am not eating anymore than I did with the boys but maybe my body is just keeping it all on just in case? Well that's what my story is and I'm sticking to it! At the end of the day my thought is there is plenty of time to loose the weight after this baby. Plus food tastes so much better when your pregnant don't you think?
Hi ladies, just wondering if any of your pregnancies have been dramatically different in terms of movement?
I am 27w5d and my baby is so mild! My 2 boys were FULL ON! This morning I had my glucose test and the baby moved once during the hour after the drink (I was sitting waiting to have my blood test). I remember my boys going nuts after that drink!
I'm worried but baby moves often enough not to go driving like a crazy lady straight to emergency! ;-)
Am3a if movements are decreased for you then see your midwife. If this is normal for your baby then you probably don't need to worry.
This baby definitely has quiet days... And then has more active days. Actually I had a bit of a hiccup scare too... Excessive hiccuping it seems can be the result of cord compression. Regular hiccuping is good though and is a good indication they are practice breathing. Ultimately if you are worried then talk to someone. Best not to take any chances. Incidentally the hiccups day baby was a bit quiet, next day sooooo active!
I've definitely gained more so far (15 lbs at 20 weeks), but I still weigh less than I did with my first 3 boys at this stage of pregnancy. BUT, I was about 9-10 lbs. less than my normal pre-pg weight with this one...so I don't really look different. I am very lucky to lose the weight pretty quickly after pregnancy, I think mainly due to BF, but also I have Hashimoto's thyroiditis that tends to flare up after giving birth. We'll see how it goes this time! I have no intention of losing down to what I was before this pregnancy, so basically, if I gain 35, I will only lose 25. I was unhealthy! Anyway, you ladies are all right...you have time to lose the weight!! And we all will!
As far as movement goes...I am feeling much less this pregnancy, too. I have been somewhat worried, but trying not to dwell on it too much. I'm almost 21 weeks, and was feeling a TON with the first ones at this point. Less so with DS2 because of anterior placenta, but I'm pretty sure he was more active than this one. Of course, I have anterior placenta this time, too...so I think that's the main reason I'm not feeling as much. BUT, I have permanently reduced my sugar intake (as a result of the LE diet), and I honestly think that could be another reason for it. I still eat one sweet thing a day...usually at night when the kids are in bed. That is definitely when he is most active...about 15 minutes after I eat my dessert! :) I am also just hoping that he is a laid-back little boy. That would be SO great! But, if I don't start feeling more in the next month or so, I may talk to my doc about it, just in case.
My grandpa finally passed away Saturday night...so I'm flying across the country to go to the funeral and be with my family. I'm going by myself...and while I'm not glad for the reason, it will be wonderful to see my family and get a little break. :) (Haven't seen them since Christmas.)
Hope you're all well!
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Rainbow i'm sorry about your grandpa, I know sometimes at the end if its dragged on it can almost feel like a relief that they aren't suffering anymore. I hope the funeral went as well as possible for that sort of thing, and at the very least was a good excuse for all the family to get together.
I 'liked' your comment in response to the weight stuff. Basically exactly the same as me. I weighed 8-10 pounds less than I did when I conceived ds1 and 2, so despite gaining more, by 22 weeks than in previous pregnancies, I look the same. Just hoping the weight gain slows down once my body realises i'm no longer starving it!!! Surely 22 weeks of eating healthy is enough to ram that theory home?
During LE I used sugar to bulk out calories, because my le meals often left me short of the lower goal total, so once i filled my salt/fat/protein limits, I made up the rest in empty calories... i.e. SUGAR. This left me with quite the sweet tooth, because before LE I never even liked sugary things, I would always choose cheese or dip or something savoury for a treat over something sweet. But now, my gosh have I ever changed, now I want sugar all the time and have had to focus on cutting down slowly over the pregnancy and trying to get back to a more healthy balance. I have been trying to replace the sugar cravings with fruit, so when I want something sweet I feel like i'm having it, just not quite as hard to process for my body as something artificial. I've also been focussing on upping nutrients without too much saturated fat, so have been eating lots of avocado, adding coconut oil, flax seed, almond meal and cinnamon to my oats in the morning, and replacing a few cups of tea with peppermint tea. I'm hoping these things will keep my nutrients high while stopping me from gaining so rapidly, and i'm defiantly not overeating, because I tracked my calories just for fun the other day, I only ate 1800! WTF? How is it possible to gain so rapidly, only eating that much? I asked my naturopath when I was having acupuncture (my back has gone, majorly, I'm a bloody cripple so finally decided to be proactive and ask for help) and he thinks i'm storing fluid. Great. Nothing I can do there other than drink lots of water and keep moving.
How is everyone else?
Meeks you make me feel bad, actually I felt bad already... I've been so unhealthy this pregnancy, not that I've been eating loads but quite a bit of chocolate. Honestly I don't feel like I can get through the day without it. I'm so utterly exhausted with the boys that I find I often forget to eat, then suddenly feel sick as a result, don't have time to make something healthy so grab a chocolate bar, which I barely manage to chew!!
Aside from that I'm a serious carb junkie. I don't actually feel I've put on as much weight at this stage as I had with DS2. But probably more than DS1... I tend to pile on big time at the end of pregnancy though. And I've got a fair amount of blubber around my tummy and hips! :-(
Rainbow-so sorry to hear about you Grandpa. It's always hard even when you know the end is near. Hope having some family time was good!
Ok so here I am in the 3rd trimester! How did this happen? This pregnancy is flying by and then again it isn't! To be a mom of three sooner rather than later. Eck! So I have a quick question about nap time or even bed time for those of you with three or more. How do you get them to bed all at the same time? Right now I put DS2 to bed and my DH puts DS1 to bed. We read books and then say prayers and then they are both in bed. It takes us both 15 minutes tops and It works so perfectly!!!! NOW How does this work for my DH? Since I will more than likely be nursing the baby this is going to fall on him for at least the 1st month or so. Please give me your bedtime routines if you have one! I am a planner and I am already thinking about how this is going to work! I want this to be an easy transition for DH so he feels like he can tackle it and not feel overwhelmed bc then I will have to help more than I'd like to in that first month if it isn't easy for DH.
Thanks for the advice!!!!!
Tree-I'm with you on the chocolate! I can't stop! I want to eat it ALL the time. Well that and cinnamon rolls! Weird! This pregnancy I have been having major sweet tooth cravings. Hmmmm maybe that's why I am gaining weight so rapidly! No.....it's because of the LE diet! See denial !!!! :-)
Soar I'm guessing your boys are in separate rooms then? Ours are in the same room so get stories together, not that ds2 pays much attention (he's only one)... Anyway, perhaps if they are in separate rooms they could take it in turns to go into each others room for joint story time? Or you could find a mutual place for them to have stories. On occasion we have done stories on the sofa and then into bed. Wherever you do it, if you decide this can work for you, it's lovely to all be together. Perhaps have a few trial runs before number three arrives to see if it works? And if it does you can properly get into that routine before the next baby arrives so its not another big change.
I am in the same boat of going from two to three, so I'm prob not the best person to offer advice...
My big worries are things like, how are we going to get out of the house!! :-)
Myrainbowgirl sorry to hear about your grandfather. I hope you are able to catch up with lits of family while you are away.
I feel huge too ladies. I had my routine ob app yesterday and when he measured my tummy he shook his head, looked and my notes and remeasured! I said something like "i feel enormous" and he just said I think you win the prize this month! Oh God i am his biggest patient! DH and I made the most of having a baby sitter and went to the ballet afterwards. FYI seeing twenty slim, beautiful vietnamese ballet dancers is not a good idea when 29 weeks pg!
I am not eating much in the way if junk as it is either really expensive or impossible to get out here but now weigh 2.5 kilos more than my normal weight which added to the 10kg I lost during the LE diet means i have put on 12.5 kilos in 29 weeks! That's 27.6 lbs!!!!! I am still well within the NHS normal healthy weight band for non pg women but feel like a bloater nonetheless!
Add me to the big and bulky club!! I think that the lack of running, coupled with LE diet was my downfall...but I am determined to lose the weight once baby is here and getting back into my exercise groove.
Myrainbowgirl...I pray that the time with family is blessed, that you get to spend a little of that time enjoying your wee baby inside and that the journey is safe. Your grandpa will live on in your heart and if you are lucky like me, in your wee man.
Soar....I usually do all the bedtime stuff...and I find getting the bath/teeth done first urges them to race towards the couch for books, then we go up and settle in for prayers, hugs and kisses. Once in a while my hubby helps, and it does speed it up...so if you are not nursing, then your DH will have a break on those days....otherwise, he will learn the routine fast!!!!
AFM....the idea of three, the reality of three......both seem to sound good. My boys are so ready for a new baby and I know that even with all the health concerns we have for her, she is going to be what we need. I have been working hard at work, then on the shed, then housework and most nights fall into bed wiped out....can't wait for mat. leave to start....only just over a week away!
Oh no sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad! All I want to eat is junk but I am annoyed that even without it I am stacking it on. Maybe I should just start eating what I want and forget it since it seems inevitable anyway. I did eat a lot of crap for a month or so after bfp though. And I still have my days.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tree
I need to find time to exercise. I have no time. Urgh.
You know what it is? I think its LE making me skinny and then now I have really bad self image (worse than before) because I know how I was and how I am now. I think it's actually a problem, as in, I am obsessing over what I'm gaining rather than just enjoying it. I would tell other women to forget it and enjoy!
This is something I've been thinking about too. Your existing routine sounds exactly how we do things, so I'll be watching your keenly for advice when the time comes. The only thing I can think of is what we do now if dh or I are not home for bed time, which is take them both into ds2's room, read his 3 stories (ours have to have a number limit or we'd be there all night!) then ask ds1 to go to his room and choose his 3 stories while we put ds2 down and then read to ds1 in his room. Mine are 2 and 4 and this works for the nights when one of us is out, so maybe it will work when baby is here. I find doing it this way works because the older kid will sit through the young stories but the younger one won't sit through the old stories. So my dh is also getting lumped with the task of reading to both when baby arrives, at least for a month or two while I get some sort of routine or predicability happening.Quote:
Originally Posted by Soar
Sorry Iīve been MIA lately, busy as always at work, DSīs being great, DH being great, getting bigger fast and liking it:) I love being preggers, huge boobs, thghs and tummy, face a little pouty as well:) Looking forward to seeing this little man who has taken up such a "valuable" space in my life, still feeling sad, but leaving the feeling on tow behind me, trying not to let it catch up on me. He has been going through a period of very regular sleeping patterns, now he sleeps more, probably growing.. Right now he is kicking against my laptop, making it bump ever so little. Am glad to see everyone is progressing as we should. Iīm sorry I donīt get online as often as before, I know it has all to do with the boy vs girl thing.. by stopping here it floats up in front of me.. so must speed on(does not sound very good does it? fleeing your difficulties?)
My cousin is pregnant, and I bet I know what she is having, she doesnīt know herself yet..
Hugs
Mathilde
Mathilde-glad u stopped in its great to hear from you!!!
Ladies I just totally burned macaroni and cheese in our microwave so badly that the entire house reeks of burn smell! It's awful! Every window is open and I cleaned all the surfaces in the kitchen and microwave and it is still so strong! My DH is working from home so I asked if it was super strong and he wasn't really bothered by it! I have all fans on and am burning every pretty scented candle I can find and this smell won't leave me alone! I am such a mess this pregnancy! This has been my lifestory since I have been pregnant this time! Oh and not to mention I backed into my DH's brand new truck 2 weeks ago! Dented his tailgate so badly and took out my rear bumper and tail light! nobody was hurt the boys were not in the car with me but none the less the damage is there! Ugh.... I am an accident waiting to happen these days!
I'm off to try to find more candles!
Mathilde good to hear from you, I don't get online as much now either, between work, pregnancy, my two boys, dh, etc things are just busy, we all understand. Good to hear you are feeling more positive and finding a way to move forward. Nothing wrong with fleeing the feelings, "fake it until you make it"! That's what I did with ds2 I think.
Soar that's so funny about the burn smell, I can totally relate. I am smelling ds2's nappy changes long after they've been binned. Dh can't smell it, but I can't avoid it. I have been burning soy wax melts which I never do, just to cover it!
Sorry about your and dh's truck/car accident. That really sucks, and is such a pregnancy brain thing to do. I am so the same. I keep waiting for something to happen, I am seriously loosing brain cells by the day. It's scary. I keep reminding myself that dumb people don't realise they are dumb. So as long as I know I'm dumb, it can't be that bad. Lol
I have started getting super hormonal. I am super sensitive to every comment, things I would usually brush off, I stress about for days. Someone looked at me at kinder the other day, and asked how pregnant I was, I said 21 weeks (at the time) and she looked me up and down and said "WELL, somebody's been eating well then haven't they?" With a smile. As if smiling makes it ok to be a bitch. Usually I could just think "you are a bitch" and smile and walk off. But I went home, cried, stressed, and even went so far as I track my calories for the previous 3 days to see if gaining 10kg really is my fault. Of course it isn't, I was only eating 1600-1800 calories a day, but she made me so insecure I have been panicking ever since. I already had worry and doubt but now it's so much worse. LE was a bit unhealthy for me mentally I think, because now I identify with my underweight self, not my normal weight self, and anything over that thin me, = fat.
That's just one example, but my hormones are clearly making me neurotic. I have also lost my temper at the kids more often and found myself yelling at them when I hardly ever do. I am trying to control it but struggling. Of course this gives me guilt, then I spiral into a "why am I having 3 when I can't handle 2" guilt trip. Followed by "I'm a bad mum". Sigh
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Oh meeks I wish i was brave enough to send you a photo of my 29 week bulge you would breathe a sigh of relief thinking at least I am not as bad as her! Hormones are crappy things - i nearly burst into tears because a friend dashed off after DS2s gym class rather than waiting and sharing a taxi home. pathetic ;)
On a positive note i think we have found somewhere to stay when we go back to England. It is near family rather than being on top of them and not too badly priced.
I hear you. I've had to go to the doctor 3 weeks in a row because my BP has been high due to extreme anxiety/stress. I can literally feel it moving through my veins! I'll wake up with a butterfly sick feeling in my stomach and have no idea why and just be anxious all day. It's honestly the weirdest thing ever and I've never been like this before!Quote:
Originally Posted by Waiting4Daisy
I also totally get how you feel with being team green. I'm happy we stayed that way but I also just want to know. I checked out your nub and honestly have no clue.. not great at knowing whether it's actually a nub your seeing or not. What made you think both genders at the 20 week ultrasound?
Had my 32 week scan to check on the low lying placenta yesterday and it's moved enough out of the way so I won't need a C-section (at least for that reason!) It was really cute and the ultrasound tech was great. She showed us the baby moving it's mouth and practising "breathing" so you could see it's tummy going up and down. I am still SO at a loss for what the gender is. The tech said "She" and "her" in the same sentence and both DH and I heard her. I think she realized she said something because she was quite quiet after when she's been very chatty before. I'm sure it was just a slip though because I don't even know if she would have seen a glimpse yet. Of course DH and I can't stop talking about it and we're trying to remember if it was before or after she was looking at the femur - which I also was watching for and didn't see anything so it was likely just an innocent slip - but way to get us all confused! She told us to look away as she was going to check out the goods and that was so hard not to look! I could have sworn after that I heard her say "he's" but she had a very think accent and my hubby was on high alert and said all he ever heard her say was "it's" and no "he" so who knows. GAH, Only 8 weeks to go max until we'll know I guess!
Oh and I am so packing on the pounds this pregnancy compared to normal. I've never gained more than 25lbs with both boys and this time I'm at 25lbs at 32 weeks... so still more weight left to come on!!
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Hi ladies,
Thanks for all the condolences. It was a good time with my family, and I am so glad I was able to go.
Mathilde - Glad to hear that you are enjoying being preggo, and feeling somewhat at peace about DS3! Completely understand your sadness, though.
Waiting4Daisy & black&gold - I think you're both very much in the game for a girl, I think if I were in your shoes, I would be thinking girl all the way! So exciting!
Everyone else - Sounds like everyone's doing pretty well, except for the pounds creeping up on all of us!
I understand the emotional stuff, too. I definitely have struggled emotionally this time...I'm sure partially because of hormones, but definitely know it's more the anxiety over gender (before and after finding out) that has done me in. Trying to live in the moment and be happy with what God's given me...I am absolutely sure that once he's here, I will be in a much better place & so happy that God blessed us with him!
For the most part, I didn't hear any negative comments while I was on my trip...so happy about that! And really so far, only one truly negative comment...praying it stays that way. I know I need to just let it go even if I do hear it, but it's tough. Why oh WHY do I let other people's opinions matter?? Ugh. Working on it!
Baby boy is still pretty quiet...but overall feeling more movement, so not worried. Can't believe I'm 21.5 weeks already...time has been absolutely flying this pregnancy! We'll be holding our babies before we know it!
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Ahhh, it's so frustrating if the husbands see anything because they seriously have no idea what their looking for and at least with mine, anytime I try and replay a situation or whatever he starts to forget so it just makes everything so unknown! I guess you can count what he saw as nothing and assume 50/50 again because it could have been either from the pics he saw. And that's very interesting what the tech said.. maybe it is a little girl! We also saw all the shots when they were measuring the thighs at both 20 weeks and 32 week and I was surprised they didn't say to look away. I feel like with my other boys the penis was in almost every shot lol! But maybe the tech is just strategically doing it so things can't be seen.. oh who knows! Gahhh.. dying to know.Quote:
Originally Posted by Waiting4Daisy