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Hi Atomic,
I just saw you say in the main page chat that the effects of breastfeeding after weaning may linger and still sway pink. Can you or anyone elaborate on this?
I've been feeling in a very bad GD place lately, feeling doomed to never get my boy(s), and seeing that makes me feel like I'll be waiting ages before I can even try to sway for a boy (since I'm not due with my daughter until the beginning of June).
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I got pregnant with DS2 when DS1 was only 12 months old and was still nursing every day. One of my mommy friends got pregnant with her second little boy when her DS1 was a baby and nursing quite often so it's totally possible to get boys while breastfeeding!
my friend has 11 months between her boys. was exclusively breastfeeding... but ate like a horse!
I really feel like breastfeeding sways blue just bc of a typical breastfeeding diet. One of my boys was conceived while breastfeeding and another only a few weeks after weaning. I was always hungry so was constantly snacking, had zero caffeine bc I didn't want baby's sleeping to be affected, high nutrients and loads of water to keep my supply up. Because of all the snacking, it was a high calorie diet too.
I believe the idea is that it contributes to lower maternal condition plus the lack of sleep when nursing all night. I can see how it would sway pink for those who don't keep up their calories. But I was always hungry. And breastfeeding for a full year (or longer) was really important to me so I made sure to eat healthily enough.
I think it totally depends on diet. I'm currently breastfeeding my 4.5mo old and swaying pink. I eat the upper limit of calories, but I stick to the protein and fat amounts. I adopt the 80/20 rule- 80% healthy foods and 20% sweets or empty calories.
I totally see how this can go either way for pink or blue. I think the diet and exercise matters most while nursing. Constantly snacking and moderate exercise will put someone on the blue end, while sticking to 2-3 meals with no snacking (60g fat and 60g protein) and doing cardio will put someone on the pink end. You don't have to avoid healthy foods to sway pink- it's about sticking to fat/protein totals while not snacking that is important for pink. All my GFs who have all girls eat quite healthy they just don't snack and do lots of cardio. They all breastfed until 20+ months.
[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2[emoji577], & DS3[emoji602][emoji170][emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
I agree I think it only will sway if you are also doing the diet. I got pregnant with boys twice while ebf.
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Thanks guys! My husband is one of 4 (3 boys -- all Irish twins -- and then their last, a girl), and I know his mom got pregnant with his younger two brothers all while breastfeeding or exclusively breastfeeding.
I just get nervous, since the same sex siblings close together is another stress, since in my anecdotal observations, Irish twins tend to be the same sex, and I'm desperate for a boy after this girl. Still nervous that there's some sort of undiscovered link that results in this...
But then again, maybe because my diet and lifestyle were SO LE before, being HE for breastfeeding can only help me go blue?
It's because it is not a switch that is y/n. It's a biological process that takes time before your body returns to its hormonal "normal". That's all. Please don't overthink this.
I got a boy when breastfeeding too and also with a close spacing. It's just one thing that may help a little.
Not singling out this post in particular but just addressing several of the posts above.Quote:
Originally Posted by Babygirlquest
You CANNOT look at people you know either breastfeeding or Irish twins and take anything away from that. The reason why is because these are not random sample groups. The vast majority of people do not breastfeed that long to start out with and those of us who do attempt to TTC when nursing are very much in the minority. We also tend to be a little more "crunchy" than the average person and it is not a random sample whatsoever.
Additionally, people who can get successfully pregnant while EBF, just regular BF, and/or with very close child spacing are again, not the norm. These people are very likely in better health overall, higher in fertility, and are probably eating more than the average new mom because many times people's cycles will be very wacky and unable to conceive until later on even without breastfeeding. Just that they are able to be ovulating and get and stay pregnant at all means they are in a different place than the norm, who are not able to. I have a blue swayer right now who never nursed her baby at all and she's still at 6 months postpartum and hasn't had a cycle yet. This is the NORM in most cultures and throughout human history and that is why breastfeeding can often be used as a reliable birth control method for many people. It is also very likely that many of the Irish twins (not all but many) are in moms who bottlefeed from birth and they too are often a different sample group than let's say a lady who is still nursing at 3 years old. not only socioeconomic and diet factors come into play, but also because a lack of nursing may make the body believe that the baby did not survive.
If someone starts off 80% likely to conceive one gender and ends up 60% likely to conceive that gender, it is still a HUGE sway even though overall they are still more likely to conceive a certain gender than the average.
^^^and this is why I feel that if I do get pregnant while nursing a little one, it will probably be another boy. I know I'm doing the LE diet, exercise, and one attempt, but I feel that being able to even get pregnant under these circumstances will still give me another sweet DS [emoji20][emoji4]
[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2[emoji577], & DS3[emoji602][emoji170][emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
I conceived my ds2 while breastfeeding my first (he was only 6 months and feeding a lot!) I was sure I would have a girl as id lost loads of weight breastfeeding and was anemic! But no! I was snacking a lot I think, and eating plenty of good food as I was hungry all the time.
please understand I make those numbers UP to illustrate a point.Quote:
Originally Posted by XXforhubby
I got 3 boys without breastfeeding, and a boy and a girl with breastfeeding. Virtually everyone can conceive when breastfeeding, it just may take a little longer for your cycle to come back. No matter what you're eating! So I think there is an underlying question here which I will answer - which is that I do believe it is very possibly better to eat more and breastfeed than to wean and get really strict on diet. I do not think any facts suggest that we should all wean and then get super strict on diet, and in fact things point to me, in the other direction (since we know a lot of people who were scarily strict on diet and still got boys anyway) breastfeeding 100% proven, does gently suppress fertility. is it a guarantee or magic bullet, no, but it IS doing something real, hormonal/chemical in the body that affects fertility!
Just to get your cycle back and conceive that soon indicates you are in better condition and more fertile than someone who does not get their cycle back until 18 months.Quote:
Originally Posted by honeybee37
What you guys have to remeber is this is like an iceberg. A LOT is going on under the surface. Your overall fertility and condition are not ONLY about what you are eating that month you conceive or even a few months before that - it has to do with a lifetime of diet and lifestyle and exercise and your body type and all sorts of things. We get so focused on the stuff we see/remember we forget how our moms always made us eat breakfast before going to school when we were 10, yk???
I conceived my ds3 while breastfeeding my ds2. Now I'm breastfeeding both of them. I feel like I'm going to have to wait a long time to TTC because of this. I feel like it helps sway boys.
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Ack, this really makes me feel I'm doomed to only girls based on my lifestyle my whole life. Will keep clinging to the "women recovered from EDs have more boys" thing [emoji27]Quote:
Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush
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It doesn't.Quote:
Originally Posted by emilyloeb11
I got my girl while breastfeeding 2 boys.
Please try to also keep in mind that you don't even know that you're "set" for girls. You have conceived only one. We have people on here (or who have been in the past) with 4-5-6-7-8 girls!! The majority of people have BG or GB boom-boom just like that without even thinking of any of this stuff. We know of many people both on this site and IRL (like Mel Gibson and his ex and Eleanor Roosevelt and FDR) who had a girl and then 5-6-7 boys in a row!!Quote:
Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther
I just really think you're drawing conclusions that those of us with 3-4 or more in a row may have to consider that you don't even know you have to!!!
You're probably right :( I think my mom's own GGG (and how she treated us as a result) constantly just haunts me... she even held my niece this weekend (from my husband's side) and said, "With our luck we'll just have another girl" [emoji20]Quote:
Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush
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We have tons of ladies on here who are from 3 girl families with lots of boys. It actually is a compounding factor for their GD because they just expected to have girls and girls are all they know.
Panther! Take a deep breath girl! Don't fear, we can do this!!! Everyone is different and you will know what to do and change when the time comes to ttc again!!
For me personally, I only changed minor things when we tried for DD3! Like XX said, I was eating low cal foods with more carbs then protein and NO snacking-I mean ever! Lots of coffee/ diet coke and tons of cardio when I worked out or I was sedentary. minimal weights. That was just what my lifestyle had become.DD 1, my son was almost 3, and I hadn't bf'd for 2 years! lol. DD2 & 3 were conceived while minimally breastfeeding (only 3 times a day), but with minimal dietary changes. So, I still plan to factor breastfeeding into my sway because for fertility reasons (I have only had 1 pp cycle in Feb) and I already have 3 GIRLS and need all of the calories I can get! You can do this!!
When are you planning to ttc again? Our first cycle will probably be August/September time. & No matter your daughter will be amazing! I'm always here if you need to talk!!
XX!! I wasn't sure if my eyes were deceiving me or if you were really swaying again! Congrats!!
&& take all my pink dust and send me your blue dust!!!!! I really hope you get your baby girl!<3
When are you planning to ttc?
Thank you so much ♡♡♡♡ You too, atomicQuote:
Originally Posted by bre_cooper11
I think my shower just brought me back into the headspace I hate being in, hence my spiraling here. Your post and these replies have made me feel so much better already!
I'd ideally like to "try" December onward, or at least be "primed" for a boy if something happens during this time. I don't know what to expect postpartum for me though anyway, and I am planning on exclusively breastfeeding through 6 months (if all that goes according to plan!)
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Totally understandable!! So many of us have felt this way!! All of my friends are now having boys lol... Im secretly like 'how'd you do that?????'.Quote:
Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther
This is where we are at too! DD#3 is almost 7 months and will be 10 months in August, and this is much longer than I planned on BF'ding (but Im grateful, too). My goal is to nurse until we get settled in our house in the states and then it's on full swaying! <3 <3 <3 <3 You will know when the time is right!!
You don't have to wean to get a boy- I'm proof in that! I've gotten a boy twice now while BFing- one with a classic boy lifestyle and one from a girl sway opposite.
I think BFing can lend towards keeping your appetite up. Plus, the HE diet will totally help your milk supply stay nice and abundant. I wouldn't wean of swaying boy, IMO.
Bre- Thank you for your pink dust! I need every sparkle you have! I'll gladly give you all of my blue dust, along with you TP ( I've got loads!) [emoji597][emoji92][emoji170][emoji843][emoji170][emoji94]!
I just kept feeling like there is someone I haven't met yet. My DH is now fully on board and we will keep trying until next June, if need be [emoji4]!
I'm full on girl swaying, and I'm still BFing. I'm one of those women that is an over producer even while limiting food intake. Even when sick (I have a horrid cold at the moment), my milk supple doesn't dip! The only thing that does is AF, but then it rebounds.
Diet and exercise totally trumps anything, IMO. Remember to exercise moderately (If only I could do my Insanity I would have these last few lbs gone!!) and snack between meals. You don't have to eat a huge amount of calories to do this- just keep your blood sugar stable. 2-3 small snacks are enough to do this. Just keep your 3 meals slightly lower in calories to off set the snacks, if you don't want to gain much weight.
I'm so glad to see you back again Bre! You give me inspiration that I can totally handle 4 babies [emoji8]!
[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2[emoji577], & DS3[emoji602][emoji170][emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
XX, that is so sweet thank you!!! I will say 3-4 was my hardest adjustment but I believe it's because outside factors, not the kids really. DH and I both come from big families but with large age gaps. I much prefer them closer together, even though the earlier years are bonkers! haha!
I do agree it's more diet and exercise! I am similar that my milk is very unaffected by my diet. We are worried about lower fertility and want to do whatever it takes to increase our fertility in general but that's mostly because we have already a lot stacked against us (our girl vs boy ratio). Ugh. Either way, we will play it by ear and do what Emmie needs and wants, too. I hope to just convert to nursing at bedtime and go from there. Also, I am hoping to have a few cycles before ttcing to temp and chart. We will have to see what July brings!!
Throwaway, I am one of four girls and had GD when I found out that my first child was a girl. Of course, now she is almost three and the MOST amazing thing in the entire universe!!! I too was anxious to start swaying blue while still pregnant with her. I thought I would only breastfeed for 6 months or so but we went strong for 2.5 years! I did change my lifestyle quite a bit as far as paying attention to what I ate and always eating a proper breakfast. Breastfeeding did help me take in a lot more calories along with alot more water. We have decided TTC for blue in May and I am a bit anxious but I think the lifestyle changes I have made since my daughter was born will help. It would be nice to have a boy, but if another daughter is anything like the one I have, I will be blessed :) Just wait until you hold your daughter!Quote:
Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther
Thank you and good luck with your sway!! I'll be following your quest for blue!Quote:
Originally Posted by mrsellis127
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I should note, too: I do have a cousin, 1 of 4 girls and longtime smoker, who had a girl first than had a son within two years!Quote:
Originally Posted by mrsellis127
I'm hoping still my feelings change when this baby's born, but I know right now my desire for a little boy is unending :( An awful pregnancy has not made this GD any easier
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It's hard to love a theoretical baby tho. I wanted a boy with my first and got him, but I did not feel "in love" with him till he was like a week old. He came out and I was like :omg: ZOMG it's a BABY!! I don't know what I thought was gonna happen haha but it was still this weird shock when I looked at him and it really hit me this is my kid, here. :/ Point being, don't be hard on yourself if you don't feel this mystical connection with your baby, honestly I never have either with any preganncy, especially with my first. I think the tendency is to blame that on GD feelings but trust me, it is NORMAL with or without GD!!! Pregnancy sucks, and it's largely something that HAPPENS to you, that you have to endure, and not this wonderful amazing experience.