Possibly joining one more time...

Hello,
I frequently visited this site a few years ago while trying for baby number 2. After over a year of swaying, dieting..I was so stressed, lost too much weight and stopped ovulating. I needed fertility treatment and a doctor to tell me to gain a few pounds to get pregnant. My second son was born and i apologize I never got myself to come back to the site.
So we are considereing a 3rd. I've been loosely dieting/swaying a little over 2 months and may attempt next month. I already lost a few pounds, but seem to stay steady at a bmi of 18 (last time I fell under 18). I've consistently had a 12-15 hour fast, 2-3 cups of coffee (with Splenda, cinnamon and soy creamer). My first meal is usually a salad, apple and little peanut butter, non fat yogurt with fruit, rice cake. Dinner is a lot of veggies and I haven't cut out chicken and turkey ...I have some of that a few times a week ( last time I had very little meat). My only issue with the no snacking is I'm starving when I get home from work so I start eating while I get dinner together ( does it count if one meal lasts 2-3 hours..?
I take fiber before eating....just started the folic acid...and I take an occasional elderberry when I feel sick. I always said if I try again I should get an actual plan.

I see the big thing is still one attempt. Last time, I had to have 2 attempts because of my fertility treatment. Wondering if that could have been a factor,

Thanks for reading if you made it this far...any thoughts...advice are really appreciated!

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Originally Posted by PinkDaisy

Hello,
I frequently visited this site a few years ago while trying for baby number 2. After over a year of swaying, dieting..I was so stressed, lost too much weight and stopped ovulating. I needed fertility treatment and a doctor to tell me to gain a few pounds to get pregnant. My second son was born and i apologize I never got myself to come back to the site.
So we are considereing a 3rd. I've been loosely dieting/swaying a little over 2 months and may attempt next month. I already lost a few pounds, but seem to stay steady at a bmi of 18 (last time I fell under 18). I've consistently had a 12-15 hour fast, 2-3 cups of coffee (with Splenda, cinnamon and soy creamer). My first meal is usually a salad, apple and little peanut butter, non fat yogurt with fruit, rice cake. Dinner is a lot of veggies and I haven't cut out chicken and turkey ...I have some of that a few times a week ( last time I had very little meat). My only issue with the no snacking is I'm starving when I get home from work so I start eating while I get dinner together ( does it count if one meal lasts 2-3 hours..?
I take fiber before eating....just started the folic acid...and I take an occasional elderberry when I feel sick. I always said if I try again I should get an actual plan.

I see the big thing is still one attempt. Last time, I had to have 2 attempts because of my fertility treatment. Wondering if that could have been a factor,

Thanks for reading if you made it this far...any thoughts...advice are really appreciated!

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Anyone??

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Originally Posted by PinkDaisy

Anyone??

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I wanted to respond as I know you are waiting. I am sorry it sounds like you had a tough time last time you swayed. I also lost too much weight when I first swayed and lost ovulation (mine I lost around BMI 18.1/18.2 so I know I cannot fall below that now). When it came back the next month, I ended up not being as strict about the counting calories etc. and just kept skipping breakfast,not snacking, and I ate less but didn't track it as severely as I did before and mostly ate vegetarian (which I prefer now anyway, I actually don't like to eat meat now that I have been doing LE for about a year but I still throw in some chicken or fish some nights to make sure I don't lose ovulation again). Also, I dropped fiber altogether since it really seems to make me lose weight fast - although I used it over the holidays since I knew I would have to eat more around extended family.

I don't know about the one attempt anymore. I read so much confusing things about it tbh. I was told to do e4d plus one attempt at opk because I am older. But I am still swaying pink so really I don't want to do this if one attempt makes such a big difference. However, if you look at the stats spreadsheet, there are people who did 1 attempt and still get boys even with the diet/exercise so of course it is no magic bullet. Still, I know I would feel like I lost my chance if I did two attempts and then got a boy so it's hard not to stick with the one attempt.

What I can say to you is I became pregnant with a boy on one attempt. And I remember this distinctly because DH had been traveling, we dtd when he came home (cd9) and that was it because I thought depositing inside cd10 was too close to ovulation. But I got pregnant anyway and according to my early U/S I would have Ov on cd12. I was not on the diet at that time and I was doing occasional exercise - I was thin but not skinny whereas now I am ridiculously skinny. Actually weigh less than I did as a teenager. I've been quite addicted the cardio which is good for the sway! :) Before, I didn't ever skip breakfast and I snacked all the time. I would say I did not go more than an hour and a half to two hours without eating something. Now I sometimes can make it on 2 meals or at the most 3. And atomic will tell you there are always going to be opposites even if you have a perfect sway. In my case, I think the diet (mostly) and exercise was really the biggest factor.

When you were gaining weight before you conceived ds2, were you still skipping breakfast or did you start snacking? It may have been a combination of things, you know? Like atomic has said, these things don't work in isolation. I think I remember her saying (she can correct me :)) that some people came to this site, saw the one attempt stat and just did that without changing diet/exercise and then got a boy. So, I do think it's probably multi-factorial and, also, just plain luck.

I wish I had answers for you but I am sure atomic does. I just wanted to respond because I know you are waiting. I really only can say, faith is what keeps me going with swaying. I pray every single day that our daughter will find our family worthy of joining us.

I hope you get your heart's desire. Good luck! x

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Originally Posted by dreamofdaughter

I wanted to respond as I know you are waiting. I am sorry it sounds like you had a tough time last time you swayed. I also lost too much weight when I first swayed and lost ovulation (mine I lost around BMI 18.1/18.2 so I know I cannot fall below that now). When it came back the next month, I ended up not being as strict about the counting calories etc. and just kept skipping breakfast,not snacking, and I ate less but didn't track it as severely as I did before and mostly ate vegetarian (which I prefer now anyway, I actually don't like to eat meat now that I have been doing LE for about a year but I still throw in some chicken or fish some nights to make sure I don't lose ovulation again). Also, I dropped fiber altogether since it really seems to make me lose weight fast - although I used it over the holidays since I knew I would have to eat more around extended family.

I don't know about the one attempt anymore. I read so much confusing things about it tbh. I was told to do e4d plus one attempt at opk because I am older. But I am still swaying pink so really I don't want to do this if one attempt makes such a big difference. However, if you look at the stats spreadsheet, there are people who did 1 attempt and still get boys even with the diet/exercise so of course it is no magic bullet. Still, I know I would feel like I lost my chance if I did two attempts and then got a boy so it's hard not to stick with the one attempt.

What I can say to you is I became pregnant with a boy on one attempt. And I remember this distinctly because DH had been traveling, we dtd when he came home (cd9) and that was it because I thought depositing inside cd10 was too close to ovulation. But I got pregnant anyway and according to my early U/S I would have Ov on cd12. I was not on the diet at that time and I was doing occasional exercise - I was thin but not skinny whereas now I am ridiculously skinny. Actually weigh less than I did as a teenager. I've been quite addicted the cardio which is good for the sway! :) Before, I didn't ever skip breakfast and I snacked all the time. I would say I did not go more than an hour and a half to two hours without eating something. Now I sometimes can make it on 2 meals or at the most 3. And atomic will tell you there are always going to be opposites even if you have a perfect sway. In my case, I think the diet (mostly) and exercise was really the biggest factor.

When you were gaining weight before you conceived ds2, were you still skipping breakfast or did you start snacking? It may have been a combination of things, you know? Like atomic has said, these things don't work in isolation. I think I remember her saying (she can correct me :)) that some people came to this site, saw the one attempt stat and just did that without changing diet/exercise and then got a boy. So, I do think it's probably multi-factorial and, also, just plain luck.

I wish I had answers for you but I am sure atomic does. I just wanted to respond because I know you are waiting. I really only can say, faith is what keeps me going with swaying. I pray every single day that our daughter will find our family worthy of joining us.

I hope you get your heart's desire. Good luck! x

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Thank you so much for responding! I was still on the diet for the most part...no breakfast but I did up calories. I also had 2 attempts. Thanks again..just seeing if there is anything else I should stick to if we do go thru with this.

Well, you're already below my minimum cutoff of 18.5 BMI so you need to do whatever it takes to keep weight on.

You are not eating enough. Without totals for fat, protein, and calories I can't say for sure but what you've listed it seems very unlikely to me you are getting adequate nutrients to keep you ovulating. You need a minimum of 30 g fat and I doubt you're getting that. Everyone for some reason focuses on chicken but chicken is NOT a good way to keep weight on or to keep ovulating. You need fat and calories for that.

Low carb veggies are free and unlimited. Fruit and higher carb veg (like potatoes, beetroot, corn) are free for protein and fat, count only carbs in them. So you will need to eat even MORE to compensate if you're including those in your daily totals.

It is imperative, and I mean IMPERATIVE that you do not start out too strictly, stick to strict sway tactics too long, and relax on things sooner rather than later in a controlled and orderly fashion to prevent what happened the last time. If you're getting to a year without a BFP and you've wasted away to nothing and have to basically sway blue to get pregnant, that's not what we are aiming at. If you let me, I'll help you gradually ease up

No more fiber. That needs to go right away given your weight and history of losing ovulation. You also should not be using cinnamon. Cinnamon is only for people who have moderate to severe PCOS and/or more than 30 lbs to lose.

I would rather see you bump to 3 meals a day than eat one meal for 2-3 hours. Please add in another meal between lunch and dinner (or eat dinner earlier and have a bedtime snack) not only to prevent that grazing but also to help keep weight on.

2 attempts is barely worse than 1 right now. I do have more faith with one attempt though, and prefer everyone start off at one and then we'll ease off of things that cut odds of conception gradually and possibly add attempts gradually, so you can get pregnant without having to chuck everything out the window and end up basically swaying blue.

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

Well, you're already below my minimum cutoff of 18.5 BMI so you need to do whatever it takes to keep weight on.

You are not eating enough. Without totals for fat, protein, and calories I can't say for sure but what you've listed it seems very unlikely to me you are getting adequate nutrients to keep you ovulating. You need a minimum of 30 g fat and I doubt you're getting that. Everyone for some reason focuses on chicken but chicken is NOT a good way to keep weight on or to keep ovulating. You need fat and calories for that.

Low carb veggies are free and unlimited. Fruit and higher carb veg (like potatoes, beetroot, corn) are free for protein and fat, count only carbs in them. So you will need to eat even MORE to compensate if you're including those in your daily totals.

It is imperative, and I mean IMPERATIVE that you do not start out too strictly, stick to strict sway tactics too long, and relax on things sooner rather than later in a controlled and orderly fashion to prevent what happened the last time. If you're getting to a year without a BFP and you've wasted away to nothing and have to basically sway blue to get pregnant, that's not what we are aiming at. If you let me, I'll help you gradually ease up

No more fiber. That needs to go right away given your weight and history of losing ovulation. You also should not be using cinnamon. Cinnamon is only for people who have moderate to severe PCOS and/or more than 30 lbs to lose.

I would rather see you bump to 3 meals a day than eat one meal for 2-3 hours. Please add in another meal between lunch and dinner (or eat dinner earlier and have a bedtime snack) not only to prevent that grazing but also to help keep weight on.

2 attempts is barely worse than 1 right now. I do have more faith with one attempt though, and prefer everyone start off at one and then we'll ease off of things that cut odds of conception gradually and possibly add attempts gradually, so you can get pregnant without having to chuck everything out the window and end up basically swaying blue.

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Thank you so much for your response!
I will try to stick to a small meal between lunch and dinner. I've tried that, but it ended up being snack foods. Maybe I need some ideas of what more to eat. I think last time I was so nervous to eat.
Is cinnamon bad for sway? I actually grew to like it in my coffee. According to bloodwork I do not have pcos. However, it has been questionable over the years due to cysts on my ovaries observed in sonograms.
I usually count totals for my first meal but not after since I feel like I'm picking. Do people have an easy way to track that? So 30 g of fat...1500 calories....40 G protein? We haven't had any attempts yet..debating next cycle. I would love your help. Should I get a plan? Thanks again!

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Originally Posted by PinkDaisy

Anyone??

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Oh and please give me at least a few days to get back to you - I answer from oldest to newest and so when you bump, it goes from my oldest to my newest posts and actaully makes it take even longer to reply!

There is nothing wrong with snack foods. When we say "do not snack" we mean don't munch constantly all dy long.

Try to keep in mind that last time, your nervousness to eat ended up backfiring. I promise it's ok to be more relaxed on diet than you have been in the past and in fact we have better results with that approach rather than the overly strict one.

Cinnamon is not bad for a sway but it can make weight fly off of you and that will stop your ovulation. I don't even use it for thin PCOSers (even with diagnosed PCOS) because it made people lose weight so drastically even at low doses. If you did have PCOS-tendencies (which I seriously doubt) we would change your diet rather than give you cinnamon.

I think the easiest way is just a pen and a paper but most use My Fitness Pal or similar programs and apps.

30 g fat, 1500 cals, and 40 g protein is the barest minimum. Most eat more than that and you very well may need more. You can go up to 60 g fat, 50 g protein for most people (but 30-40% do go up to 60 g protein as well) and 1800 calories (many go up to 2000)

I feel weird telling people to get a plan since it's in essence telling you to give me money, LOL. The plans are helpful, I rely on them for my income and always appreciate your guys' purchases (it allows me to do this as a job rather than having to work outside the home) and I can promise I'll get back to you sooner with a plan rather than in the free forums, esp. in January when I'm always slammed with new people. So if you feel like that would be something you'd like, great! If not, I help everyone regardless of their ability to pay, it just sometimes takes me a little longer that's all.

Thanks! I tried my fitness pal today. But it said 77 grams of protein? I had homemade eggplant parm for dinner...so not sure if that's something that put me over. Last time I really tried to limit sodium, but it seems sodium is not an important factor?
Is turkey and chicken a few times a week ok, or should I try and stay vegetarian. Also, I've never had exercise as part of my lifestyle since having kids. I'm just constantly running around, not a couch potato. Should I try to add exercise or will that cause more weight loss?
Also trying to figure out if me or my husband should be taking certain supplements? I only do folic acid...he does some random vitamins and supplements, Thanks again for any help!

yes but MFP counts the tiny amounts of protein and fat in fruits and veg which we don't count, and for us, low carb veg (such as eggplant) are free and unlimited - count nothing in them, have as much as you like.

Sodium does not matter at all. Virtually everyone gave it up and our results have only gone up since we did. I got my daughter eating tons of sodium after getting my 4th boy while limiting it.

Turkey and chicken within limits is fine. Some people choose to give it up but it's not mandatory. Just don't count on it to keep you ovulating!

We have not found the supplements for swaying are doing a whole lot. We do folic since that's been proven to help prevent birth defects, and some do fiber (but you shouldn't because it will make you lose weigh tand can stop ovulation) But I woulnd't have you or hubby take anything else. Some have their husbands take OLE and soy milk - although I can't give a blanket recommndation for that without knowing more about his health and any medication he's on.

Exercise is a gray area because while it can cause weight to come off, it DOES work really well so it may be worth the gamble. Up to you to decide - jusst be aware you'll have to eat a lot of calories more than you are, to ensure you keep ovulating while exercising.

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

yes but MFP counts the tiny amounts of protein and fat in fruits and veg which we don't count, and for us, low carb veg (such as eggplant) are free and unlimited - count nothing in them, have as much as you like.

Sodium does not matter at all. Virtually everyone gave it up and our results have only gone up since we did. I got my daughter eating tons of sodium after getting my 4th boy while limiting it.

Turkey and chicken within limits is fine. Some people choose to give it up but it's not mandatory. Just don't count on it to keep you ovulating!

We have not found the supplements for swaying are doing a whole lot. We do folic since that's been proven to help prevent birth defects, and some do fiber (but you shouldn't because it will make you lose weigh tand can stop ovulation) But I woulnd't have you or hubby take anything else. Some have their husbands take OLE and soy milk - although I can't give a blanket recommndation for that without knowing more about his health and any medication he's on.

Exercise is a gray area because while it can cause weight to come off, it DOES work really well so it may be worth the gamble. Up to you to decide - jusst be aware you'll have to eat a lot of calories more than you are, to ensure you keep ovulating while exercising.

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Thanks!!! I'm going to always add in that 3rd meal or snack. Would you suggest that and staying within limits to up my weight without swaying blue?
I find it hard to count exact calories and all when I take a little of this and a little of that...but if I'm maintaining weight and slowly upping my bmi, hopefully that's ok? I'm on day 13 now so I'll know soon if I ovulated. And then the plan is next cycle for first attempt. I feel like I've been on this site a lot but want to make sure I cover all bases and give it 💯...hoping to learn a few more last minute pointers. Thanks again!

The reason I have people track is so they don't cut back too far - people, over time, often start eating less and less without even realizing they're doing it. So if you're taking care to eat more, keeping an eye on the weight to see that it's holding steady or even a little weight coming back on if u've lost too much that is all good.

Good luck and let me know if you need anything.

Thank you!!