Confusing OPKs

I decided to use opks this cycle to get an idea of when I ovulate, and if we’re having our attempts at the correct time. I started testing in the afternoon from CD12 and seem to have been getting negatives except for CD14, which is darker than the rest but not darker than the control lines. The bottom opk is ‘fresh’ when the photo was taken, the rest are dried from prev days.

We have also being bd’ing this week just to ‘cover all bases’, but the opks aren’t making any sense to me, did I O or not? Should I keep using them? We’ll continue bd every second day for the remainder of the cycle as we usually do, just in case we don’t miss the egg if it hasn’t come up already (but again, prior to ttc in the previous months, according to the app’s general indication of O, we had unprotected attempts a few days after O as I was considered ‘safe’, and didn’t get pregnant).

I have also had O pains and cramps this week, but don’t know what’s going on with my ewcm. Tmi It’s hard to tell what’s cm or just semen when having attempts each day at varying times. Didn’t use lube(preseed) at all, and bd was still comfortable- meaning there was cm but it was just ‘up there’?

Also, these damn opks are so costly! Nearly $40aud for just 14 opks, didn’t have enough time to order cheaper online again this cycle :(

Gosh at that price I'd definitely stop testing and just keep BD.

From the way you describe your symptoms I suspect you did ovulate and the OPK just didn't pick it up. I almost wonder if the company mixed up the test box and control box, LOL (not relly but kind of!) The control line acts like I would have expected the test line to in these!!!

I would definitely keep testing but would not have you throw any more money away on OPK. I don't find the spendy OPK to be any more reliable at all. Based on symptoms I bet you've ovulated or are about to so I'd just keep BD and skip the testing. Good luck and blue dust headed your way!

Thanks for explaining Atomic. Don’t know why the opks are showing like this, I’ve read that some women have shorter surges so the opk might miss it, it’s why you test multiple times a day to catch the surge, but that’s too costly so I’ve only being testing once a day at 4pm. I’m glad we got our attempts in, but weren’t able to bd on Saturday. We bd on Sunday(cd17) but might have to skip today because of dh’s shift work. I tested an opk yesterday and today just now and got this: (attached pic).

What is my body doing? Why did I randomly get a dark-ish line yesterday but it’s almost gone today?

Is there any way you could test at 1 pm instead? That's when the hormone will be at the highest concentration in the urine for most people.

When possible, I"d BD again if you can. It may be that you're actually gearing up to ovulate now (this is within the normal parameters

OPK suck. I wish they didn't, but it's the truth - they're just not the greatest. They do stuff like this (usually in the month we want to try!) IT's not your body, it's just the suckiness of OPK tests. All we can do is take the OPK as they are, without expecting them to be more helpful than they are, and do our best to have our attempts when we're in the fertile window. Sorry, I SO wish they were better!

I actually took the CD17 and CD18 opks at around 2pm, but as you say these things aren't always reliable. Maybe the surge showed up later in my urine even though I may have ovulated earlier, is that possible? It's weird though because the lines were getting faint and suddenly gets dark for a day, and then back to a barely-there line. I also have no fertile cm at the moment, it's back to 'dry'/creamy. Still some slight O pains, but they were more noticeable 2 days ago and last week.

We couldn't BD on CD18, dh had his shift and we had no time to meet :( That's what's causing me anxiety about ttc every month, because dh's shift change every week, and they don't always align with my fertile days(hence bd in morning and afternoon, not just the night). We will bd today though and every other day this week.

Thanks for answering all my qs Atomic, I'm trying to be patient but then I think about all those who are pg right now, who probably didn't do much at all and just fell, and I feel so envious and down about myself.

Yep there's no timeline where the hormone gets concentrated enough in your urine. It's totally possible to have false negative OPK, where you're surging and it's not being picked up on the OPK.

I promise that you can miss the occasional day and still get pregnant with a boy. I got 3 of my 4 boys with my husband working nights and we definitely did NOT have the 3 attempts at positive OPK like we suggest here. The MAIN reason we do things that way is not because I think it's super important to do that, but instead because so many blue swayers can't give up on Shettles. Very, very few of us with all boys did things that way. I sure didn't! What we (I) did was have regular unprotected sex out of the fertile window, and then when we were trying, we had several attempts in the fertile window - not on certain days, but just when we could (working around our kiddos and hubby's schedule). And that's what you're doing! You are doing GREAT!!! Just keep doing what you're doing, and this will happen!!! You don't have to BD every day in the fertile window, you don't have to BD certain cycle days, you just have to BD regularly and the egg will be caught soon.

Thank you so much for the encouragement Atomic, and for giving me hope that I will have a son :)

I don't believe in Shettles timings because when I look at all the boy-heavy families around me(including my grandma/great grandma and dh's mum), they didn't time their bd for specific genders. They just had a lot of unprotected attempts over the years, including outside the fertile window because contraception wasn't really a thing at the time lol. Even if I'm not pg this cycle, we will keep the same bd pattern for future cycles and just try working around dh's schedule with morning/afternoon/night attempts. Hopefully the egg will get caught sometime!

EXACTLY!

It just mathematically can't be the case that all the boys in the world were conceived on O Day since if that was true, there would be scads more girls conceived (according to Shettles) O-4, 3, 2, and even O-1 depending on what version of Shettles you're using. Thanks for sharing your observations!

This will happen!! FXFXFX and blue dust headed your way!

So true, it wouldn't make sense to bd on just one or two days for a boy. Not to say boys aren't conceived-they are-but I've seen more girls born to couples who bd right after marriage or after being apart for some time, where they end up getting that one or two attempt at O.

Btw Atomic, I've been having weird pains in my abdomen today-not quite cramps but just a heavy feeling like I'm being pressed on, and it hurts if I bend over or pick something off the floor. Do you think it's related to AF? I expect her in a week's time. These 'symptoms' are frustrating because I didn't have them at this time of the cycle prior to ttc, where I would only get cramps a day or two before AF.

Yes that's something I've seen too - the honeymoon baby seems to often be a girl.

That crampy feeling can be from the secondary estrogen surge which happens around that point, but it can be a good sign for early pregnancy too. I don't want to get your hopes up but that mystery cramping is something that is often among the earliest signs of conception. FXFXFX!!

AF is here again, almost a week late.

Last night I got light spotting, my cm was brown. Woke up this morning and (sorry tmi) I dripped dark brown blood in the toilet, although my underwear was clean. I've never gotten spotting before my period, and when AF starts it just 'gushes', and is already in my underwear.

I don't know what to do at the moment, because I was sure I might be pg this month. I haven't taken any pg test and just waited to see what happened. Even the cramps I had weren't like af, they just felt 'different'. But what's worrying me atm is why AF was late. It hasn't been this late all year. Since coming off the pill my cycles have been 28-31 days. Only thing that may have affected it I think is my sleeping pattern. I had 2 weeks off from work, and my sleeping schedule changed dramatically (sleeping late/waking up late). But again I don't know exactly why.

Just to make sure everything is okay we'll be visiting my doctor. Are there any other concerns I should bring up?
Atomic do you think my supps are affecting our chances? I'm eating well, having lots of attempts etc, don't know why it still hasn't happened. And I know ttc can take a while, but my late AF this month is just a curveball that's confusing me :(

Another Q- if I got my period today, does that mean I actually ovulated 2 weeks ago from today? Even if I did we still had attempts that week

Yes you most likely ovulated late. Changes in schedule can cause delayed ovulation. It's possible you were pregnant as well. You could still be pregnant even with bleeding so I would take a test.

Remind me what supplements you're taking. The supplements I recommend shouldn't affect your cycle or your chances of conception (would only improve your chances!) but somemtimes people take something else and I like to review them when I get the opportunity.

Is your husband willing to have a sperm analysis?? That may be something to consider.

How much weight have you gained overall?

I think it may have been a chemical pregnancy, although I didn’t test(only have one pg test left!). But how is it possible to be pg if I’m having normal heavy AF bleeding? Another thing: the cramps I felt for many days were concentrated around my ovaries(or near there), and I can still feel them right now-is that normal? My typical AF cramps are felt in the ‘middle’.

As for my weight, it’s still in the optimum range, not super-skinny how I used to be, just ‘average’ skinny now. I eat very minimal junk food, only my normal meals with some snacking(not overboard with this though). I weigh 55 kilos, it’s been maintained at this level for many weeks now.

My supps: Elevit prenatal, Ostelin vitamin D 1000iu, Inner Health Plus probiotics

Although dh can have a sperm analysis, I think our gp won’t recommend and say it’s too early for one. I’m also not going to her yet, I will see maybe next week and discuss with her though.

Let’s see what happens in the next 3 cycles, if no bfp then we’ll get all the check-ups. Also- if say this was a chem preg, is it okay to ttc this cycle?

You can be pregnant and have a period. It happened to me personally! I had a 5 day "period" that was heavier than my normal period, and ended up with a baby 9 months later!

This is because you can have bleeding from your cervix or a fibroid that seems like a period, or you can lose some of the lining but not the part where the baby is implanted. Or, what happened to me, I was pregnant with twins and one twin didn't survive, and the other stayed with me. It is actually fairly common to have bleeding that seems like a period when pregnant, and I see it happen several times a year.

All types of cramping are normal. Cramps don't have to be centered in a particular spot. You can have pain that comes from the ovaries or fallopian tubes, or from the uterus, and some people may feel those in different ways in different months. All very common.

Yes I believe it's fine to TTC after a chemical. Some people swaying blue want to wait a month after a chemical, personally I think this is overkill and you're ready to go this month.

That's so interesting! I know you can have some bleeding/spotting when pg, but never knew it could be as heavy or heavier than a period! It just shows how differently our bodies can respond to ttc, lol. I have headaches atm, too, which I don't get during AF, and also being feeling soo tired and sleepy even though I'm resting well. I still haven't tested (just...don't want to waste a test atm), but I am preparing for this cycle anyway, and will test this time if my period is late.

Btw Atomic do you think my supps are fine? And should we keep up with the 4 days multiple attempts in fertile window? (plus eod for rest of the cycle)

Thank you again for keeping up with all my qs <3

Yes everything you were doing before was great, I wouldn't change any of it (unless you've added in supplements I don't know about!)

Ok great, I'll keep everything the same.

Also when I mentioned earlier that my sleeping patterns changed, it was actually during the tww- so the week after ovulation. I'm pretty sure I ovulated on time (and covered all bases the week of O and after), can that still affect AF arrival time? Unless of course it was a chemical, which explains why AF was 1 week late(not the norm).

I hope it doesn't mean I'll have any issues ttc this cycle or the future, though

Your period can't come late unless ovulation is late, or you are pregnant (very rarely you could have an ovarian cyst where the egg didn't ovulate properly, but I've only seen that happen twice in all this time) So our two possibilities are late ovulation or an early loss.

If it was a loss or delayed O, it doesn't mean you'll have any problems conceiving in the future. It happens sometimes that our cycle is longer than our norm, and it usually just goes right back to normal again. If it's longer again next month we need to possibly cut carbs/calories but I don't think you're at the point I have any concerns in that arena.