I really want a girl! Please help!

Hi guys

Long time lurker first time poster, hoping for some help here if i could.
im from Australia so have had to tweak some of the advice due to sups and foods here.

BACKGROUND
I have a almost 3 year old son, was devastated when i found out it wasnt a girl.I absolutely love my gorgeous DS, but am only having one more so want everything for it to be a girl. Ive dreamed of a mother / daughter relationship for a very long time.
It took us around 12 months to conceive our boy - i was tracking ovulation etc and had PCOS, along with DTD a lot, and hubbys sperm count is very very good.
I no longer have PCOS after having him - hooray!
I was on the pill for probably 12+ years before i had him.

Now:
I have been off the pill now and tracking cycles with Ava and FF for approx 2 months.
My first cycle was 40 days long and i am now on day 17 of my second cycle, which is has said ovulation today.
I have been eating keto for the last 9 months and have lost 15kgs - i am 166cm and now weigh 57.5kgs.
I am the healthiest ive been in a long time.

I have paid for the sway plans and eating plans and for the last 3 weeks we have been doing / changed:

ME:
Cut out all red meat except for maybe one cheat meal a week.
Eating lots of vegetarian and chicken
Switched to all low fats - cheese etc, but not a lot of dairy is consumed anyway
Adding in some carbs like rice, tortillas etc
Eating lots of green vegetables, no fruit
Fasting / skipping breakfast every day except saturday
Play basketball 4 times a week and workout at gym twice a week (this has always been the case though)
Drinking coconut water and sugarfree coke & energy drinks
Alcohol 3-5 times a week
Cutting out olive oil and un-necessary salt

SUPPLEMENTS being taken every day
Saw Palmetto
Cal-600 calcium
Metamucil
Vitex
Antihistamine (for allergies im on them anyway)


HUBBY:
Cranberry
Liquorice Root
Calcium
Soy milk

Hubby has generally been abstaining for 5-7 days anyway but we are currently using condoms.

So we were hoping to attempt in December but we are off on a child free holiday to India for a wedding for 3 weeks so i guess my question is whether i should just push back a month because i assume we will be BD every day or every second day, as it doesnt really work if we are going at it all the time! Also i assume while on holidays the diet will be a bit effected by extra alcohol and calories / limited exercise?
Im just worried about him / us trying to abstain if its right in the middle of our holiday?

Is the one attempt the vital part and when should i look at doing it? A day before O?
Should we attempt once while on holidays and then go back to using condoms?


Thanks so much in advance :)

Oh also i forgot to add i take magnesium at night to help sleep :)

Hi and welcome!

Who told you that you had PCOS and when was this?? I suspect your issues conceiving were more due to having been on the Pill for so long. PCOS doesn't just go away, it's an ongoing situation so we need to take that into account but many people are told they have PCOS when they don't so more info would be helpful.

Are you tracking your levels to be sure you're getting enough fat?? We may not need to have you on lowfat foods if you're not getting much fat otherwise.

We may want to switch your diet to be more PCOS friendly but I want to hear more about what your backstory is regarding even having PCOS.

Let's go ahead and go off SP and Vitex now to be sure you ovulate. Sometimes they can delay ovulation. I have you guys who are using them only take them the first part of them month and then drop them.

Licorice has been disappointing lately. On paper it sways pink (and I still believe it sways pink) but in terms of results it's been meh. If he's hating it it's fine to have him drop it.

The abstain thing really hasn't worked well for us, isn't worht missing the month over (plus for reasons we don't understand people get a lot of girls on holiday anyway). I would have you try in December, BD most of the time with condoms, and then have one unprotected attempt.

Don't worry about things like diet and exercise on vacation. People have found they actually have a much easier time sticking to the basics of diet while away because everything feels like a treat. Just do your best to stick in the overall tenets of diet, let yourself cheat when the need arises. Extra alcohol isn't an issue.

The one unprotected attempt is vital, try to have that at the first positive OPK if you can.

Everything else is looking great, but I def. want to get to the bottom of this PCOS mystery.

Thanks Atomic!
Was hoping you would reply :)

Sorry i should have been clearer about PCOS. Should have said PCO.
When I was younger (perhaps 10 years ago im 34 now) i was having issues with pain and discharge etc, and i had internal ultrasounds etc done and it came back with that i had way more than normal cysts on my ovaries - not PCOS. So i had a bunch on both, like 70% more than a normal person.
They said when i wanted to conceive if i was having issues to come back after 6 months. We tried for 6 months and nothing so we went back to see her and she gave us some tips and got DH sperm tested which was all fine. She said to give us another 6 months and then she was going to put us on clomid. We conceived before our appointment so no need for that.
After i had my son, i had a check and they said my ovaries were back to normal hooray! So i assume i dont have poly cystic ovaries anymore :) I never had the syndrome.

I have been off the pill now for 2 months and was on it again for approx 2 years prior (and then 15 years before that except for the year to conceive and 9 months pregnancy).

DH is happy to do and take and eat whatever will help, he wasnt that pleased with abstaining so thats good, but having said that when we conceived our son it was around every 2 days release. And lots of attempts around ovulation.
If he was to abstain even a little should it be 3-4 days before O?

I think i am ovulating at least this month as my temp charts and ava bracelet results have all pointed towards that as a day 17 ovulation. Ive always had a longer cycle 30-32 days and when we conceived i ovulated on day 20, so i know i generally ovulate later I think.

Thank you and great advice re: December. We will use condoms for the whole time and then just do one unprotected attempt.
So I should only be taking the vitex and saw p from days 1-20 is that right?

My diet i think is fairly easily tweaked, doing keto for so long i have a good idea about fats and macros, so im pretty sure i should be getting enough fats in there, what level should i be aiming for per day?

Ok. In that case I do want you on the alternate diet. You likely have tendencies towards PCOS even though your lifestyle has prevented you from developing it full blown. PCOS is not a disease as such, in fact most of us would get PCOS if our lifestyle supported it. Some of us are a little more prone to it than others, and since you've actually had cysts on a scan I think it behooves us to be proactive and use the alternate diet rather than the standard LE Diet.

(many people are told by doctors they have PCOS for no real reason, just a few irregular periods, and are not given the scans)

So from here on in I want you eating 50-60 g protein and fat (not counting the small amounts of pro and fat in fruit and vegetables) every day. I want you to skip white grains and have whole grains instead, and reduce sugar as much as you can stand to. And use ONLY full fat dairy, no skim or part skim dairy (this is very important!!!)

Having DH go vegetarian or vegan can help but he does not need to stick in the macros of the diet.

There's no such thing as abstaining only a little. Only 7+ days of abstain helps (if it helped, which it doesn't seem to, LOL). I would just let him "do what he does" with the one attempt. Abstaining for 4 days would only serve to make a big batch of sperm!

Let's take vitex and SP CD 1-14 from now on. They can delay O so we're having better results with dropping them around O Time even if you don't actually O for a few days after.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

Ok. In that case I do want you on the alternate diet. You likely have tendencies towards PCOS even though your lifestyle has prevented you from developing it full blown. PCOS is not a disease as such, in fact most of us would get PCOS if our lifestyle supported it. Some of us are a little more prone to it than others, and since you've actually had cysts on a scan I think it behooves us to be proactive and use the alternate diet rather than the standard LE Diet.

(many people are told by doctors they have PCOS for no real reason, just a few irregular periods, and are not given the scans)

So from here on in I want you eating 50-60 g protein and fat (not counting the small amounts of pro and fat in fruit and vegetables) every day. I want you to skip white grains and have whole grains instead, and reduce sugar as much as you can stand to. And use ONLY full fat dairy, no skim or part skim dairy (this is very important!!!)

Having DH go vegetarian or vegan can help but he does not need to stick in the macros of the diet.

There's no such thing as abstaining only a little. Only 7+ days of abstain helps (if it helped, which it doesn't seem to, LOL). I would just let him "do what he does" with the one attempt. Abstaining for 4 days would only serve to make a big batch of sperm!

Let's take vitex and SP CD 1-14 from now on. They can delay O so we're having better results with dropping them around O Time even if you don't actually O for a few days after.

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Thanks so much for this atomic!
Really appreciate your help and time and effort you put into this board!
I know it must take up so much of your time and I want you to know that I’m really appreciative!


Ok awesome! I’ve stopped taking SP and vitex and will start again 1-14 when my cycle starts.
That’s great about protein as I have been struggling a little coming from keto.
Have just done a shop and bought full fat again! Thank you!
I don’t eat much sugar anyway except in wine so that’s fine.
I have actually been struggling adding white grains in anyway as I had only 20gr of carbs before what’s your rec amount of carbs for macros?
To be honest I struggle with full vego but am trying at least 4 times a week. Can I still eat eggs? How does that go for sway pink?
Should I still eliminate red meat and just do chicken and veg? I don’t like fish.
And if I do one red meat a week is that ok?
Also do I still steer clear of soy?
And can I grab your thoughts on legumes like chickpeas and lentils?

Oh ok cool about abstaining - the guides I got sent from the website Rec 7-10 days so wasn’t sure.
Usually in normal circumstances it would be 3-5 days anyway but on holidays I’m thinking everyday so didn’t want to minimize the chances if that meant more big sperm!
We will use condoms and have the one attempt around O.

I’ll keep DH on everything and drinking soy and I’ll continue with aspirin, Metamucil, cal and mag and antihistamines.

Thanks again xx

Also what antihistamine should DH take before attempt?
In AUS we have several different types so which drug basis?

oh sorry can you bump this for me??? It's longer than I expected and I'm kind of in a rush right now. Thank you!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

oh sorry can you bump this for me??? It's longer than I expected and I'm kind of in a rush right now. Thank you!

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Bump for atomic!

If need be since you're coming off a keto diet you can always up the pro and fat by 5 g (or even 10, but start with 5 and see how it goes) This will cut carbs even more since you keep cals the same. And then once your body adjusts you may be able to cut back again.

Wine is fine!

Don't count carbs. Count cals, protein, and fat, and if you stay in those limits the carbs take care of themselves.

You don't need to do vegetarian. If you're within limits, you can have some meat now and then (and in fact many on the alt diet have small amounts of meat daily.) Yes please still eat eggs. All foods are allowed within limits but most people do prefer to give up red meat totally (except on special occasions or if really craving it)

One red meat a week is fine!! Always!

2-3 servings of soy a week is ok for most people but if you have thyroid issues you should steer clear of it.

Legumes within limits are fine, but they are of course carbier than meat for the same amount of protein. It may make more sense for you coming off a keto diet to have small amounts of chicken, turkey, eggs, dairy, even things like hot dogs or bacon than focusing on legumes as your main protein sources since you'll get more bang for your protein buck with less carbs that way.

The readymade plan is a much more "old school" type of sway that many people prefer. A lot of people prefer to do things the tried and true way rather than relying on my observations and our results, and that includes abstain. But it hasn't worked in our results.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Amyaims

Also what antihistamine should DH take before attempt?
In AUS we have several different types so which drug basis?

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They all work for swaying because they dry you up. If you want me to check a specific name I'm happy to do that but they're all drying. The only thing to watch out for is the kind of meds that inexplicably have both expectorant and antihistamine together since they're basiclaly the opposite of each other - expectorant makes mucus thinner, antihistamine dries it. It is actually silly they are sold together in one pill like they are, even for a cold remedy!!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

They all work for swaying because they dry you up. If you want me to check a specific name I'm happy to do that but they're all drying. The only thing to watch out for is the kind of meds that inexplicably have both expectorant and antihistamine together since they're basiclaly the opposite of each other - expectorant makes mucus thinner, antihistamine dries it. It is actually silly they are sold together in one pill like they are, even for a cold remedy!!

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So I’m pregnant!! Hooray!
7 weeks tomorrow :)

Our son took us about a year to conceive so after 6 months we are stoked.

So hopefully we swayed correctly.

This is what we did -

Started LE DIET in October last year (came off the pill in august and was using condoms)
We were away for 3 weeks in December in India so kept mostly vegetarian diet but we had lots of cheat days on holidays!
We had a lot of stress this year - we were in bushfires, my dog died on my birthday, then both lost / got stood down from jobs from corona, so if stress makes girls I think we will be fine!

We were doing LE diet (both of us) I was skipping breakfast every other day. Red meat only once a week. Alcohol most days (wine).
Antihistamines for me (I have allergies anyway)

Day 1-12 I was taking
Vitus angus
Calcium
Metamucil
Saw palmetto

Hubby was taking
Cranberry
Licorice root
Calcium

I ovulate late anyway and was doing digital clear blue tests.

Day 17 we had sex AM. I got a positive clear blue test on day 19(PM NOT AM)so we made one more attempt on day 20 (PM)
Hubby had a hot shower and took an antihistamine before the attempt.
Did a 5 min hold then jump and dump.

I was doing four or so basketball games a week, as well as body pump classes a few times a week. I think I had stopped these a week prior because of covid.
Was at my lowest weight almost ever and quite fit (definitely 7kg lighter than when I got pregnant with my son)

Anyway I think that’s all the info I have for now... will know the sex in a few weeks after the blood test.

Crossing all my fingers and toes.
I’m pretty sick (as in morning sickness) which I didn’t have with my son so hopefully that’s a good sign!
Also really weirdly my son keeps saying ‘it’s not a baby it’s a girl’ so hopefully that’s right!

Good luck and pink dust headed your way!

Re the morning sickness, unfortunately symptoms don't predict gender but I hope in your case they do!


Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months!

I GOT MY GIRL!!!!!
Harmony test came back and im expecting my little princess.
Im OVER THE MOON!!!

Thank you thank you yhank you atomic! x

WONDERFUL news Amy!!! Hugest congrats!!!!