So sick of nasty comments!

This morning I was at a gymnastic playcentre with my 3 boys. The baby was in a sling on me and my 3 and 5 year old were being perfectly well behaved, no issues at all, simply climbing the ladders and jumping down onto the mats provided which was exactly what they were meant to be doing. There were 2 other little boys near mine who were happily building a tower with foam blocks and knocking it down again. Again... that is what the equipment is there for, and what they are meant to be doing. None of the boys were being unruly, noisy, naughty, rough or doing anything that would harm another child. I was standing right by my kids watching them have fun and out of nowhere a mum (who I had not made eye contact with or in any way invited any interaction) suddenly approached me and said "3 boys hey...uggg... better you than me!" I was completely stunned, but before I could utter a word her 2 daughters came running up to us (she had walked away from them to come over and make this comment to me) and she ushered them away saying "Not near the boys, girls, not near the boys! The boys are rough. Boys are rough. Go and play over there away from them". And off she went with her 2 daughters. Thanks for that quality interaction, lady, it totally made my day! Glad to hear that you think my little family is something awful to be pitied, and have my little boys treated like some sort of contagious disease that your precious ones shouldn't dare come near! I could have said something about the fact that your daughter looked totally uncared for (dirty clothes etc) but you would have considered me rude, wouldn't you? Why is that the gender of our children is just about the only thing that people feel they can approach to to slam us down on?

My gosh was a rude woman!!!!

Firstly congrats on your three special boys, my family is almost exactly the same as yours - my boys are 4 (almost 5), 2 and 20 weeks. Secondly, shame on that lady for bringing up her daughters to have those perception of boys/men, that is really going to screw them up for future relationships! I don't actually get too many negative comments about my boys (there doesn't seem a social preference where I live, just one of each is desired!) but I do get the 'you must have your hands full' (to which I reply that my heart is equally full!). I'm a secondary teacher and I truly believe that there is no general difference between boys and girls as if one gender is easier, like everything they are groups of individuals who all act differently. What your story illustrates perfectly I think is a social shift where in kids are expected to be mini adultts and 'normal' kid behaviour like running, jumping, playing is labelled naughtiness. That woman should be ashamed of it, and yep, let's be thankful those 3 boys are yours because god knows how she would treat them.

A) I can't believe the gull of that woman! Treating boys like a contigious disease, or that they'd somehow hurt or maim her precious girls! GRRR

B) Kudos to your boys being out having fun and behaving good. I wish short-sighted people like that would take NOTICE of what is going on around them and see how well your sons were behaving.

That is just insane, what that woman said.

How horrible!! What makes people think they have a right to make comments that are so hurtful and rude? it sounds like your boys are lovely, and that woman was just downright rude. And it is awful that she is teaching her girls to feel that way about little boys!

I will tell you that if I were there, I would have been jealous of you with your 3 boys; a family of all boys is what I always wanted! I think you are very lucky.:)

Wow, what a great role model she is to her children! I'm sorry, I can't believe that!

I would have told her to keep her mouth shut because only a jealous person would make that kind of comment! Of course I am the type that would say it load enough for her to hear as she walked away and anyone else in the area ;)

She needed a good slap in the face!!!

I also think she was just jealous of you because she wants a boy too!

I feel sorry for those girls! To grow up with such a mum! Will she still say that when the girls are 40 years old? lol...
I would have told my boys not to play near girls; they scream and nag.....! (and just loud enough so she could have heard it!)
Stupid woman......

Oh my....some people are just to stupid to be true....

Better hope that her daughters become lesbians or else she might get something horrible as a grandson ;-)

I get the feeling that woman was under some kind of stress, and she took it out on you for no reason at all. Don''t take it personally, it really was HER problem. If i ever come across someone who says something like that to me i will just ask "Are you ok? It seems like you are having a bad day?".

That lady was just plain mean ! Her comments were rude and completely unnecessary.

Your family sounds lovely to me.

Sorry you had to be on the receiving end of her ignorance. She doesn't sound like much of a person, let alone a mother. It sounds like you have wonderful boys! :)

I can't believe how rude she was. When I read these post I always make up images in my head like a movie. Here is what I picture.... Your boys having fun having with each other as playmates so lucky to be brothers. You looking so cute with your adorable baby in a sling. You are making motherhood look easy, peaceful and fun. Then I picture the other lady... Ugly, bad die job of a hair color, possibly missing some teeth, raspy smokers voice making her rude comments. Then I see her daughters beautiful little girls who my heart breaks for them having Cruella de Vil (from 101 Dalmatians) as there mother. I do not know if this helps but if I saw you today I would have told you how much i love seeing three of kind any gender and then told my boys to jump in and go play.

OMG what a freaking bitch!!!!

I'm so sorry you had a run-in like that! It continues to amaze me what people will say when they see 3+ of a kind, regardless of the gender.

I have four boys and I attract nasty comments everywhere. My boys are sweet and well behaved too. Not agressive at all. Most of the "wow, you got your hands full" comments I don't mind. But some people are downright mean. A lady in my son's gymnastics class said, "oh 4 boys, how awful! I have a boy and a girl, and I can tell you that having a girl is SO special, you just can't be a mom without one. I NEED my girl so much its just not the same at all with boys. Girls are just more special. So sad you have all boys." I was so stunned with her rudeness I just didn't know what to say. All I thought was what a B@tch! Now I wish I had said, "well, I feel sorry for your son then..." or something to have embarrassed her.

Fun family that's rough! I will say though ... as a mom of all girls you hear "Oh, wouldn't want to be in your shoes when you've got all those teenage daughters." I was LITERALLY in labor and one of the nurses said to me "THREE girls? My one daughter is SO dramatic. I'm so sorry for you!" From an L&D nurse. I told her maybe it was a parenting issue and not a gender issue since my two daughters were just lovely. And it felt REALLY nice to say that.

The comments I hate the most those are the ones people make in front of my older children ... DD1 is 6 and it's not like she doesn't get it when someone makes a remark about having all girls being some kind of tragedy. She (DD1) actually asked me last week if I picked all girls and I told her no, it's chance whether you have boys or girls, but that I couldn't think of anything better than her and her two sisters. I absolutely HATE that people make my child question her value in our family because of her gender.

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The comments I hate the most those are the ones people make in front of my older children ... DD1 is 6 and it's not like she doesn't get it when someone makes a remark about having all girls being some kind of tragedy. She (DD1) actually asked me last week if I picked all girls and I told her no, it's chance whether you have boys or girls, but that I couldn't think of anything better than her and her two sisters. I absolutely HATE that people make my child question her value in our family because of her gender.

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Oh my, yes, yes yes to this. My oldest are twins, almost 9, and they are very sweet and sensitive and caring. I HATE when people make rude comments about how awful it must be to have all boys in front of them. They are not stupid. They get it and it HURTS people! Its so wrong and makes me furious when people comment in front of them, as if I shouldn't want them because they are boys.

Some of these comments are un_____ real. I'm speechless.

Better you than me? SERIOUSLY??

What an inspid wench. Maybe I'm just bitter today after reading some awful commentary in people magazine's baby section about how crappy it must be to be a girl mom but I'm the mom who won't even allow my DD to say crap like "Girls rule, boys drool' chants. Don't even get me started on the t-shirts. They piss me off. Boys don't drool nor do they suck anymore than every girl is a trouble making Princess or Diva.

begonia - sorry I missed your birth! Congratulations! And I hope to God you asked for another L&D nurse. I wouldn't have allowed her in the room after that.

I usually get 6 boys!!!!!!!!!!!! But I don't mind that I love the reaction. I love when someone asks how many children have you, I say 6, and they go wow and then I add 6 boys I love the reaction. Noone has ever said anything bad really. I did have a midwife an hour after I gave birth to DS3 say to me, you will have to go again for the 'dishwasher'??!!! I just said back to her, why would I do that I can buy that in any electrical appliance store!!!!!!!!!!

So wait pep, was she referring to a girl baby as your dishwasher?!?! That's beyond offensive ... I hope I'm misunderstanding that one! 6 boys is awesome IMO :)

It does make me think though what's shocking about so many of the derogatory comments for girl moms is that they usually come from WOMEN. I've actually never had a man say anything to me re: having all girls.

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Originally Posted by begonia

It does make me think though what's shocking about so many of the derogatory comments for girl moms is that they usually come from WOMEN. I've actually never had a man say anything to me re: having all girls.

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Interesting! And rather sad too - I don't like comments against gender in general, but it really irritates me when I hear a woman dissing another woman's daughters :(. Your girls are beautiful gifts Begonia. :HH:

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Originally Posted by Myloves

Interesting! And rather sad too - I don't like comments against gender in general, but it really irritates me when I hear a woman dissing another woman's daughters :(. Your girls are beautiful gifts Begonia. :HH:

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Thank you so much; this post made my day :kiss:

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Originally Posted by begonia

It does make me think though what's shocking about so many of the derogatory comments for girl moms is that they usually come from WOMEN.

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EXACTLY!!!!! The rudest comments I'm getting from my MIL, she never miss the opportunity to tell me how I failed as a woman and mother because I didn't produce any boys.

I don't want to be rude to her as she is my DH's mother, but maybe I should start to talk back. :think: DH is deaf and blind when it comes to his mom, he always says she means nothing wrong. REALLY? Funny way of showing it :mad:

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Originally Posted by begonia

So wait pep, was she referring to a girl baby as your dishwasher?!?! That's beyond offensive ... I hope I'm misunderstanding that one! 6 boys is awesome IMO :)

It does make me think though what's shocking about so many of the derogatory comments for girl moms is that they usually come from WOMEN. I've actually never had a man say anything to me re: having all girls.

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Yeah that was the term used, I was so p***ed off with her, but she got the message when I said about a dishwasher been an electrical appliance!!