My weird cluster theory

For some time now I’ve been developing this weird cluster theory that’s been bothering me - in a certain group of women only so many can have kids if the same gender. I can’t explain it, so I’ll give examples. For instance we are 13 colleagues (all women) in my team at work and after I got pregnant with my DS2, five more colleagues had babies- all of them girls. What would be my chance to have a girl after five consecutive girls in the team!!! It’s really bugging me, you know :( a sixth girl in a row, seems improbable to me...Just like in my DS1 kindergarten group- before I got pregnant all second babies in the families of the group were female, so I thought Well I could be the next on the girl queue... well I wasn’t. It was like the quota for a girl was over. I am strict on my LE diet (15 weeks now), in my brisk walking for at least 60 mins 5-7 days a week, will stick to one attempt but the facts still sing to me- sixth in a row, don’t be delusional. Please point to me some facts that could break my theory... It makes me despair in my swaying

I totally understand what you are saying. The girl quota! Sorry mam, we are out of girls today :) But I think the only answer to this is: look at another peer group? Look at your yoga class buddys or your neighbours etc.

I am with you, 14 weeks on the LE. Keep strong!

The gender of other people's babies don't affect the gender of yours. For some reason we see "runs" like that sometimes but it doesn't mean anything. Just like Slingers suggests, look at OTHER groups you're a part of and you'll see that in other places you're surrounded by all boys or a mix.

If you look at big families like the Duggars, you can see long runs of one gender and then long runs of the other. This is in the same family!!

In my extended family we had whole bunch of boys in a row, then a whole bunch of girls, then more boys again. It's just that we notice it when it stands out.

It’s just that this is the only group I am currently a part of, when the last one got pregnant I was thinking- great, they want a boy, I see her with a boy, now there will be a boy to break the girl thread and then it will finally be my turn to be girl-ready. When she announced a girl I was like- whaaat, you stole my girl chances! Purely logically I comprehend the fact that what I get doesn’t depend on other families’ kids, but it’s really kept bothering me since my last “peer” group model.
My first attempt for a girl will be in the next few days and I am a bit scared that meanwhile nobody from work got pregnant with a boy to break the circle and that the role will be passed to me

I understand it's hard not to think that way. But I suspect that even if they'd had all boys, you'd be thinking "there's something in the water, we will all have boys" and if they had mixed genders you'd be counting to see if there were even numbers of boys and girls, which one was "due" to come up, that kind of thing.

These are just tricks our brains play on us. Those of us with boys especially, we want to control our universe so we are always looking for patterns in everything so we can guard against them. But this has the downside of making us see patterns that aren't there! (my husband often chastises me for this!)

I know what you mean. My son is the only boy in our extended family, everyone else has all girl families! It feels like we couldn't also be so lucky?

But the odds of 6 girls in a row (assuming 50/50 odds for each pregnancy, and all independent events) is exactly the same as the odds of g-g-g-g-g-b, both have a 1/64 chance of happening.
It's the same as if you flipped a coin 6 times, the chance of 6 heads in a row is 1/64, but once the first 5 heads are thrown, the next one still has a 50/50 chance of being either heads or tails. It feels like you should be "due for a tails after all those heads", but really it's still a 50% chance.

With a group of babies, it is more likely to have a mix of genders than all of one, just because there's so many more ways of making a mixed combination (such as gbgbgb, ggbbgg, gbggbg, gbbbbg, bbgbgb, bgbgbb, etc etc), but there's only one gggggg or bbbbbbb. 1/64 chance of all girls, 1/64 chance of all boys, and 62/64 chance of having a mix of some sort.

...I like maths :p

Thanks, guys, I realise it’s all in my head... I didn’t realise that this was another part of my control freakishness:) now I’m thinking - with my first attempt within the next several days I haven’t managed to cope with it, it may ruin my sway. I have about two days to beat it...

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Originally Posted by Chocolatina

Thanks, guys, I realise it’s all in my head...

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The human brain is wired to see order and patterns and balance and meaning, humans aren't so good at perceiving true randomness. So don't beat yourself up about it :)

I was weirdly worried about this kind of thing when I was pregnant! I had it in my head that certain months or moon phases were good for girls and I had missed them. I’d see a failed girl sway that was like mine in some way and assume it meant my sway was destined to fail. I’d see a rush of girls born a month before mine and assume it meant I missed the girl month. If someone was due with a boy the same week as me I would panic. I actually looked up the hashtag for my weeks gestation to try to determine if there was a decent amount of girls due. All this stuff is certifiably nuts. But I did it anyway 😂

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Originally Posted by clarkrl2

But I did it anyway 😂

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Would you mind sharing your sway, how did you succeed? I really need to hear some good statistics;) Thanks in advance:)

Yes! I’ll see if I can find it.

https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum...ay-result.html
This is my sway

That’s great, thanks a lot! Did you run or walk on the treadmill? I’m doing brisk walking with my toddler in the stroller for 60-70 mins a day and keep thinking if it is cardio enough :)

Yes, that is enough cardio. You don't need to do anything more than that.

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Originally Posted by Chocolatina

That’s great, thanks a lot! Did you run or walk on the treadmill? I’m doing brisk walking with my toddler in the stroller for 60-70 mins a day and keep thinking if it is cardio enough :)

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I jogged. Definitely wasn’t full on running the whole time. When atomic said time mattered most I cut back on intensity.

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Originally Posted by clarkrl2

I jogged. Definitely wasn’t full on running the whole time. When atomic said time mattered most I cut back on intensity.

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:agree: I actually prefer to see people (especailly if you're not fit to start with) do walking. When people try to exercise more than they are able to they end up injured and unable to exercise at all!!

"Intense exercise" is meant to refer to the amount of TIME exercising (60 min a day, 4-7 days a week, and 6-7 is better) and NOT how hard you're working. Walking is fine!

Well guess what- I have another pregnant colleague (our office has turned into an incubator lol), if hers is a girl again after 5 girls in a row in the office I will totally feel despairing in my swaying cause.

I know it's so hard to believe but hey, maybe there IS something in the water and you are in the water too!

I could’ve written this! I have all these weird theories in my head about patterns and who has what next will affect the gender of my baby. I know it’s crazy but I can’t help it, your not the only one :)

I am kind of relieved that this madness isn’t only in my head :) I feel almost regretful that I haven’t returned to work after the birth of my DS2 yet, maybe there are some hormones in the air in our office room and I cannot avail of them 😂
Meanwhile I started developing different clusters and patterns- my university roommates, my BFFs from school and such... you know- something to keep my hopes up :)