It seems pretty common for the first cycle of ivf to fail. (Am I right?) So, if you spend $20K or more only to get a BFN, how devastating is it? Does it damage your relationship? Do you go through the same depression as you would if you were having a gender opposite? Does it make your GD even more rabid? How do you justify to yourself the large amount of money gone forever? Do clinics do anything to help with this?