Back again after 2 failed sways making me mum of 6 boys

Hi ladies,

I'm not new here (quite the opposite in fact!) but haven't been active in a long old time! I never thought I'd find myself back again, but am considering going for my seventh and def last child! I turned 43 last week and have a 6 month old and 3 year old (failed sways) and 11 year old triplets and a 13 year old. I also had a mmc at 11 weeks from my first sway...

Anyway, I must be mental, but am wondering whether to sway again one last time or go for pgs.... My 6 month old took 2 years to conceive and I had almost given up swaying. I had 2 attempts the month I conceived and wonder if I'd stuck to one it would have been pink. I've just been for initial ivf tests which showed I have a good egg reserve. I just don't know if I can handle the stress, cost and I imagine unpleasant pgs journey.

Thought I'd come back to you lovely lot for some advice!

Xx

Well, even with a good egg reserve PGS with your own eggs may be an uphill battle. Would you consider donor eggs?? That would be my recommendation - PGS with donor eggs.

CAn you tell me everything you did with your other sways? There may be something we can tweak.

And welcome back!

Welcome back Pinkmeup!
I think if you have the option then pgs is always the way to go.
I too have two failed sways (ds2 & 3) and if I could I would do pgd in a heartbeat.
I will be ttc again but unfortunately pgd is just not feasible for me so swaying one more time. Wishing you all the best with your decision and I look forward to hearing your journey xx

Thank you and all the best for your next sway!! Do you have a gut feeling why yours failed? Xx

Thanks atomic! Can I ask why donor eggs would be advantageous?! I wouldn't want to go that route really but don't see why it would be more successful? I actually swayed 3 times. The first ended in a mmc at 11 weeks and I thought may have been caused by aspirin or aspartame so I dropped those. My second sway I posted and did strict le diet, peppermint tea, hubby had hot showers, wore tight whites and we did fr but then ended up having two attempts as I thought I may have ovulated later. Third attempt took two whole years to conceive by which point I was desperate so was just veggie which I still am and a whole lot of praying and old wives tales. I ended up having two attempts the month I conceived again although 4 days apart. I had been told by a clairvoyant that she could see a girl waiting and that it would def be a girl that time. She then confirmed I had infact conceived a girl and both she and I were over the moon. I was elated for weeks until 16 week gender scan revealed the opposite!!! Needless to say I won't be seeing her again. Number 6 is the most beautiful baby I have ever seen though and an absolute angel that I wouldn't change for anything. But I remain incomplete despite my life now being pretty bloody tough are times. Perhaps naively I still wonder if sticking at one attempt at pos opk would work!? (Shoot me now)... What a journey! Xx

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Originally Posted by Pinkmeup

Thanks atomic! Can I ask why donor eggs would be advantageous?! I wouldn't want to go that route really but don't see why it would be more successful? I actually swayed 3 times. The first ended in a mmc at 11 weeks and I thought may have been caused by aspirin or aspartame so I dropped those. My second sway I posted and did strict le diet, peppermint tea, hubby had hot showers, wore tight whites and we did fr but then ended up having two attempts as I thought I may have ovulated later. Third attempt took two whole years to conceive by which point I was desperate so was just veggie which I still am and a whole lot of praying and old wives tales. I ended up having two attempts the month I conceived again although 4 days apart. I had been told by a clairvoyant that she could see a girl waiting and that it would def be a girl that time. She then confirmed I had infact conceived a girl and both she and I were over the moon. I was elated for weeks until 16 week gender scan revealed the opposite!!! Needless to say I won't be seeing her again. Number 6 is the most beautiful baby I have ever seen though and an absolute angel that I wouldn't change for anything. But I remain incomplete despite my life now being pretty bloody tough are times. Perhaps naively I still wonder if sticking at one attempt at pos opk would work!? (Shoot me now)... What a journey! Xx

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Just jumping in here. I did ivf with pgs. Age plays a huge role with egg quality .
I believe she is recommending and RE drs would as well bc after the age of 35 eggs are considered less quality. If you are spending thousands of dollars and months of invasive treatments you want the best outcome. Using donor eggs after the age of 35 is best way to increase your success of your cycle.

Hope's this helps. Good luck in your journey [emoji175]

Sent from my SM-G950W using Tapatalk

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Originally Posted by Pinkmeup

Thank you and all the best for your next sway!! Do you have a gut feeling why yours failed? Xx

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Thank you pinkmeup.
I think about why they failed all the time and even though I'm not religious or anything I just feel like the only answer is that my boys were meant to be here. I haven't met ds3 yet (3.5 weeks to go) but ds2 is just so special- everyone says so from family, friends to strangers on the street he is just one of a kind and puts a smile on all our faces.

I guess technically I was swaycessed both times ( my personality unfortunately) I mean we did everything so I'm really torn as to whether I sway at all this last time. In one way I think swaying just does not work for us and that if I just leave it up to fate maybe that's what might work but on the other hand this really has to be our last ( medically, mentally, age wise and financially) so knowing that can I really leave it to chance or hope that finally all the hard work DH and I put into swaying will pay off just this once?

I truly hope you get your girl and like I said I think if you have the chance to do PGD then it is worth a try. I would do it in a heartbeat!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Pinkmeup

Thanks atomic! Can I ask why donor eggs would be advantageous?! I wouldn't want to go that route really but don't see why it would be more successful? I actually swayed 3 times. The first ended in a mmc at 11 weeks and I thought may have been caused by aspirin or aspartame so I dropped those. My second sway I posted and did strict le diet, peppermint tea, hubby had hot showers, wore tight whites and we did fr but then ended up having two attempts as I thought I may have ovulated later. Third attempt took two whole years to conceive by which point I was desperate so was just veggie which I still am and a whole lot of praying and old wives tales. I ended up having two attempts the month I conceived again although 4 days apart. I had been told by a clairvoyant that she could see a girl waiting and that it would def be a girl that time. She then confirmed I had infact conceived a girl and both she and I were over the moon. I was elated for weeks until 16 week gender scan revealed the opposite!!! Needless to say I won't be seeing her again. Number 6 is the most beautiful baby I have ever seen though and an absolute angel that I wouldn't change for anything. But I remain incomplete despite my life now being pretty bloody tough are times. Perhaps naively I still wonder if sticking at one attempt at pos opk would work!? (Shoot me now)... What a journey! Xx

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Oh wow what a journey you've had!
I'm so sorry you went through that with the clairvoyant.
I wish I had done the one attempt at pos opk this time. I ended up doing every 4 days- so had one attempt 4 days before o then one attempt on o day because I was on clomid and opks weren't working for me. Ds2 was one attempt 3 days before o but I wasn't on clomid. This time ideally I'd like to do one attempt 1-2 days before o and be on clomid.

Another option a friend of mine is in the process of is an embryo adoption (ie. "adopt" a female embryo from a couple who is done having babies and has leftovers.) It's less hassle than a traditional adoption of a child (embryos are considered property), the embryos are already made and tested so that cuts out most of the uncertain IVF process (ie. I was 34 with pcos and it took us 2 rounds to get ONE embryo that made it to be tested, thankfully it was normal and our desired gender and stuck, but it very easily could have not been so lucky and we'd be out a bunch of money. My pregnancies are high risk and I either wanted to risk one last pregnancy for a living daughter or to just be content with our 3 boys already here- risking another pregnancy and possibly having a 4th boy wasn't an option for me so ivf was the only way I was comfortable getting pregnant again.) DS3 was a failed sway, the cycle after a miscarriage, one attempt, on clomid, and breastfeeding -granted I wasn't working out much or doing diet all that well- but the one attempt in itself didn't make a huge difference for us. A good friend of mine is now pregnant with her 4th girl. She lives a totally classic 'girl sway' lifestyle naturally so I was figuring it would be another girl, and it is. I feel like I'm similar but for boys.

At 43 the odds of success with IVF/PGD using your own eggs is going to be very low. Older women just don't respond to the medication the way younger women do. And many more of our eggs are poor quality. Since you need lots and lots of eggs to end up with only a very few healthy normal XX to implant, the odds are very much against success at 43 so I would suggest at least taking a look at donor eggs.

As for swaying, I'd have you do this diet both for egg quality and for better success with swaying - whenever someone has had an opposite with LE the normal way I have them switch and we've had good luck with that. https://www.genderdreaming.com/forum...ar-issues.html

I would strongly urge you do to exercise.

I would have you eliminate all the things that don't work and just stand in the way of conception in order to focus on the one attempt. This means dropping herbs, FR, timing, jellies, antihistamine, and yes even tighty whiteys (:agree: no aspirin or cranberry, they haven't worked and I agree they may be contributing to losses)